The Blonde Blogshell™

HAPPY NEW YEAR

2011-01-03T18:30:00.003Z

I cannot believe it's 2011. I love this time of the year. It's like the slate is wiped clean and we can start afresh. This is the time when I create my vision boards of everything I would like to accomplish this year. I write everything down, or I put pictures up that represent my dream/goal.
I love doing them. I put them onto a big board in a place where I can see it every single day, as a constant reminder.

I came back from my holiday in Ballito, refreshed and excited to start the New Year. There is so much I would like to accomplish, so I'm going to put plans into place, take action and with a little bit of luck and a lot of hard work, hopefully they will all come true. That's what is special about a new year ... the opportunities and possibilities are fresh.

I would like to really wish you all a Wonderful New Year. I hope 2011 is filled with love and laughter, health and wealth, and everything else your heart desires.
I really appreciate all the love, kindness and support you showed me in 2010 and here's to a happy 2011 together.

Cougar Town ......

2010-12-10T08:37:00.005Z

Wow it's been an interesting time. The saying "Careful what you wish for..." is very very true.

I had a date with the guy I went to varsity with. We went to the Throbbing Strawberry - they make good pizza and cocktails. The Throbbing Strawberry. I know. I really can't make this stuff up. I feel like I've entered a comedy.
Well, it was awesome. We caught up after all these years, we chatted about the past, about what's been happening and it was like I had seen him yesterday. He really is a phenomenal guy and actually one of the last few good guys around.
Problem: *why does everything have to be so complicated?* .... While he is a really good guy, we get on like a house on fire, laugh, joke around... He's just a friend. I really can't see past that. Such a pity, in a way, but better. I do not want to string him along at all.

I was then supposed to see the hottie but I never heard from him. Just as I was about to strike him out, he called me to make plans. So... I'm kind of excited, but the big question mark is... Is this a date? Or a catch up?
My very good friend, Twin, happens to be one of his best mates. We had such a laugh...
Twin: If he takes you to the Brazen Head or any other pub, it's a catch up. If he takes you else where, it's a date.
Right...so with that knowledge in hand...I was interested to see what the suggestion would be.
When he called to make plans, he asked me where I'd like to go... I then said: "I don't mind, where would you like to go?"
Gosh. That is such a typical girly thing, isn't it?
Lame.
So, he said there are so many great places to go to and he'll think about it and let me know closer to the time.
Sounds promising, right? Unless of course, he's talking about there being so many great pubs to go to. Time will tell.

Bachelor #3 (the one that I met at a braai) ... I don't really feel a connection with and rather than string him along, I'd rather just not entertain it. There have been mixed reviews amongst my girlfriends ... who, by the way... are living vicariously through me. My friends are married or in serious relationships heading towards the chapel, that I am really one of the last few single mates. I think they are secretly/not so secretly LOVING my apparently exciting single life.
Anyway, the mixed reviews are that I should go on the date because "you just never know" and then some agree with me, saying that they know this guy really likes me and if I don't feel anything, why entertain it?

So yes... this is an interesting time. I'm having fun.

Speaking of ... I entered Cougar Town over this past weekend ... ahem... I made out with a guy 6 years my junior.
Good grief.
*BLUSH*

This isn't really anything I've ever done before. I am seriously the girl who is a relationship type of girl... I've never done the flings, never had a one night stand and certainly do not hook up with guys at clubs.
I guess, I've done things the other way around. While everyone in their teens and early twenties were doing that, I was in the serious relationship.
So yes ... This is all lots of fun and the best part of going through what I have, is that I now know EXACTLY what I want and what I don't want. I'm not going to settle. Simple.

Happy Friday everyone!
Tomorrow is a Christmas Party with all my mates. We're each bringing a dish and a secret santa gift. My friends and I tend to go all out on things, so I am super excited!

Twilight Zone....

2010-12-03T08:44:00.005Z

December, huh? Where on earth did this year go? I cannot wrap my head around the fact that it's nearly Christmas and 2011.

I guess my denial isn't going to change anything... Christmas and New Years is coming whether I like it or not.

I definitely need to get into the Christmas spirit.

Soooo... I feel like I've entered the Twilight Zone.

It's been a while since I've actually gone on a date. There has been nothing. Nada.

I was complaining to my girlfriends the other day, and admittedly they were all right. I haven't exactly been in town long enough to actually meet the creatures from Mars.

Are there any decent men left in the world?

They're either pigs or gay.

Oh and my "gaydar" isn't working. Anyone know where I take that in to be fixed? Seriously.

I totally eye-f*cked a guy in a business suit the other day, he was drinking his coffee (his pinkie was down on the cup) and he was H.O.T. ....... Until he answered his phone. "Hello Mister Fabulous!! Ooooh I just can't wait to see you again sexy man!"

*cue the crickets*

SIGH.

Then, I met an incredible guy the other day, no really... I was actually quite impressed. I even thought that it might have restored my faith .... Only to be told that he is gay, but HE doesn't know it yet.

O. M. G.

Really?

Really? I seriously did not pick that up at all.

I was also reminded about my "eye-f*cking" the gay guy the other day.

Enough said.

Special K and I were talking about this subject over a skinny latte. I think my friends think that I am "fishing" when I say this, but I'm not and I genuinely mean it.

I think I may possibly be single for the rest of my life. The saddest part? I'm not a cat person. So investing in cats and cat food isn't really feasible.

Yay for me.

Anyway, back to the Twilight Zone story ... So there Special K and I are, discussing my single life, when I said: "I would just like to be wooed a little bit. I'd like to just go on a date. Is it so hard?"

Special K sips on her latte, rolls her eyes and says: "You are NOT going to be single for the rest of your life. You've been focusing on your career and you've been loving the single life, yes or no?"

"Yes. You're right... about the latter part, maybe not the first part."

"Any guy would be lucky to have you... He'll come a long when you least expect it and when the timing is right."

"I'm not fishing."

"I know. I'm just stating facts."

We finished up our B&K moment and headed out.

Well, careful what you wish for....

Not even 24 hours later, I got asked out on a date by a guy I met a few years ago. Admittedly I always thought he was hot, but never knew he was interested. I haven't seen him in years.

I called Special K up and told her the irony/good news. Thing is....Am I reading too much into it? Is it a date or is it just a catch up.

Oh the complications.

2 hours later, I get a message from a guy I went to varsity with, who asked me out on the second date - it's also been a few years.

3 hours later I got another message from a guy I had met at a braai a few months ago, he had got my number and asked me for dinner.

OK. Seriously. Where are the hidden cameras?

Are my friends behind this?

Apparently not.

Cue Twilight music.... 3 dates, within a few hours, 24 hours after I said and I quote: "I would just love to go out on a date... be wooed a little, you know?"

Now this isn't narcissism, but boy I'm shocked.

So I may or may not have 3 dates ... Maybe 2 and a half dates ... I've said yes to all ... why not?

So while I'm on a roll.... I'd also like to lose 7kgs, find my affordable dream home, I'd like my own TV show and I would like to triple my salary.

Thanks.

Blogs

2010-11-09T10:08:00.003Z

I do love reading people blogs...perhaps that's why I have no time to write this one anymore...

Can you believe we're a few days away from Christmas? Where did this year go?

Take a little wonder over to a friend of mines blog ...

www.baileyschneider.co.za ... click on the Orange B to get to the blog and feel free to comment - I know how much she appreciates it :-)

xxxx

Croatia and Switzerland

2010-09-14T08:32:00.010+01:00

Wow. It's been a while. The last time I blogged it was a month after break up. Well it's now 3 and a half months since the break up and I am really good. Hell, I'm impressed with myself. I am stronger than I thought.

Sometimes it still hurts, like finding out he has a new girlfriend when his reason for breaking up was that he couldn't be in a relationship with anyone and needed to find himself...Oh look at that... a month after our break up, he got himself a new girlfriend. Men.

The good news? He really does make it easier to move on and get over him.

Croatia is ridiculous. I am sorry. It is not possible for a place to be THAT gorgeous and magical. Unless you've been there, I can't actually describe how MAGICAL the place is. The ocean is turquoise. There is no beach sand, so the clean, clear water is warm and extremely salty. You literally float and bob (no treading water) - it's amazing.

The culture is warm, friendly and welcoming. It doesn't matter who you are, you are welcomed and welcomed warmly. We swam from our villa to another island about 600/700m away and when we got onto the beach, a warm, friendly woman invited

us into her stone home for coffee. Incredible. Coming from South Africa, we obviously we skeptical and wondering if we were walking into a sex-trade syndicate. Kidding. But you do feel guilty for feeling so on guard when people are so friendly and genuine.

The villages are just gorgeous with lots of stone homes and buildings, cobbled streets, wild olive trees, vineyards, gorgeous cafes, shops to die for, shoes to die for, the vegetables and fruit are just too delicious. I have been spoilt with the taste of genuine olive oil, home made wine and the potatoes and tomatoes are something else.

It was exactly what I needed. My soul completely rejuvenated! I bonded even more with my amazing-don't-know-what-I-would-do-without-them girlfriends. We had fun regardless of what we did, from the car trips and ferry trips to the walking around the cobble streets, hav

ing coffees, lying in the sun listening to music, shopping, taking taxi boats from island to island listening to Croatian bands while drinking G&T's, finding children play areas and satisfying our inner child, cooking together, our wine drinking, sitting in peace and watching the ocean, our coffee and chocolate tradition before bed and our laughs. I will never forget this trip. It was the best trip I have ever had.

Dubrovnik

The Stone Villas where we stayed - we had the place to OURSELVES!!

The view from our villas.

Vela Luka.

Special K and my feet on the speed boat :-)

Split - best place for shopping :-)

I also had the pleasure of going to Switzerland... I haven't seen my gran, cousins, uncle and rest of the family in 5 years. I don't really know much about my Swiss family and spending time with my 81 year old gran was just so amazing. I found out things about her and my late grandfather, found out things about my dad, how he was when he was little, all the stories etc etc ... It's made me learn more about who I am and where I come from. The last time I saw my grandpa, I was 9 years old (1992) and he passed away in 2001. I learnt so much about him and there are several things about his personality and character and even his hobbies, that now make so much sense... I have a lot of them and never knew where they came from. Awakening.

I've also only ever been to Switzerland in winter. It was most bizarre to not see the country covered in snow. Instead, it almost looked fake. I have never seen such greenery everywhere. It was so lush and I honestly think the alps looked like they are covered in green felt material.

It was quite something to think that in one morning, I had been in Croatia lying in the sun on the beach and then not even 14 hours later, I was hiking in the alps and standing in snow that had fallen and was starting to melt.

The photos I took, looked like I had doctored them. Incredible.

Switzerland is such a clean country and it's so efficient. If the train says it will leave at 15h03 ... it leaves at 15h03, not 15h04 or a second after. Wow.

It was a whirlwind trip and I travelled around Switzerland within 6 days, I even crossed into Germany for a day. It's amazing how easy that is in Europe.

The food. Don't get me started on the food and the chocolate. *drool*

Davos

Distractions

2010-06-30T11:44:00.007+01:00

I had a good sob...2 days ago it was a month since the breakup. They say it gets easier, but I'm still waiting for that.

One thing I have done is kept busy, good grief! I have been out every single night for dinners and coffees and more dinners. I still feel a little empty, but as long as I keep moving and keep seeing my incredible friends, I'm OK.

I sat on my bed having a good sob about it being a month and then realised that next month will be 2 months, BUT I will be on a flight to Europe and I will most certainly be enjoying a good wine or 2 on the plane.

I've booked my airtickets and I'm going to be jetting off to Europe next month for 2 beautiful weeks. In fact, in exactly one month from today I will be experiencing Europe in the Summer for the first time. I've only ever been in Winter, where I tend to look like the Michelin man thanks to all the layers of jerseys and snow jackets.

I have 6 flights to 6 different airports in 2 weeks. A little crazy.

Special K and 4 other girlfriends are jetting off a few days before I can- it's a pity I can't fly there with them but they will be fetching me from Dubrovnik - all very Sex and The City style and then it's off to the most incredible villa we'll be staying it. It is on an island off of Croatia and apparently it is just absolutely BREATH TAKING.

In fact, let me just post some pictures from the website :)

Looks awful, hey?

After the 8 days with them, I will be flying to Switzerland to visit my family. I can't wait to spend some time with my gran. I hardly know her so I'm looking forward to finding out about my heritage and hearing the stories she has to offer about her experiences.

I really really need this break. I love travelling. I love experiencing the sounds, sights, cultures, music, dishes, people etc and I plan to take it all in.

I can't wait to be going overseas with my amazing girlfriends ... what amazing FUN we're going to have. Special K and I have never been overseas together so this is really special for us.

I'm grateful for the distraction - it gives me something to look forward to.

Speaking of distractions, there is a very gorgeous man that has been flirting with me and I think I have been flirting back. I say this because I am actually ridiculously bad at it and it probably isn't flirting at all. Still ... .

It's fun though...and a little weird, but nice. It is very innocent from my side.

The reality is, I still feel very heart sore but I know it will get better ... that's what everyone and every bloody cliche says.

I'm just going through the motions. I'm going out, I'm meeting new people all the time, I'm crying alot and I'm laughing too.

I'm certainly trying this Single Life on and while I feel very out of my depth, I have survived - with plenty of scrapes and bruises, yes, but my heart is still beating - even if it is a different beat.

Hopp Schwiiz Hopp and SA Tourism board should pay me

2010-06-17T16:12:00.007+01:00

My friends and family have been keeping me so busy I actually don't know what the inside of my apartment looks like, except when I need to shower.
I'm not complaining. Being broken hearted is a bitch, but it's so much easier with amazing friends, wine and my new Personal Trainer who is honestly...AH-MAZING!!

Soooo chuffed for Switzerland! Whoop!! HOPP SCHWIITZ HOPP!! My family dressed in red, my dad had his Switzerland Makarapa hat on and we set out to the Monte Casino Fan park, where we discovered we were the only Swiss supporters in a sea of Spaniards.
Well I can tell you that Spain and Switzerland are completely surprised ... for 2 very different reasons.
We were the only ones shouting and jumping up and down while shocked Spaniards looked on.
Honestly, I wish the Swiss luck had rubbed off on Bafana Bafana. *sigh*
Well, I'm still flying my SA flag with proud.

One of the things I loved at the fan park, was seeing all the foreigners. There were Mexicans, Brits, Argentinians and Americans - all very festive.
Sitting at the table next to us were 3 American dudes playing cards (as you do) ... my family and I got chatting to them and asked them the most original questions ever.
Me: "So... Is this your first time to South Africa?"
USA: "It's our first time to Africa, Yeah!"
Me: "And?? Whaddya think?"
USA: "Oh it's great, just great! So friendly."
Me: "Ja, it's cool hey? It's not as bad as the international media make out. So, are you surprised we don't have pet lions?"
USA laugh: "Yeah totally. It's like a whole city and everything."
....and so the convo continued. We discovered that they had discovered we really don't have a great public transport system, so they are literally cooped up in their hotel. They haven't seen anything!
Unacceptable. Before I realised what I was doing I invited them to join my friends and I at a restaurant where we were going to watch Bafana Bafana vs Uruguay.
Me: "You have to join me! It's going to be such a jol!"
USA: "A what?"
Me: "Oh. Right. A jol... a party ... We call it a jol!"
USA: "Cool. Let's go!"
Clearly they hadn't been out because they were so excited they practically led me to my car.
Me: "I'm just putting my bag in the boot of my car."
USA: "The what?"
Me: "Oh. Um. The trunk of my car."
We start driving...
Me: "Aw man, we're catching every red robot. I hope we don't lose our table."
USA: "Every red what??"
Me: "Traffic light."

Funny how South African we really are. It was fun.

My mates, true troopers, welcomed the 3 with open arms and we showed them a LEKKER SOUTH AFRICAN JOL! We also discovered it was one of the guys 29th birthday so we gave him the sparkler stuck in ice-cream and Happy Birthday into Shosholoza birthday song!

It's a day I don't think they'll ever forget and they can now confidently say: Howzit! Lekker! Boet! Boerewors! and Sherbet (don't ask.) I feel that SA Tourism should pay me.

They're leaving next week, so I've offered to take them to the Lion Park, Lesedi Cultural village and Apartheid Museum.
The best part? I get to be a tourist in my own country ... I don't know who is more excited.

Heart Broken

2010-05-31T05:54:00.005+01:00

Heart broken. European Boy broke up with me and to be honest, I NEVER saw it coming.

We had what most people search for their whole lives and some never find it. We never stopped having fun together, never stopped laughing, we were supportive and kind and loving. Amazing chemistry, I can go on and on .... So where did it all go wrong?

I'm not entirely sure. Feel pretty shattered.

He says that he just can't make a relationship a priority and that he should have taken the time and space when he got out of his last serious relationship - he's been in one serious relationship since 19 (married at 21 and divorced at 25) and that he needs space ... that it's not fair I love him so much and make him my number 1 priority when he just can't make me his.... he says he just is not in the space where he knows who he is and what he wants in life and he doesn't know if he ever wants to get married again and that he'd be stringing me along.

The first thought and first question from most people is: Is there someone else?

And I can honestly say that it's a NO.

I think he is just incredibly confused and is throwing the best thing to ever happen to him away...

I deserve better.

I am strong, but I've taken it hard. Well, I have to carry on, put a smile on my face - can't exactly be weepy in the job I have ... and just be blessed that I have the most amazing friends and family :)

I heart Fashion

2010-05-18T08:15:00.004+01:00

Autumn into Winter ... I love this time of year purely for the fashion. Jackets, jeans, jerseys, shirts, boots, ankle boots, ballet pumps and most importantly ... accessories. I love chunky jewellery, hats, beanies, berets, scarves and even short square, dark nails ... *happy sigh*

In other news ... I've been in hospital again. Don't ask ... long story. Not fun. Drained and I just want to get to the bottom of this. So far I've had several specialists who are just as baffled as I am. Xrays say one thing and then when they go inside, it's suddenly not there.

I have become a medical mystery. I think I am an alien.

Anyone have House's number on speed dial??

Hormonal Cabin Fever.

2010-05-09T06:41:00.005+01:00

I had Left Out Syndrome last night ... well, I'm not sure I can call it that considering it was my decision to stay behind while all my mates were going to birthday parties, dinners and Paul Oakenfold.

I had a hospital procedure last Wednesday. I had to go under general anaesthetic and get prodded and poked etc ... Good times really...especially when the schedule 7 drugs kick in ;-)

European boy had bought us VIP tickets to Paul Oakenfold ages ago. Every part of me wanted to go but by the time we were ready to, my body decided to chicken out.

I don't know if I'm getting older and by that I mean more responsible, or if I'm just becoming lazier.

As a very torn European Boy hesitated at the door, I absolutely insisted that he went with the mates. Another thing I adore about him is how sweet his for insisting he stay behind and look after me. I felt guilty enough that I wasn't going - I didn't want to feel guilty for him not going too.

I am PMSing (read hormonal pain in the ass), feeling sorry for myself, feeling tender and fragile after the hospital procedure and just not really myself at the moment.

So there I was on the couch, with my laptop and my favourite fashion blogs, my book, drivel on TV and I suddenly had this: "I feel so sorry for myself ... Oh my gosh I'm missing out on fun." moment.

I wanted to jump up, get showered and dressed and go party. I had visions of arriving, looking chic and saying cooly:

"Ha ha - I was just kidding! I'm going to order a Jack & Lime, who wants one?"

I didn't though. Instead I sat looking at my phone semi-hoping for:

"It's just not the same without you."

and

"We're all having a miserable time and coming home." messages.

That didn't quite happen, either.

They say it's really good for you to have a night on your own. To enjoy your "me-time" and I am always down for those, because they are so few and far between.

However, this does NOT count when you are already climbing the walls from having Cabin Fever and having Cabin Fever during a hormonal time -is well...problematic.

I don't think anyone has ever been so excited to see a Mr. Delivery guy. When the doorbell rang, I jumped up and nearly hugged him - just for some human interaction. He gave me my food and walked away shaking his head.

I needed to find things to preoccupy my time.

Bare in mind, that since Wednesday I have been doing the same things every night. OK OK, to be fair, the only thing different was that I was at European Boys apartment and not mine....At least they were different walls to climb.

There was N.O.T.H.I.N.G on TV. Good grief. Oh wait. I did watch a cool movie...or was that Friday night? OK never mind, scratch that.

I watched the clock a lot. Ridiculous... and a little crazy, I'll admit it.

I re-checked blogs -just in case the bloggers had written a new post since the last hour I had checked.

I read Twitter and everyone tweeting about how amazing their Saturday nights were.

Made Hot chocolate.

Raided European Boy's cupboard for left over Easter Eggs. He's normally a hoarder like I am, but couldn't seem to hoard Easter eggs. Dammit.

I looked at friends photo's on Facebook.

I read a few chapters of my book.

I made Vanilla tea.

I got a message from European Boy and my heart sang with a ridiculous: "He does miss me!!" - even though I know that deep down. Being a hormonal girl at times can be the pits.

I must have eventually fallen asleep on the couch, because when I woke up again, all the lights were on, the TV was blaring with Discovery Channel's "I Shouldn't Be Alive" and when I looked next to me, European Boy was home, sweeping the hair off my face and eating pizza.

I vaguely remember him switching everything off eventually and steering me to bed. Thank goodness, because the last time I tried to go to bed myself when I was so sleepy, I nearly slept in the dining room.

Today is MOTHERS DAY ... My sister and I have a tradition that we make her breakfast/lunch/dinner and copious amounts of tea. We've been told that she is going to Yoga this morning (my mom's new thing now) - so we are going to make her brunch. I've become quite the cook lately, so I can't wait to show off...just a little. I love surprising mom.

My mom is the most amazing woman. I learn from her wisdom, her strength, her elegance, her grace, her zest for life and if I turn out to be just half the woman she is, I will be incredibly happy!

She has always been there. I cannot recall a time when I have been let down. She calls herself my "Number 1 Fan" and has been through every heart ache, hurt, success, dream, triumph and lesson. I couldn't be more blessed.

To all the mom's out there ... even if we don't say it often, we are exceptionally grateful for everything that you do.

HAPPY MOTHERS DAY!

A mothers love is the fuel that enables a normal human being to do the impossible." ~Marion C. Garretty

Brrrr....

2010-04-27T18:38:00.006+01:00

Freedom Day has left me cooped up indoors and taken hostage by my blanket, fluffy slippers and home made vegetable soup.

This weather had better just be a cold front and not be showcasing what is to come.

I know we've just entered Autumn and we're no where close to winter. Well, you could have fooled me.

OMG.

It's ice cold, I have steam coming from my lips as I talk and it hasn't stopped raining. Since when do we get rain at this time of the year? We certainly do not have rain during winter - we gratefully leave that for the Capetonians.

It seems Mother Nature just isn't happy - earthquakes, volcanic erruptions... Global Warming anyone?

2012 just doesn't seem so Hollywood movie-like anymore. Perhaps this Mayan Calendar should be studied a little more closely.

In other news, I have become quite the domesticated little you know what... Today, I made European Boy a hot breakfast and then I decided that I hadn't dirtied enough dishes so I made a fresh vegetable soup and when I eyed out the last clean dishes, I figured they wouldn't want to be left out, so I baked...chocolate chip cookies.

This weather is a problem. It makes me H.U.N.G.R.Y and while I know European Boy isn't complaining one bit...I know this because he has a stupid grin on his face and the biscuit crumbs are intwined in the blanket he keeps hogging ;) ... I on the other hand, look guiltily at my gym clothes that seem to be going deeper and deeper into my cupboard and veer towards the fridge and pantry that seem to have mystical powers over me.

I know I eventually have to leave the house, well... either my boss will fire me if I just don't pitch for work tomorrow or my stomach will start talking to me like it's possessed.

I am psyching myself up for work tomorrow. I am giving myself pep talks. I have to...I have an "itsy bitsy" GIGANTIC problem.

My Winter clothes, you know the ones that keep you warm and have fabric that cover the arms, well those are in storage at my parents.

"Hey mom!'

"Blogshell, how freezing is it? I can't do this weather."

"You're telling me? That's actually why I'm calling. You have all my winter things in boxes in the garage. I'm starting to resemble Smurfette, which was possibly cool in the 80's but not so much for me now."

"Shit."

"What do you mean 'shit'?"

"Well your father has been cleaning the garage to make space. You know I'm renovating my studio and so I've been putting all the things from those rooms into the garage. You can't actually get a person into the garage, let alone a car. I don't have any idea where your winter boxes are. I hope your dad didn't chuck them out."

"Super. Just super. Will you visit me when I'm dying from pneumonia?"

"Oh, don't be so dramatic."

"Will you check on me every few days to make sure that I have frozen stiff in my apartment?"

"Alright drama queen, I'll come and visit you and bring you one of my jackets. Put the kettle on for tea. See you now."

The bitter sweet news is that I am a little warmer when I do have to leave the house. I have one of my mother's jackets... with shoulder pads...that's in right? Right?

PS. Happy Freedom Day.

Autumn Clean

2010-04-15T17:08:00.002+01:00

Seriously need to Spring Clean.. Autumn Clean?

Problem? I'm a hoarder.
I luuuurve my things and I always feel like I might just need that purple sweater, that movie ticket stub (memories for that scrapbook I'll eventually get around to making) and that costume jewellry that's seen better days, but I have the best intensions to turn it into a brooch.
I need to be ruthless, but actually I need someone to do it for me and they need to be stern.
I need my own Sex and The City scene where we can sit in my apartment with Moet and my girls can say "Chuck" or "Keep."
Problem is, we would just chat too much, drink too much and before long we'd be wearing the Chuck pile and prance around to a blaring i-Pod.

I need a company like Clean House but in South Africa and preferably without the camera crew.
Don't get me wrong ... my place is clean and in an order, it's just that there is far too much of everything (in order.)

Are there companies out there? Seriously?
Blondie here is officially waving a white flag of hoarding surrender

5 more sleeps

2010-03-14T18:33:00.007Z

5 more sleeps and then European Boy and I take our first road trip together. I have never travelled more in the past year ... We have travelled to Knysna, Cape Town, Northern Province, to Mauritius and more... but we have never taken a road trip together and they say it can tell a lot. I must admit, I'm not worried, I'm excited.

I'm the nerd who is making playlists on my iPod called RoadTrip. I'm stocking up on food for our trip and looking for little places to stop at along the way.

We are travelling down for my "twins" beach wedding. It's amazing to think we have been friends for 9 years, we have been through University together, we've bought ice-cream for each others break-ups and shared several Dacquiri's, secrets and laughs together.... Strangely enough, I knew her and her fiance individually ... Both amazing people. 2 and a bit years ago when I met her for our monthly breakfast I could see there was something up. She was giggly and glowing. The obvious next question was: "Who is he?"

When she told me, it was PERFECT. I couldn't imagine a better man for my friend ... They are the perfect match!

I even remember saying: "Friend, watch... you mark my words.... you guys are so meant for each other just by knowing you both individually...You're going to marry him!"

In 6 more sleeps that is exactly what she'll be doing and I couldn't be more thrilled.

She's having it on the beach... I've never been to a beach wedding and actually it's something I've always imagined I would do one day, for my own wedding.

I'm really excited.

European Boy and I have also extended our time down there and we plan to have a weeks holiday.

I seriously need it. It's been a hectic year so far... no complaints, but it's still hectic.

Feeling drained and I know the salty sea breeze, the sand between my toes and the melodic sound of the ocean is exactly what I need to recharge my spirit.

This is the very view we will be sipping sundowners to.... 5 more sleeps...

Hooker at #19

2010-03-03T20:31:00.005Z

I'm a friendly girl, I have no qualms about meeting people, even randomly greeting strangers walking through a shopping mall and so on. When I moved into my new complex, I was rather excited about meeting my new neighbors. I kind of imagined my neighbors would all be twenty-something, fun people. I imagined parties at our super cool clubhouse, knocking on each others doors because we were out of sugar...kidding, more like: Jack Daniels or Lime...or both.

When I was moving my furniture in I thought for sure people would come out their doors and introduce themselves as my new neighbor. I may have even hoped for a basket of muffins. Bree from Desperate Housewives would have. I'm just saying.

My lovely neighbor in the unit next to me introduced herself. She's lovely. The only friendly one but we happen to have very different schedules. She's gone when I'm home and I can only imagine it must be vice versa. Great. Thank you Murphy.

Then there are 2 units above me. I was rather excited to meet them....So far, I was right about my complex - all young and hopefully fun.

A few weeks went by and finally I managed to see some life forms. I met the guy who lives above me. Nice guy, friendly, in his twenties. Finally. These parties could possibly happen. He shares the same name as my boyfriend. Handy, especially because I really am useless when it comes to peoples names.

Two days later I see him with his live-in girlfriend.

"Hello same-name! Hello!" I say to him and to her.

Weird. Do I have the right person?

Yes, definitely. He's not friendly, instead he can hardly look at me, gives me a shy smile and almost looks like she's going to crunch his balls when they're in private for even acknowledging me. She grunts at me, gives me the dirtiest look ever and off they disappear up the stairs.

WTF?

Oooo-kay!

BUT the next time I saw him (sans the eye-balling grunter) he was all waves and smiles.

I think I've figured it out though. I think the word has spread. My neighbors think I am a high class hooker. Now, before you all gasp, let me explain.

I was asked (honoured) to be a part of this prestigious charity ball. I was asked to be one of the people who would showcase a designers dress. We were allocated designers and they had to take our measurements, do dress fittings etc.

I had very limited time to do this, so I asked to meet my designer for the first time at my home because I just couldn't make it to his studio.

He arrived at about noon. He has quite an unconventional way of measuring. Sure, he measures standardly with a measuring tape, but then he asks you to stand in hot pants and a strappy tank top. He cling wraps you and makes a "cast" of your body shape. Pretty amazing.

Amazingly BOILING...Murphy was having fun again - it just happened to be the hottest day of the year. I tried to look at the bright side ... this was a weight loss opportunity. So while he wrapped away, I sweated away. By the time he cut the wrap off me, I was dripping. I didn't want to put on my clothes straight away (ewww) so instead, I put on my silk robe that I have had forever and a day. I wear it all the time. I adore it. Hindsight, is a beautiful thing isn't it? I could have grabbed a loose fitting dress, but I went for my comfort.

I walked my designer to his car in my robe. I didn't think anything of it. Who was home during the week at noon? I then gave him a hug good bye and said: "That was really awesome and it was nice to meet you. So, same time next week?"

See how that would sound? It would have sounded totally normal if it was just between my fully-dressed designer and my silk robe wearing self. Instead, it was with all my new neighbours, yes, all those who I hadn't met yet. Those who I was starting to wonder if they existed. They had all come home for their lunch break. I obviously didn't get the memo.

So yes, there they are gawking at me in the middle of the day in a silk robe walking a man who was fully dressed to his car, giving him a hug, telling him it was great to meet him and asking if this is all happening again same time next week. Awesome.

No wonder the men are friendly when their girlfriends aren't around and the girls look at me like I'm the female version of Tiger Woods.

Love the reputation.

Perhaps I will get my party ... my farewell party when I move one day.

Fat Day

2010-02-18T16:24:00.003Z

I am having such a fat day that I feel like blob with legs and arms. In fact I am like one muffin top with a mouth.
Argh. My jeans that fitted yesterday seem to have shrunk overnight. I was yanking and pulling and jumping and huffing and puffing and heaving myself into these jeans and finally managed to close the button. My neighbours must have thought I was having the most amazing sex ever.
If only they knew. LOL.

WTF is going on? Ok, so Special K my amazing mate who has a body to die for and is a fitness guru has very kindly taken me under her wing.
Yes, I lost 10kgs last year. However, I cannot seem to shake the last 10kgs and the thought of having to do this all again is just exhausting. See, I don't function like normal human beings. Normal human beings would be so chuffed and motivated that they had lost 10kgs that they would continue on the journey to lose the last 10kgs. Normal human beings would look at it like: I lost 10kgs, I can do it all over again.
I, on the other hand, am clearly not normal.
I am on a strict, clean eating plan and exercise plan.

I have the worst sinus so gym has fallen by the way side for the time being, which is frustrating me to no ends. I actually want to train. I've been told it's an 80-20 ratio. 80% eating and 20% exercise, so I figured that while I can't exercise I can at least get the 80% right. I have been eating all the right things, cut out fizzy drinks and crisps (my vices) and really thought that by 2 weeks I would feel and see a difference.
Nope.
Perhaps its because I'm as bloated as a ...I'm not actually sure what...
It's PMS, if you know what I'm saying.
It's lack of endorphines from the lack of gyming.

I've had it. I'm hoping tomorrow will be a gorgeous, skinny, fabulous day and if not. I'm going back to bed.

Drowning in my bath...

2010-02-17T21:08:00.003Z

I'm renting this gorgeous little apartment. It is truly the cosiest and most comfortable place. It has a personality as far as walls and windows go... and I almost wish it was actually mine. I rent from the most divine landlords - they live in London, trust me implicitly- which helps, and are so easy going.

There are only a few problems with it...

The place is absolutely tiny. In reality, I don't need any more space for right now...although I could always do with more closet space...but then again, which girl ever has enough?

I am yet to have a housewarming because it would mean that I would be having a housewarming ever single weekend for the rest of my lease. I can fit maybe 3 people in at a time. Awkward.

It only has one sink, which can be a pain in the ass when it comes to washing and rinsing dishes. One day when I'm big, I would like to not slosh soapy water all over the floor...in fact, one day when I'm big, I will have space for a dishwasher.

My main problem is it only has a bath. Showering and bathing are personal preferences for people. Some people love to only bath...*teach me* ... I do not fall into that category. I am a shower person. Don't get me wrong...I love baths...on occasions, like when I've had a really tough work out and I need to soak my achy muscles or I get a rare one in a million chance to take some "me-time" and pamper myself in a vanilla bubble bath with candles, Michael Buble and a bottle of wine. Bathing everyday is not ideal for me.

It especially makes for interesting conversation when I say things like: "Oh my God. I can't remember the last time I took a shower!!"

People tend to turn their noses up to comments like that. I seriously miss showering. I can't handle the idea of soaking in "dirt" and then when I get out of the bath water it just clings to my skin again...ewwww. I need to rinse myself off and step out clean and fresh.

I also think of the environment, believe it or not, and it is better to shower. I feel bad every time I run a bath.

I emailed my landlords and asked them if I could restructure their bathroom by putting up a shower rail and curtain (not the sexiest thing, I know) and attachment etc etc to turn the bath into a mini shower. They happily agreed and even (bless them) told me they would pay for it. I'm so desperate at this stage I was prepared to pay for everything, even plumbing if need be. Still, it would've been a little rude to do my merry little adjustments when the place isn't mine.

European Boy has recently moved into a 5 x the size of my little matchbox (said with love) apartment and he is fixing certain things up...one being his bathroom with mustard coloured walls. Whoever the previous owners were should be shot for shocking taste.

I've learnt quite a bit about housey-things ... like tiles, and underfloor heating and damp proofing and so forth. Including a better more aesthetically pleasing solution of changing a bath into a shower. It's a mini glass door that gets attached to the bath. Much better. Much better than having a shower curtain stick to you and the feeling that Pyscho could be standing there with a Butchers knife.

I got this company to come give me a quote. Firstly they ended up getting lost because my complex (4-5 years old) is still not in the map books or GPS systems. Story of my life when I get cold Nandos and Mr. Delivery.

They took the measurements and were gone. I waited 3 hours for them to be there for no more than 5 minutes. The kettle was still boiling for tea by the time they were finished up.

I have the quote, not too bad actually... and I'm sending it off to London. I think it's a little more than a shower curtain and rail, but I'm thinking of them for future reference when it comes to resale value.... Aren't I just such a good little tenant?

Noddy Badge.

Although...I am just assuming that they're going to see my logic and go this route. I'm hoping so. If I have to dunk my shampoo lathered head under water one more time, I may try to drown myself.

Happy Valentines Day

2010-02-14T14:56:00.005Z

I love love. That feeling that oozes out, those tingles and I'm happy to say that I still feel this way after all these months - 11 to be exact. How long is the honeymoon phase supposed to last?

I'd like to think it doesn't have to end and so far I'm testament to that.

Perhaps I've become one of those nauseating couples. The "get-a-room" couple. Although, in public we're pretty well behaved.

I made breakfast in bed this morning. Cheesy scrambled egg and bacon. I tried to cut the toast into heart shapes but that became bird food and I had to toast more bread. I received a gorgeous bunch of roses and a little teddy on a stick peeking out of the roses. The card is always sentimental to me. Words are so powerful.

I had planned for us to have a picnic. I even bought a proper picnic blanket and basket for goodness sake. Well I woke up to rain, so those plans went out the window when I saw the weather. How crap. Although, it ended up being awesome - didn't get out bed at all. There is something about rainy weather and cuddling.

Are you nauseous yet? No. Good. Let me continue then.

Where did I find him? He booked Valentines Day Dinner a month ago. Apparently you can't get a booking at this restaurant on any ordinary day, let alone a special occasion, so he got in early. What man thinks about V day a month ago, let alone plans anything? See why I'm keeping him?

I still don't know where I'm going, all I know is that I have to be ready by 8pm and I have to wear something smart.

Oh, you look a little green around the gills. Alright, I'm going to stop now...

Happy Valentines Day sexy people ... Hope you're being as spoilt as I am and if not, well, spoil yourself. Nothing like some self loving ;-)

Adopt a Granny

2009-10-02T10:29:00.005+01:00

I want to adopt her as my granny. I want to bottle her and sell her. I'm talking about this lovely, FEISTY 69 year old (love her age) that works at the company I work at in the mornings (thank you flexi-hours.)
She is modern but old school and takes no nonsense let me tell you, but she is just full of fun and doesn't miss a beat. She knows exactly what is going on with who, but has avoided being labelled as a busy body. I love that she isn't afraid to say what she thinks. It's wonderful. She would be a script writers dream for any movie with her one liners and sharp remarks.
She has this cackle that is so wicked that every time I hear it, I can't help but laugh too. Completely contagious. My God she is a feisty little thing. I just adore her.
The stories she has told me have made me, the 26 year old with a few stories of my own, blush. Good grief.

She lives in a retirement village and tells me about her garden that she is totally in love with and how all the old grandpa's always come by to visit and she's not interested. I told her that she just can't help it if she's a little minx.
"Oooh I'm not."
"Yes you are. Clearly you are, if you are getting all those old mens blood pressure up! You little vixen you!"
and out comes her contagious cackle.

She has a better social life than I do and is constantly going out for dinners and dancing and cups of tea at her other friends in the retirement village. She goes for walks and adores shoes. I guess some things never change in that girly department.

She told me a story about her late second husband that I cannot not laugh at when I think about it. She met him in her 50's after her divorce and as they started dating, she said she was nervous to enter the bedroom. *As she is telling me this, she raises her eyebrows up and down* and so she would put it off. Eventually one night, she told him that she didn't know where he'd been so he had better not think about doing anything without protection. She calls condoms French Letters. Bless.
So out came the French Letters and when she saw them, she started laughing.
"Why on earth do you have Rough Riders? Oh no... you can turn those inside out and give yourself a thrill!"

I just wish I could record the way she explains stories. She has a no-nonsense shrill voice with a cheeky manner and yet she has unbelievable charm. When I first met her I was petrified. On my first day that I walked into the office she came out and demanded: "And? Who are you and what are you doing here?"
Talk about intimidating.

I love her to pieces. She makes me look forward to coming into work each morning. What a character!

She adores watching this new season of Strictly Come Dancing on BBC and if you could hear her perve over the male dancers, well, I blush almost every day.
I constantly tease her about it and how she had better keep her blood pressure medication on stand-by and her response is always classic: "Oh Blondie, I'm not dead you know. My eye sight is just fine to look at the "menu", thank you very much! Oh you should should see the way he moves those hips ... Oooooh ... what a thrill!"

I want to gobble her up she is just too cute.

Talking to her makes me really miss my Gran too.

I've always hated the idea of getting old and wrinkly, but she makes me look forward to it. There is something about her and what a little gem she is.

No pain; no gain....apparently

2009-09-22T10:35:00.005+01:00

Man oh man. I try, I really do. I just can't seem to get back into the blogging lifestyle, but if you wanna bear with me, then there will be a post every now and then. Might as well be honest about it.

News? Plenty.
I have moved into my little matchbox and I adore it. I had no problems of settling in and it felt like home immediately. It's my little haven that I can relax in and it is just super cosy.
I will have to take photo's and post them one day.

I haven't had a housewarming because every weekend is pretty much out. I have so much going on. I looked at my calendar the other day and the first weekend that I will have to myself is the first weekend of November. Hectic.

This weekend I am going to Sin City for Spring Break. I have never been...to Spring Break, I mean. Apparently it's one massive concert/party vibe in the evening and during the day you chill out at Valley of the Waves sun-tanning and playing with the water slides. Should be good.

European Boy and I are awesome. I'm madly in love, really happy and I'm excited...he's taking me away to Mauritius in November. Yes. It's always been a dream of mine to go to a Tropical island. I am getting a dream come true. I can't wait for the Turquoise waters, white sandy beaches and plenty of sunshine, snorkelling, pina coladas and utter relaxation.

Have you noticed how all the things that are coming up involve something that I shudder about.
B-I-K-I-N-I.
I actually have to go bikini shopping today because I don't know what has happened to mine. I swear there have to be "Moving Gremlins" ... so many of my things have disappeared from the move. Odd.

Why couldn't I have stuck to my winter gym routine so that I wouldn't be a whale...a lily white one to be exact? Oh wait. I got sick in winter and couldn't continue the gym routine. Bloody hell.

I am officially back though. I have moved to a new gym that is 5 minutes from my house. NO EXCUSES. I've started doing Spinning Classes at... wait for it ... 05:15. Yes. In the morning.
I know!!

I also bumped into my old personal Trainer. The gentle GIANT. He has muscles on top of muscles and looks like a mean muscle machine, but he is the gentlest, kindest, sweetest man. I went to him about 4 years ago for a month and he transformed my body (not completely, but for 1 month it was remarkable) however, he then moved to another gym and I couldn't continue with him.
I was so thrilled to see him. So now I am going to him every other day at 6am for an hour session.

I am determined to have a toned body. I'm sick of complaining about it. I've started eating right and exercising and I am certainly going to give myself a proper shot.
Why do I feel like I've heard this all before?
Oh yes. I try this each year. Here is hoping that it will actually work. Hell, if I can stop smoking cold turkey, then I surely have enough willpower to do this. Hell, if I have enough will power to be on the seat of the bicyle at 05:15 then I don't know.

Wish me luck.

Now for the part that I have really been putting off thinking about, let alone writing about.

The De-fuzzing Down There.
I wish I could shave - tried that - itched like hell when it grew back. Just saying. TMI? Sorry.
I'm allergic to hair removal creams. I found out the fun, hard way.
So what other option do I have?
To pour gooey hot stuff all over and rip the &*%$#@! out of me. Awesome.

Guess what I have scheduled at 2pm today? YAY for me!! Not only do I have to get into a ... *shudder* .... bikini... *shudder*.... this weekend but I also really don't want to look like the chick from Scary Movie ... you know the scene where he needs a weed-whacker. Nice.

I am not really a fan of pain. Never have been. So there's that and the fact that some stranger (I don't care that she has seen hundreds and does this all the time or the fact that she is female) is going to part my legs and wax me.
I mean, is there a code out there like there is for doctors and pyschiatrists? Thou shalt not discuss clients at weekend parties?
God I hope so.
I mean I don't know how that topic could ever come up, but hey...stranger things have happened. Right?
Beautician to mates: "Damn - you should have seen this one cookie I was waxing...."
Ok. That would be weird. I don't know if I would like to hear that from my beautician friends.

I really cannot believe that at 2pm today Im going to be gripping the side of the bed and biting pillows. Hopefully the bikini shopping won't be as painful.

Wish me luck.

I'm gonna brush that move right out of the colour charts

2009-08-27T15:23:00.004+01:00

It's called a toothbrush. Use it. Preferably with toothpaste. I'm not even going to push it when it comes to flossing and mouth wash.
I have never come across more halitosis in one day in my life. Every. single. person I met had halitosis. It was so bad that I nearly gagged, had to take a few steps back, hold my breath and turn my head as if I was fascinated with something that was to my left, while still trying to seem as if I was listening to what they were saying.
I had a business meeting with a man who probably had small animals die in his mouth. That one was a little trickier to try and avoid. Especially when I had to lean in to see the document he had.
I then had to go to a few stores and of course I needed help in each store. Ok, let me be exact. There 5 stores. 5 salesmen. All 5 had terrible breath.

I know that some people have conditions, but I also know that it is impossible for me to encounter 6 men on one day.
No. Brush, floss, gargle. Do it.
How do these people get laid?

Just a thought.

In other news and I know I'm getting annoying now, but seriously, I am tingling I am so excited. I cannot WAIT to move. This weekend, I am sanding and staining some furniture I have had in storage. On Monday we paint my apartment - oh good grief - that reminds me, I still haven't chosen a colour. Seriously. How many bloody natural colours can there be? There is cloud white, vanilla white, off white, cream white, angelic white, cognac cream, Grecian White, Pearl...the list goes on and on. I am undecided between a neutral colour called Jasmine something or other; Light Clay or Velvet Cream.
No. You can't choose from the names alone, other wise I would have an apartment that is painted in colours called: Petite and Perfect (there really is a colour called that AND it's all about positive affirmation, so if my apartment was petite and perfect perhaps I could be too ) or it would be Fairy Dust or Sugar Shack or the Passion Pit. Yes. These are all legit colours.
I am useless. I need someone to close their eyes and wiggle their finger over the page with the colours I've chosen and pick one.
Anyway - so on Monday, the colour will be picked and on my wall and then on Tuesday SPRING DAY, I will move all my furniture in. I have so many different furniture companies coming through and I hope they all arrive before 3pm.
I cannot wait. I seriously cannot wait.

PS> 2 and a half months of no smoking and going strong. Feel fab!

I am going to be a toned and skinny ROCK STAR!

2009-08-23T09:03:00.005+01:00

I'm starting a band. I'm preparing myself for the rockstar life that I know will be mine soon. I'm going to have to start getting used to the adoring fans, the throwing of underwear and the cramped hands from all the autograph signing.
I know it will be tough on the road, but *sigh* someone's gotta do it.
I played Guitar Hero and the drum kit for Guitar Hero like a rockstar. After every song the TV screen yelled out: YOU ROCK!!
I know, I know. Why be modest when you are pure brilliance?
Hahahahahaha!

What a jol! On Saturday night European Boy and I went over to the helicopter buddies for pizza and Guitar Hero. It was ridiculous how funny everyone is when they play. People stick their tongues out, their brows furrow, they squint their eyes and some even stop breathing...all in concentration. Oh and heaven help you if you dare cross in front of the TV screen. Lesson learnt ;-)
We had someone on the mic singing, someone on bass, someone on the guitar and someone on drums. It was very "rock and roll." I loved it.

In other news. Special K is killing me. I know that I will thank her but in the mean time I curse her, I huff and puff and I glare at her with the "why do you hate me so much?" sentiment.
According to her (and I quote): "By the time I am finished with you, Blondie, I will be able to crack eggs on your ass!"
She is my personal trainer, dietician and support system to lose 12 kgs and become toned and fabulous.
I have had enough. Sure, I lost a lot of weight from no emotional eating, going to gym etc... but it's not enough and I feel like I should be in my prime especially being in my mid twenties. The reality is, I'm not getting any younger and each second that passes, maintaining a figure gets harder and harder. I need to get a figure first and then try to maintain it.
I am a little scared to be honest and I'm nervous, because it is a lot of dedication and committment, but I am motivated and I really wanna do this. If I can stop smoking cold turkey after a pack a day for 8 years, then I am stronger than I think and have amazing will power to do anything I set my mind to.
I sound like I'm trying to convince myself more than you. You're probably right. Baby steps.
I have started a food journal, which actually really helps. I've read in Shape Magazine and other articles etc that keeping a food journal helps. I never really "got that" until now. I also train so hard at gym that the idea of putting a cheeseburger in my mouth afterwards kind of makes me feel like all that gym would have been a waste, so why bother.
I really want to do this properly, once and for all...so that I can maintain it. I'm doing this for myself and yes, let's be honest, my career too. Let's see how it goes. :-)

A week and a bit then and you want me to pay HOW MUCH??

2009-08-20T15:12:00.005+01:00

OMG. I had a beautiful little wake up call. So did my bank balance. Ha! Balance means you are actually savvy with money and have savings and stuff.

As excited as I am to be moving and thankfully I have a lot of stuff in storage, I still need to get a whole lot of new things. I ordered my cuppaccino suede L-shape couch and my dark wood furniture. I bought the matching kettle and toaster in it's silver finish. I bought the silver, mirrored microwave and other kitchen items. I expected these to be somewhat costly.
I did not expect these things to be expensive:
Bath sheets, hand towels, curtains and blinds, linen, duvet covers, pillow cases etc.
I did not choose Egyptian cotton with thread count blah blah blah ... I got ordinary white duvet covers and pillow cases..... from Sheet Street.
I did not budget for these things being so expensive. Imagine my surprise when you're taking items for R89 and R199 etc and handing them over to get a final bill of R1895.99. Say what???
It just goes to show that the small things really can add up.

It's getting closer now and I can't wait. So much to do. I also am a hoarder. I have tried over the years to change that and I have given up...given in? to the fact that it's never going to change. However, it has to change because my new apartment is so tiny that if anything is out of place or stacked up the place will look like a tornado ripped through it.
I have collected and built up so many things that there is no way I have space for everything.
I heard what you said. So be brutal and chuck things out. Surely you don't need everything.
How can you swear at me like that?
I do need everything and I can't bare to throw things away in case I may need it down the line. Oh good grief. This is why I need my girlfriends. We need to create my own version of The Style Networks: Clean House

All I know is that it's a week and a bit and then I have my independance back. I also know that I have a bottle of Moet champagne that is eagerly awaiting the move too.

Changes ...

2009-08-17T16:01:00.006+01:00

Can you smell it? Can you feel it?

Ok maybe not entirely, but you know that Spring is just around the corner. Alright, to be perfectly honest all I can really feel is how dry and frizzy my hair is, how those static shocks hurt and how dry my skin is that I look half woman-half reptile.

I have noticed how some trees are starting to blossom and how the weather is shyly warming up. I had 2 braai's this weekend and I didn't have to pull on a jersey once.

There are two things that I always freak out about though.

a) I am so lily white that I may blind anyone who isn't wearing sunglasses.

b) those layers of clothes come off to expose the layer of "blubber" I fondly called my layer of warmth.

There would actually normally be 3 things ... the third would have been that I would need an industrial strength razor to deforest my legs because *again* I fondly called them my "layer of warmth home grown stockings."

My legs have been silky smooth all.winter.long. Thanks to my relationship with European Boy. 'Nuff said.

OK no wait. They haven't been silky smooth all.winter.long. They have been silky smooth all for a few hours after I've shaved them (I'm not a fan of waxing. My legs, that is. Go figure) until I got cold, got goosebumps and then instantly had chicken flesh legs. God it pisses me off.

I have a LOT of changes coming up. All happening ON Spring Day.

I am moving into my fabulous, tiny bachelorette pad that has a little garden. I love gardens and while this may be tiny, I can't wait to sit on the patio in the sunshine and watch the birds.

Good grief. I sound like I'm 80. LOL

I can't wait to decorate and just have MY OWN space. I adore my family and I'm so grateful that I was able to move back 8 months ago after the breakup, but I really do need my independance and after running my own household for 4 years (my way) it has been difficult going back to living under "mom and dad's house rules."

An element of my job is also changing on the 01 September which is bitter sweet. It is exciting and sad at the same time. It's going to be quite an adjustment.

These are a few things that I'm looking forward to about summer:

Ice tea's and cocktail sundowners with my girlfriends.

Picnics.

Watermelon.

Salads and fruit salads.

Ice cream.

Pool Parties.

Summer dresses and slops.

Bronzed skin.

Cabriolets.

Sunsets.

Leaving my hair to dry naturally because this time the haridryer will be too hot, instead of welcoming! LOL.

A green city again. I'm over the drab brown.

The smell of suntan lotion.

I can't wait.

RIP

2009-08-02T09:01:00.004+01:00

So yes Anonymous, my blog has become boring and has grown a fair amount of cobwebs, but shitloads has been happening. Twitter is easier. Just saying.

Yesterday was officially some "me time" ... something that I took for granted, never appreciated and now that I never get any, I miss it.
I finally had some time off, so I decided to go and get my hair done. Boy did it need it. My regrowth was so bad I was starting to look like Charlize Theron in Monster. I hate regrowth. It doesn't matter how clean your hair is; you still look like you haven't washed it in weeks. I sat in the chair excited for my hairdresser to make me blonde and beautiful. I love getting my hair done. I especially love my hair being washed and the head massages I get at the basin and on the chair for treatments. Pure Bliss. Why oh why though can I NEVER get my hair to look exactly the same as they did it? I buy the products they use, I have my life saving what-would-I-do-without-it ghd hair straightner and yet it never looks as sleek and professional?
Anyway...I'm just setting the scene. It's a Saturday, the salon is crazy busy and while I'm getting the head massage my phone starts to ring. I ignore it. I felt strange doing so and put it down o the fact that I'm not used to switching off and having "me time."
It rang again. I left it.

Eventually I couldn't take it anymore...my curiosity was strong and my gut feeling stronger. It was Special K.
Special K and I have a very strong bond. I have heard Oscar winning performances from her and it hasn't fooled me. I know when she is upset.
"Hi Blondie!"
"Hi. What's wrong?"
"Babe. I have some bad news. Are you sitting down?"
"Oh my God. What? You're freaking me out. What is it?"
She went on to tell me the news. I think the world stood still. Hair dryers became mute in my world, people froze in time and my heart sank.
A friend of ours had died that morning. The Cancer took our 32 year old amazing friend. He had fought for so long, had painful chemo sessions, operations and..... my heart broke. My heart broke even more for his fiance. I can't imagine what she must be going through.
We only find out a week prior that there was no hope anymore. That we would be lucky to have him in our lives until September. I have been battling with that news the whole week and to get that call from Special K broke me.
I could NOT stop crying at Jeauval. I felt mildly embarrassed because people were staring and mumbling to each other if I was OK. Strange how very few people came over to ask me. I could hear everyone talking and muttering, but it was like I had this invisible force field around me. Odd thing to notice too. I know.
They curled my hair and made me beautiful, but my face was red and blotchy with grey traces of mascara streaming down. My poor hairdresser gave me a serviette and a hug and I struggled to pull myself together.

I felt selfish too for internalizing this and making it about me....not entirely, but I hope you know what I mean when I say this.
It hit me really hard because he was diagnosed with the same cancer I was 3 months. The only difference? I caught mine early, had it cut out and now watch myself life a hawk. He was not so lucky.

RIP my wonderful, funny, warm, amazing friend. I really miss you and I wish I had more of an effort. 13 June 1977 - 01 August 2009.

It sucks that things like this highlight things that should NEVER be taken for granted. The special people in your life, life itself and always appreciating the things we have.

I don't really know what to say. I am crying typing this and I think I'm gonna stop now.

321...split personalities.

2009-07-18T15:27:00.005+01:00

This is my 321 post. I guess it's not really a special significant number, I just liked that it was 3-2-1.
Random. I know.

I have been one complete yo-yo of late. It's like the schizo personalities have finally taken over. Or at least just one, other than me, Blondie.
Shutup.
You shutup.
See?

One part of me has been completely sane and the other part of me has gone insane.
This week I decided that since the no smoking was going really well (oh and I'm relieved the other personality doesn't like smoking either...something we're in sync with) that I would up it a notch and try and get back into eating well and my regular exercise routine with my mate, Sugar.
Sure, I was sick and had early meetings etc, but there really is no excuse now. Especially with Spring looming. And speaking of, oh my goodness, I'm excited for Winter to hibernate. I can't take the static shocks any more, and my jokes of: "It's the electricity between us" and "Did you feel that? We have a spark!" when I touch people and shock the shit out them is losing it's humour. The static frizz that's called my hair and the scaly legs that no amount of exfoliating or body butter helps is driving me nuts. I also can't handle having to put sunglasses on everytime I undress and see my naked lily white body.
And that would be lumpy body. Where did that cellulite come from? Is it an age thing or was it that extra helping of pasta Alfredo in the cold weather?
Hell no.
Gym it is. At 7am when it's been 5 degrees.
Yes. I know.
Desperate measures my friends. Sugar has also turned into quite the drill sergeant too.
I will sweat my ass off on the spinning bike or while I'm doing weights, whatever and then straight after gym, evil; unhealthy personality kicks in and craves cheeseburgers and chips (with vinegar) or chocolates. Mainly chocolates.
Bar Ones, Lunch Bars, Kit-Kats, Top Deck slabs, Tex bars, oh my, you name it, it's been devoured.
It's disgusting.
WTF? I mean seriously. You'd think that after all the torture I put myself through, I'd feel all "rah-rah-let's go!" and opt for a health sandwich or salad. Nope. "Hand me that chocolate bar. Now!" and "Yes please. I'd love that extra slice on cheesecake dribbled with strawberries!" come out of my mouth.
This horrible unhealthy personality is strong. She almost always wins.

Must find a way to banish her and quick before Spring comes around and lumpy, lily-white Blondie here has to take off the layers of clothes we've been hiding under.

OMG. See that above? I just referred to myself as "we."
This is not good.

In other news: I found an apartment. I am so bloody excited that I turned instantly into the jumping up and down, squealing girl from those American Teen Movies. I get to do house shopping now and I love house shopping. I love looking for furniture and photo frames and quirky salt and pepper shakers etc. Sigh. This is exciting.

I'm BACK!!.... sort of....

2009-06-29T09:43:00.007+01:00

Wow. I'm super embarrassed. I haven't blogged in over a month. That is disgusting.

I have been ridiculously busy and haven't had much time to blog. I blame Twitter, which has kind of taken over really, because it's like microblogging. I can "blog" automatically as to what is happening, rather than sitting down and trying to write everything thats been going on in one piece.
I'm making terrible excuses aren't I?
I'm sorry.

I am still apartment hunting. I am ready to gargle with glass, put toothpicks through my eyeballs...ANYTHING, to find the perfect place.
Perhaps I am a cheapskate, but I am struggling to find something in my price range. I just cannot afford anything more. That doesn't mean, however, that I will accept living in a flea, cockroach-infested, dangerous and ridiculously small place.

The search is driving me crazy though. Seriously.

Let me give you an idea. I have tried Private Properties, Gumtree, every other search site available....I'll be here forever if I have to name them all...but feel free to send me more... I have tried Fourways Review and Sandton Chronicle.
Get the idea?

I have also been really busy career wise. It's strange though, because I feel like I am in a career rut. I feel like I should be doing more in my line of work and challenging myself more and yet I'm not quite sure what to do. LOL. I'm sure that it's just a phase. Let's hope so.

I am also madly in love. I haven't felt "this" before either. It's scary. A good scary. I am ridiculously happy; I can't wipe the silly grin off my face and I get butterflies everytime I think about him or see him. Today is actually our 3 months together (officially.)
I've never been treated like this before and I could kick myself actually. Every woman deserves to be treated like a queen. No settling, no excuses and no compromises. Why do we allow men to treat us badly? I look at my friends and my sister...I expect the men they are with to treat them like gold and I will say as much....I don't know why I never applied that to myself.
I can only say this because of the awful experience I went through. So everything for a reason, no regrets and huge lessons learnt. I can only appreciate the good, because I experienced the bad.

What else has been happening? Ooooh a BIGGIE! I have quit smoking. Today is actually Day 15 of no smoking, not one drag. Nothing. I have also done this cold turkey and to be completely honest, I have gobsmacked MYSELF. It's not that I didn't think I could do it; but at the same time, I didn't! LOL. Does that make any sense whatsoever?

I'm totally proud of myself. It also wasn't planned. This is what happened. After my Cancer scare, I knew that I needed to quit. I'd also been wanting to quit for a while, but in all honesty, I really enjoyed smoking for the social aspects and having something to do when I was bored etc etc...all the excuses under the sun. I had been saying for ages that I was going to quit...next month...next week....next Monday and so it went. I also got one hell of a fright when I actually worked out how long I have been smoking for. I don't know why (in my mind) I thought I had only been smoking for "two years"...I've been saying that forever. I've actually been smoking since 2001. A box of 2o a day for 8 years. On weekends (with alcohol) 2 boxes in a night. DISGUSTING.

On Sunday 14th June I had half a cig. Half a cig, because I just really didn't enjoy the taste of it. Perhaps it's because I had smoked nearly 2 boxes the Saturday night before with all the alcohol I consumed (haha) but I just didn't enjoy it. I stubbed it out and didn't smoke for the rest of the evening. That Monday morning I woke up and didn't even think about a cigarette. I went for breakfast and a movie with EB and when it was time for me to go to work it hit me that I hadn't had a single cigarette. I wish I could say that I was struck by an angel singing "Aaaaah" epiphany, but something inside me and inside my mind just snapped. It's like my mind shifted and I just decided to stop or at least to see if I could. Hours turned into days and weeks. I can't even use a glass of wine as an excuse because while the craving is strongest when I'm drinking a cocktail, it's so manageable.

I almost feel guilty because I know that stopping smoking is supposed to be horrific and a major struggle for people, but I have found it relatively easy. I'm not going to lie and say that I haven't struggled, because I have and I've eaten SHITLOADS of sour worms, but it hasn't been as hectic as I was expecting. I was expecting to crawl the walls, to have night sweats, to see everything as cigarettes and to be a royal bitch to anything that moved, but it just wasn't the case. It hasn't been that awful and perhaps it really and truly is ALL IN THE MIND.

Man I hate cliches, but you can't fault them.

I have become one of those ex smokers. I am annoying. I'll admit it. I can't handle the smell of smoke now. It freaks me out, it makes me sneeze and I actually hate waking up in the morning (if I've been in a smokey place) smelling of smoke. My hair and my clothes STINK of it and I just wonder WHY I never noticed it before. I am noticing that I can smell my perfume, that my clothes still smell like Sta-soft hours after I've had them on and my taste has changed. Everything is tasting delicious. I had a curry at Bukhara in Cape Town on Friday night and the spices were even better than I ever remember.

The downside? I got sick the day after I stopped smoking. It was a combination of this God-awful strain of Flu and my sinuses acting up from...get this...the lack of smoking. My doctor explained that when you stop smoking, the hairs in your nose and lungs start to move and shake off the tar, nicotine or whatever gunk it is. It starts to come up (this is attractive) and so people cough, blow their noses and so forth... The perception is: "I was healthier when I smoked!" but it's not actually the case...if you can bare with it for a few weeks, you'll realise your body is just rejuvinating and that you're getting healthy...damn cliches....you have to get worse to get better. Most people can't stand it and so they just start smoking again.

Screw that idea....I'm not going to go through this sneezing, coughing, sinus-y mission to pick up a cigarette and then have to go through it AGAIN when I wanna stop smoking AGAIN! I'm going to go through this ONCE. Sure, it hasn't been as difficult as I expected it to be, but with that said, it's still been a struggle (a personal one) and I would be so F*%`^ed off with myself if I crumbled and had a drag. Just saying.

So, yes. Day 15. Here's hoping that it long continues.

I'm going to do my best to blog more often. I mean look at this essay...woah...sorry for the eyeball strain! It's just that I don't really have as much time as I used to have. I wont promise, but I will try! :-)

Girls Only.

2009-05-28T10:29:00.009+01:00

I am bloated, super sensitive, having a fat ugly day, a bad hair day, I feel like I've re-entered puberty as far as the pimple zone goes and all of this because I'm PMSing.
Seriously. It's days like this that I let down the female team by saying: I hate being a woman. Sometimes.

Why do us woman have to go through so much shit. Periods, period cramps, giving birth, getting fat from that (I think guys should go through all the sympathy pains...their stomachs should swell-no the beer belly doesn't count, they should go through the pain etc...) we're more prone to bladder infections, we go through menopause etc...etc...etc....
It's rubbish. Absolute rubbish.
I feel like having a feet stomping temper tantrum, screaming into a pillow, having a good cry and then stuffing myself with chocolate.

Can you tell I'm in a bad mood?

In other news, I did go on a major shopping spree (OK, I do love being a woman.) It was a necessity because I needed new winter clothes. I don't know what happened to my winter things...did they get lost when I moved out of the ex? Are they stuck (by mistake) in storage with my kettle and cutlery?
I literally had a few coats and that was it. I got long sleeve shirts and tops, black pants, a fluffy robe and pair of slippers that I live in now. I don't actually want to leave the house and I find myself forcing myself to accept social invitations just in case I become one of those woman who never gets out of her pajamas and becomes severly obese.

I got 2 pairs of gorgeous black stilettos. 1 pair that has a pointed toe and 1 pair that has a rounded toe. Essential I tell you. OK, I told myself that, when I handed over my debit card for the hundredth time. I was surprised I didn't have blisters on my fingers from the number of times I had to punch in my PIN code.
Pay day (25th of each month) is a beautiful thing on the actual day and for the next 5 or 6 days. By the time the 1st of each month roles round I am broke again. Not entirely, but you get the idea.
However, I am still going to stand by the point that that shopping excursion was absolutely necessary. I can't be catching a cold now so that I wouldn't be able to work for the next salary. I needed those winter clothes...shoes, robes and slippers included. In my industry it's no work; no pay, so you see? Thank you Miss Excuses. You're much nicer than Mr. Murphy.

PS> I am starting to get alarmingly obsessed with vanilla tea. I use the word "alarmingly" because I find myself getting upset when restaurants don't serve vanilla tea. That isn't normal. I'm putting it down to the PMS week and will have to monitor myself closely the week after that. I'll keep you posted....or just keep checking the headlines for Crazy Girl arrested for assaulting Restaurant manager for not stocking Vanilla Tea.

Quicky

2009-05-20T17:20:00.003+01:00

I had to *sob* admit defeat. The European Boy's beat me. It pains me to type this.
I did however, eat my weight in prawns. Just about. I made us girls proud! I think I devoured 3 overflowing plates of prawns. The fact that I had to be rolled out of Jimmy's Killer Prawns is another story all together. Wow.

I have a quick Q...

Is there always fire where there's smoke?

Beaten by a Girl!

2009-05-18T14:24:00.004+01:00

I went back to gym today and I nearly died. I huffed and puffed like a sixty year old who smokes 60 a day. It was attractive. It felt good to be back though...back and focused.

May I please do a little victory jig. I just bought 2 pairs of Levi jeans...and they were two sizes smaller. I am so chuffed right now. I haven't been this size since I was...I don't know actually... that's how long it's been!
Speaking of shopping... I have a problem. OK wait. That sounds bad. I'm really not a shopaholic, in fact, I'm an embarrassment to the female race.
I'd like to think of myself as a really clever shopper. I manage to find good little steals and I know how to make something look really expensive when in fact it cost me nothing... just about.

I have had to do that to be honest, because I have such expensive taste. Expensive and international taste. I always manage to pick out the most expensive things in catalogues or I'll go into a store and love the pair of shoes/coat/dress/lounge suite that has the extra zero's on the end, while everything else is reasonable.
I'm also not shy to ask people in the street where they got certain things. I sometimes embarrass the people I'm around because I'll walk up to a woman and say: "Aw I love your necklace/hat/boots/jersey/etc...Where did you get it from?" I am yet to hear someone tell me they got it in this country. Hell, I'd even settle for someone telling me they got it in another province.
It's always:"Oh this? I got it in Dubai/Brazil/London/Spain/Thailand/Italy/Paris etc..."
See? Expensive AND foreign taste!
When I have had extra cash and spoilt myself on something boutique-y and expensive I hardly ever receive a compliment. HOWEVER... If I buy something from Mr. Price people flip out about it.I once bought a pair of shoes from Jet (they looked like Diors) and people flipped out. I just smiled knowing full well they cost me R99.99. :-)

Anyway.

I am so excited.

You know how much I adore/obssess over prawns. When I first started seeing European Boy I had to suss out if he liked the little garlic and lemon butter buggers. That would have been my deal breaker. Just kidding. Seriously. Turns out he loves them too and he instantly became a keeper. :-)
I was telling/warning him that I really am extremely embarrassing to be around when I eat prawns. I become an animal. Always a good thing to warn a new man. I need a warning label...or a "terms and conditions apply" label when I eat prawns or singledom could be a reality.
He's been telling me that he is worse. I don't believe him.
We've been egging each other on for a while now and finally we're putting it to rest. Tonight at Jimmy's Killer Prawns, is: ALL YOU CAN EAT SPECIAL!
I think I just orgasmed.

His brother got involved too, so now it is the European Boy's vs Blondie. Those boys are going down. I've been sending them messages all day asking them to prepare for the fact that they're going to be beaten...by a girl.
I'll let you know how it goes down tomorrow, unless of course I eat myself into a coma.

Oh shit...I may just put on those two dress sizes and have to take those Levi jeans back. We'll deal with that at tomorrow's gym session.
Let's hope for a victory people!

Saturday Night

2009-05-16T19:28:00.006+01:00

I originally thought that my life was rather sad earlier on, but now I'm actually just grateful that I am sitting at home on a Saturday night.

I'm working really early tomorrow morning. In fact I just set my alarm clock for 04h30. Lovely.

I could have pulled an all nighter, but I've done that before and it killed me. Never again.

I visited Blondie 2 today complete with flowers and donuts. Actually the donuts weren't a planned thing, but bakery smells are one of my favourites and it lured me inside. It wasn't my fault. I promise. Handy though - nothing like fattening but delicious comfort food after an operation.

It has been Laguna Beach Weekend on MTV and the two of us cuddled up (I was petrified that I was going to move too vigorously and hurt her stitches) all day and watched the show. It actually irritated me so much but I couldn't tear my eyes away from the drama and just had to know if LC was going to get back together with Jason or not. Oh My God!

They are so bitchy, shallow and superficial, but it's so entertaining that you can't help yourself. It also made me feel normal, human and intelligent. OK fine, it also makes me a little jealous of their gorgeous clothes etc...but still...

One of the guys threw one of the girls a surprise birthday party and afterwards he said: "Not telling my best friend about her surprise party was one of the hardest things I have ever had to endure in.my.life! Oh my God!!"

Blondie 2 and I killed ourselves laughing. Dude. People are dying and starving and THAT was the hardest thing you've ever had to endure. Seriously deep.

Man it was fun.

I got home today, poured myself a glass of Amarula Cream on the rocks (I had a craving) and mom was making a traditional South African dish called Bobotie. I cannot remember the last time Bobotie was made... Years have gone by I think. I've never really been a big fan of the dish, but tonight I particularly enjoyed it.

I have been uploading photo's onto Facebook, twittering, blogging, googling...you know? Just an average Saturday night :-)

It's nice actually...being at home on a Saturday. Either I'm in denial or I'm getting older, because I don't think the 16 year old Blondie would have been too impressed with that...it's a decade later and I'm looking forward to getting into my pink pj's, snuggling in bed with a cup of hot vanilla tea and my book and having an early night.

Sweet dreams

Fat and Lazy weekend

2009-05-15T08:35:00.003+01:00

I feel like a beached whale at the moment. I'm sure it's all in my head, but seriously. I feel fat.
I haven't set foot in the gym in over 3 weeks. I went to Knysna and obviously the cute idea that I had of running on the beach every morning was laughable. Then I returned back to Joburg in a mini skirt and slops...that was like landing in the Antarctic dressed for Mauritius. It resulted in a change of weather cold that came to bite me in the nasal passages last week, so no gym for me either. This week I still haven't felt hundreds and have had early meetings every morning which has messed up any routine Sugar and I enjoyed. The worrying factor is that the longer you stay away from gym; the easier it is to get into that routine. Oh no. Having a new man is motivation actually. No one wants to see jiggly bits or dimples in the wrong places.
Seriously. Monday morning is going to be my new start... I'm going to get focused and sweat my ass/tummy off. Literally.
Oh and the colder it gets, the further away I am from choosing a salad for lunch. Bring me hot chocolate, warm stews and warm comfort food. This is really not helping.

It's the weekend and I have no plans. It's weird actually. I know what I'm doing on Sunday morning...I'm working. I know that tomorrow I am going to visit Blondie 2...she went in for an operation so I'm going to bring her flowers and sit with her while the painkillers set in.
Poor thing.
Other than that, however, I have nothing on. It's really nice actually.

I hope you have a brilliant weekend.
xx

Rockstars and Happiness

2009-05-14T13:23:00.006+01:00

Watched Jesse Clegg last night at the Civic Theatre. He is twenty years old and I am prepared to say that I can see him breaking the international market.
It has nothing to do with the fact that he is Johnny Clegg's son - what we can say from that fact is: thank God for great genes.
What a stage presence. He was nervous sure, there were some technical diffculties (it happens often in showbiz) but all in all, he was a rockstar...even next to Arno Carstens who came on as a guest performer. Nice.
He also happens to be good looking and let's face it. It helps. I felt a little bad sitting in row N swooning over a twenty year old, but there is something about a good looking boy strumming a guitar. Just saying.
Oh and did I mention he's a great guy too? What a package. He was down to earth, humble and genuine. I got to meet him after the show and he was incredibly sweet.

I had a really good time. I also brought the new man with me. Yes, I've kept it quiet because quite frankly it has come as a big surprise...even to me. I wasn't looking for a relationship and I suppose it comes when you're not expecting it. So they say. He is also not my typical stereotype in men and honestly, I'm glad. I've broken a pattern that has never been very good or healthy. I've kept it quiet too because I didn't feel like being judged, explaining myself etc etc etc...
Thing is I've never been happier and I am having so much fun. He treats me like gold, he's caring and kind, he makes me laugh all.the.time. He brings out a really good side of me and I love the fact that I am totally myself around him. I can be my clumsy self without feeling self conscious and I'm happy. He isn't in my industry, which honestly, is such a bonus because he's supportive, fascinated with what I do and I now get to find out about his industry too. It's great.
It's early days and we shall see, but right now, this is good and I'm looking forward to seeing what new this journey brings.
So there, I've spilled the beans. I have such butterflies in my stomach and I can't seem to wipe this stupid grin off my face. What a feeling.

Short and sweet

2009-05-06T17:34:00.003+01:00

I am going to The Attic, a restaurant in Parkhurst tonight. I'm so excited. I don't know what it is about the Norwood, Greenside and Parkurst areas, but I just love it!
I would love to have an apartment there. Man, that would totally rock!

I have a 9 hour voice over session to get through over the next 3 days. 3 hours a day. It sounds relatively easy, but I can see I am going to be consuming copious amounts of water and tea to keep the voice fresh. The key is to keep the energy levels up too, so you sound as fresh as you did when you started.
Copious amounts of loo-going is going to happen too, I'm sure, with all the drinking.

Oh and horrors of horrors, my Blackberry is in hospital. Yes. It died, while I was in Knysna and I had to send it in for repairs. My Blackberry is fondly called My Crackberry, because I am that addicted to it. I am having withdrawl symptoms. I am also a bit of a phone snob now. I had to *shudder* remember how to use the predictive text mode again and not the QWERTY key pad I am so accustomed to.
Am I brat? Absolutely. I blame technology.

Knysna

2009-05-05T11:21:00.005+01:00

Soundtrack: Offsprings' Greatest Hits, Snow Patrol, The Killers and R.E.M
Indulged in: prawns, oysters, wine, Pezula spa.

Knysna was absolutely exquisite. Even the weather played ball. I did feel like a true Joburger though, because sure, it wasn't summer sunshine, but the sun still shone and that was good enough for me and my lily white ass to hit the beach. There were the locals who were in jeans and light cardigans walking along the beach with their dogs, I decided to ignore them as I smoothed on sunscreen, popped the iPod on and lay on my colourful towel ignoring the chill in the wind.

We stayed at Pezula in a house (well, the word "house" isn't really fair...more like a modern mansion) on the golf course over looking the ocean. It was spectacular. I particularly enjoyed the early mornings - heaven knows why I can't sleep in on holidays. I would sneak out onto the balcony, hoping not to wake anyone, and enjoy a cup of coffee, the quiet and the sunrise. Peaceful.

The one and only night we decided to go out in Knysna, turned out to be ridiculously fun. We had all been joking that the six of us were going to be the only ones at the club. Knysna had been relatively dead. We arrived at Zanzibar Club and it was decorated with pink draping, pink feathers, pink everything. My first thought was: Damn. Where did all these guys come from? and then my second thought was: Hang on. Why are there soooo many guys?
The party that was night was called The Pink Mardi Gras. It was Gay Night in Knysna.
What a jol!
Men were either wearing feathers, checked shirts, shorts with calf-length socks, or dresses, complete with wigs, fishnets and red lipstick.
I was so looking forward to hearing YMCA; It's Raining Men and We Are Family, but they didn't play those songs. Disappointing.
:-)
Why is it that boerewors rolls always taste like heaven at 2am? I drenched mine in tomato sauce and mustard and gobbled it down. Good times.

European Boy played a round of golf at Pezula and I drove the golf cart around. No one was injured, surprisingly enough, not even the baboons who were de-fleaing each other on the course. I have no idea how golf works, or what the point is really... You hit the ball away and then you have to find it again (a few times) until you putt it into a hole. 18 times. I wouldn't have a clue whether the guys played like shit or like Tiger Woods so I just gushed at how great they were playing. It didn't go down well when I called out, very enthusiastically: "Good shot!" Apparently, it's not a good thing when it lands in a bunker, the water or the fynbos.

I was treated to the Pezula Spa and I felt ridiculously indulgent. EB booked us into a shoulder, back and neck massage and honestly, it was the best massage I have ever experienced. *sigh*
We made use of the water massage bed too, the steam room, the heated pool and the jacuzzi that happened to be outside. That was my favourite. It was drizzling outside and we kept warm, if you know what I mean. ;)
I felt like a princess - totally and utterly spoilt!

I loved every minute of it and yes it was too short. Aren't holidays always?

I'm not quite sure how I'm going to cope with a normal 5 day week.

Please sir (universe)...can I have a break

2009-04-23T17:39:00.005+01:00

I've realised that I really am a complete workaholic. I love what I do and I'm seriously passionate about my career, but sometimes I just don't know when to stop.

I have really been optimistic and done my best to keep my chin up, a smile on my face and to keep on at it ...it being the treadmill.

I am, however, exhausted.

It's not just about working my ass to the bone, I've had a hectic year so far.

2009 has thrown a lot at me and we're only in April. It's not a "woe-is-me" type of thing, but I do kinda feel like I'm being tested. I'm certainly not testing fate when I say: "What else do you wanna throw at me, huh? Huh? Huh? Huh? Guess what, you've thrown a lot my way and I'm still standing."

I am physically exhausted, emotionally drained and just basically done.

I have decided to do something very un-Blondie like and actually take leave. Even my bosses were shocked and I'm grateful they were so obliging.

I am going down to the coast for an entire week...Knysna to be exact and I'm so excited I might just have an orgasm on the spot.

I'm switching off my phone and I'm going to recharge my batteries and become human again.

I fly down on Monday morning and get back next Saturday.

Heaven.

List

2009-04-21T17:22:00.004+01:00

I've lost my blogging mojo. That really sucks.

So, feeling totally uninspired, I didn't want to leave another mad gap between posts.

Thank you Being Brazen...I totally owe you :-)

1. Thought for the day: I cannot wait to go away to Knysna next week. After the year I've had so far: I. need. a break.
2. Song of the week: Katy Perry's - Waking Up In Vegas
3. Word of the week: Gym... I'm back on the health wagon.
4. Drink of the moment: Kola Tonic and Soda Water
5. Currently enjoying: Twitter and my new winter coat that I can finally wear because it's f*#&ing cold
6. Currently annoyed by: the fact that my camera and wallet got stolen and I'm totally broke.
7. Goal/s for the week: make it to pay day and go to gym every day this week.
8. Last thing you bought: Popcorn

Exercising rays of sunshine

2009-04-20T16:36:00.005+01:00

I wish I could say that I haven't blogged because I ate myself into a chocolate induced coma... well, I nearly did and have the spots ot prove it. Argh. Why does chocolate have to cause spots? It's just not fair.

Sugar and I are officially (no more excuses) back at gym. Yes we are. This is it. I was doing so well and lost a lot of weight...that should have been motivating enough but I fell off the wagon and enough is enough.
I actually forgot how much fun we have and how much I laugh at the two of us (afterwards...not during)
We always arrive in our gym attire looking at the gym doors like we're about to enter hell. We basically grunt at each other, give each a half-hearted morning hug, take a deep breath and walk in. Our gym cards are swiped and we look at the equipment like they're aliens who might and probably will hurt us.
Our spinning instructor is waaaay too cheerful in the morning.
"Gooood Moooorning Rays of Sunshine!!"
I made the mistake of once barking out: "What's good about it?"
He then decided it was his mission to "cheer me up" by winking at me, blasting the music, sending smiles of encouragement and basically annoying the crap out of me while he made us sweat on level 9 (standing on the pedals) for 12 frikken minutes - 5 times.
I also "cheerfully" curse Sugar. I tell her how much I hate her for doing this to me. I am really wonderful. In fact I could hire myself out as the "ultimate gym partner... just what you need to get you going...literally...away from me."
We do this one exercise where we lie on a bench and do stomach crunches while Sugar throws a medicine ball at, I mean, to me. I groan, grunt and cause havoc in the gym while everyone throws "shut-the-f*ck-up" looks at me. I need to get through the pain by letting everyone know just hard I am working, even if it means that the people on the opposite side of the gym hear me.

Afterwards, however, is a very different story. I feel those little endorphins buzzing through the bod. I feel exhilirated and I'm ready to face my day as a "ray of sunshine". In fact I'm so chuffed with the fact that I didn't get a hernia and I didn't pass out in a sweaty mess, that Sugar and I congratulate each other on the way out. We hi-5 each other and tell each other how fabulous we are and how we instantly look skinnier than we did when we arrived. We even celebrate across the road with a skinny cupaccino or 3.
Good times.
Good Skinnier Times.

Happy Holidays

2009-04-09T06:36:00.004+01:00

It almost feels cruel to make you feel ridiculously jealous. Amost.

My working day officially ends in an just under and hour and a half and then it is the long weekend baby! I am so excited because I really do need a break. I want to party and chill..preferably not at the same time because that would just be weird or interesting. I do want to stuff myself with hot cross buns and chocolate...ooooh...melt chocolate ON hot cross buns. Yeees! Washed down with a glass of red wine.

The only thing that would possibly be better is indulging on a tropical beach somewhere. Next time.

I hope you have a brilliant Easter weekend.

Can't get enough of....

2009-04-08T11:54:00.007+01:00

I really can't seem to get enough of some things right now. I have a love affair with coffee at the moment and if it was a possibility I would probably have an intravenous drip from the coffee pot into my veins.

Some of my other addictions that I really really can't seem to get enough are:

My mates...I don't know what I would do without them and I'm really glad I don't have to ever find out. I can't wait to see them and endulge in, well, coffee... and plenty of laughter.

Lemon meringue pie... Yes, I've only had one slice but it was so more-ish that I really want another slice or 3.

James Patterson books. He is my favourite author and I adore his writing, his creativity and his twists and turns.

Sleep -I really haven't been sleeping well and since my good news with my results being all good, I have been hitting my head on the pillow and passing out instantaneously. WWIII could happen and I wouldn't be any the wiser, however, I have only been managing to get four hours of sleep a night thanks to my schedule

Prawns - European Boy and I want to see if we can outdo each other in an "All-you-can-eat" special. He doesn't believe that I am embarrassing to be around. I will eat him under the table. I have no shame. Just give me the prawns and a bucket of lemon butter and I'm good to go. I'll deal with the cholestrol later.

Hats - it's my winter thing. I adore hats. I don't wear them as often as I'd like to, but there is nothing sexier or funkier than completing a fun outfit.

Chocolate - I've indulged my taste buds with dark chocolate and it's been decadent and heavely

Twitter - Yes. Who would have thought? I seem to be "getting it" finally and I'm ashamed to admit I find it fascinating following the likes of John Mayer, Ashton Kutcher and Nicole Ritchie etc...

Photography

Hit on

2009-04-06T05:19:00.006+01:00

I went to the pharmacy to get medicine. I hate pharmacies on Saturday mornings. It's like people only get sick on Saturdays. Long queues lined with sick people, screaming feverish children and pensioners with the worst coughs ever. I had this one little old "dear" behind me that insisted she had to be in my personal space and sniff, cough and splutter. I found myself involuntarily arching my back everytime she coughed. I don't really know why I arched my back, it was more like a mind thing that made me feel better like I had stopped her germs from spraying onto me. *Shudder*
I waited and waited and waited for the pharmacists to fill everyone elses scripts and when I finally got to the counter myself, they suddenly disappeared.
"Um...Hello?"
The one pointed at the phone she was talking on and the others looked at me as if I was interrupting something terribly important. Finally I had the one guy come over to me as if he was doing me a favour and finally (slowly) started to fill my script. I felt this burning sensation - the sensation that you're being stared at and looked up to see who was looking at me. There was a pharmacist standing there smiling at me and giving me those looks. I would have been flattered had it been some hunky McDreamy pharmacist, except that this pharmacist was a "hunky" woman. Hold the bus. She licked her lips at me, gave the "the look" and we all know "the look" and asked me if she could help me.
"Um no thanks. I'm good."
"Well you just call if you need anything...and I do mean anything at all!"

I'm throwing my perfume away. I don't know what happened this weekend, but I seemed to be hit on and hit on in the most random of places. Now being hit on is normally rather flattering and welcoming, let's be honest. However, being hit on by girls is just outright scary. I was hit on again on Sunday by another girl. Seriously. Am I putting out some vibe? How do I make it stop? If I was that way inclined, happy days, but I'm not and while I have several gay friends and I adore them, but being hit on by girls is somewhat surprising.

Sunday was awesome... I ended up going to European Boy's moms 50th at Casalinga. It was awesome! We were put at a table that was so entertaining. I definitely think that we were the loudest there and it was hilarious. We had a waiter who was a little comedian. He came to take drink orders and when EB's brother order a coke the waiter didn't miss a beat. "How many grams?"
We all stopped talking. "Wh-what?"
Hilarious!

Yesterday I was a complete lady of leisure...I had breakfast with my best guy friend The Converter, coffee with Sugar, a FIVE HOUR lunch with EB's brother and then drinks with EB's brother and Special K. Now that's the life!

April Fools Day

2009-04-01T16:53:00.005+01:00

I got pranked. Not once, but twice. Wow. I got a message from Special K this morning (in my defence I had just woken up and didn't know the date yet, let alone what day it was) saying that she was pregnant. I called her immediately, my mind already planning her baby shower only to hear a chuckle and a hearty: "April Fools!!!"
Bugger.

I thought I was done for the day, now being completely aware, when I got a call from this woman.
"Hi, is this Miss Blogshell?"
"Yes it is."
"Hi there, I'm phoning from Vodacom. I've been calling all our Blackberry clients today. Unfortunately the monthly fee that you pay which allows you unlimited access to internet, email and BB chat/IM is no longer feasible. We are alerting all our clients to the fact that we are going to start charging you for every email, IM and minute used on internet. We're having to disconnect your services until a payment is made upfront. We've had a look at your usage and I'm afraid that you are going to need to pay R5000."
"What?? You're kidding me. R5000? I know I am on my Blackberry all the time but R5000? Is this an April Fools Joke?"
"I'm so sorry about this...I've been getting that question all day, but I'm afraid it's no joke. We'll be sending you a letter to explain everything."

I put the phone down, completely seething. What the hell is the point of having a BB then? I know that R5000 seems ridiculous, but with the amount of time I spend using those facilites, nothing would surprise me.

10 minutes later, my dad called me saying that he had just received a phone call from Vodacom. When I originally got my contract back in the day, I wasn't able to sign surety, so my dad did. He told me that they had called him asking him if he was good for R5000. I started to explain everything when he stopped me and said... "April Fools!!!"
"Wh-What?"
I just hear the office pack out laughing. His bloody naughty secretary had been the "lady from Vodacom" and they got me good and proper. Little shits!!

My Blackberry is fondly called my Crackberry because it's my addiction. I might as well superglue it to my hand. It's ridiculous, I know. I can't help it though.

Well bloody done! Dad - you got me good!!

It's the weekend baby!!

2009-03-27T14:21:00.004Z

Onwards and Upwards completely. Thank you for your loving, suportive words!

I am not going to be a little pity party and life does go on... So I'm being positive and kind of ignoring it. Perhaps it's weird for some people, but it's my coping mechanism right now. I'm not sweeping anything under the carpet, but I just don't want to curl into a mess of a ball.

Today I had my make-up done for a TV shoot. I find it super relaxing having make up done. I would go as far as saying that I sometimes prefer it to a massage. Sacriledge I'm sure. I'm kinda glad the face is done because tonight I plan to have a party. Shit, why not? I need to knock back a cosmo or two and just enjoy myself with my friends Sugar, Special K and EB. I'm really looking forward to it and even bought a dress for the occasion. A dress that's not black. Another first. It's this deep purple colour and it's sexy. Yes!!

I also went underwear shopping today. I decided that the boring cotton undies and t-shirt bras are just not going to cut it anymore. I'm over being boring and being single certainly has given me something to think about. Even if no one sees it, I want to know that sexy lace is going on underneath my jeans and t-shirt. I bought a wonderbra that is so WONDERful I can't believe I never had one before. Yes. I am apparently slow. If I say so myself with the wonderful work that is Wonderbra...these puppies are swell. Excuse the pun.
Anyway, so you know it's bad when the lady at the underwear store remembers me and says: "Eish! It's been looong neh?"
Um. Great. Thanks for the update and for remembering. That isn't uncomfortable at all. WTF?
She even threw in a pair of panties with a wink. I couldn't wait to get out of there.

Have a wicked weekend xx

Mini Break

2009-03-20T16:19:00.004Z

I'm thinking of taking a mini break from blogging.

There's no real reason, just need a bit of a break and need to recharge the blogging battery!

Please don't abandon me...not just yet...

While I am taking a break from actually blogging myself; I am still going to read all of your blogs...man, I'm addicted to you guys and I can't NOT read your blog posts every day...I go crazy if I don't! LOL

:-)

Grins

2009-03-15T18:21:00.008Z

I am having a ball. No really. Is it possible to be having this much fun and be feeling this good?

I know you'll be reading this on a "Blue Monday" and so I may just be nauseating right now. Yes I have bad days and I'm not all rays of sunshine all the time, but right now, I am and while I feel like this, I am going with it. Work with me here.

Weekend is all a bit of a Blur. In a good way. Friday, was interesting... I was a part of a fashion show. Again, I am always quite perturbed that I get asked to do these things. It's not a fishing party right now, but I don't model. I am not a fashion hanger in any shape or form and so it is hilarious. I did this for a childrens charity with some Binnelander and Egoli stars. I wonder if all professional models run thoughts like: "Suck in your tummy! Shoulders back! Don't trip; don't trip..." through their minds. It was a high fashion, think European FTV channel fashion show with the weird make-up and hair and clothes I wouldn't wear out in public. It was fun to be a part of this experience, don't get me wrong, but I wish I could have taken a photograph of the looks I got from the models when I asked a simple question back stage. "To smile or not to smile, that is the question." I wanted to know what "look" we were supposed to be doing with high fashion, dark eyebrows and red lips. Were we supposed to smile or were we supposed to look like we were in pain or bored. I am always fascinated how these models portray their faces down the catwalk...the pained expressions are probably from not eating or shoes that are too small. I experienced this on Friday.

A little blurry, but here are two of the models...

High fashion make-up

Well, in case you were wondering, I was told not to smile from a model (striking features, mind you) who looked me up and down disdainfully, flicked her high-fashioned-teased hair and minced onto the ramp. So I didn't smile and I felt ridiculous. I have to smile. I am a smiley-person and if I can't smile when I want to, I take on a pained expression. Perhaps, that's it.

I had fun though and I got to gaze at the male models that really are quite beautiful. This one in particular looked exactly like Emile Hirsch and I embarrassed myself by staring too long and hard and then subsequently blushed furiously when he asked for my number.

Saturday was spent having breakfast at a quaint restaurant with the family and looking at cars. I have decided to get myself a new car. I felt guilty as I test drove these beautiful cars. Guilty because I felt like I was "cheating" on my car parked at home. I am still driving my very first car and she has certainly served me well for the past 7-8 years, but she's old now and so I am fickly trading her in for a new model. I'm excited.

I went to a braai that night at JB and had a blast drinking glasses of wine and playing 30 seconds...or tried to at least. My poor team mate must have been "chuffed" at being on my team. 2 bottles of wine will do that to you. I pretty much played like this:

"Um...um... It's the actress...um...shit....what's her name...oooh...ooh..ooooh...um....."

"TIME!!" Everyone yelled out, gleefully.

Normally I am a little champ at the game but with wine and shooters, I was useless at it.

I did however, see European Boy. This whole... yes, I can't believe these words came out of my mouth: "Let's just have fun and enjoy each others company with no strings attached" is very new for me and I'm certainly having fun.

I feel like a teenager again.

Today has been spent feeling sorry for myself, lying in bed catching up on all the Girls of The Playboy Mansion episodes and catching up with Sugar. She came to visit me and we giggled like school girls.

Oh and yes...here she is...looking smoking hot...man, I want a body like this and if she can go from looking how she did to looking how she does now...I have HOPE!! HOORAY!! I'm back to gym tomorrow!

Friday the 13th

2009-03-13T06:21:00.008Z

I raced through to meet up with European Boy last night. I hate being late and I had traffic and timing against me. Everyone should see The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. Fantastic movie. And yes. I watched the movie.... Really.
I've found a great little spot for after-movie wine. Found it with Sugar and shared it with E.B.
We sat drinking wine and laughing. I seem to be laughing a lot lately and I'm loving it. I also did a fair amount of blushing. I really would love to remove whatever it is that makes me blush. Apparently there is a tablet you can take for it. I'm good...for now.
It was a great night and I can't wait to do it again. Too much fun right now!

Today has been a good day... I got rid of any post wine headache at yoga. My mom finally managed to drag me with her today. It's my first time trying yoga and I really enjoyed it even if I felt like a retard most of the time. How is it possible that women who are older than my grandmother in Switzerland can wrap their ankles around their necks while breathing calmly? I didn't see one person over weight though...that's excellent news.

I am so stuffed at the moment... My department went out for lunch today and we over indulged on Indian food. Good grief it was "more-ish" and we all picked off each others plates. Had a little bit of everything...and stayed clear of Vindaloo... the last three letters are quite telling apparently.
I have had two glasses of red wine so work this afternoon is going to be fun... It would certainly explain my spontaneous shopping spree staright afterwards. Why can't I just walk into a store and purchase what I set out to get? I arrived to get my turquoise necklace I ordered and walked out with earrings, make-up, two dresses and a pair of leather leggings...I'm unstoppable!

Normally my Friday the 13th's are average. Neither lucky nor unlucky. Today, I've just been in a really good mood. It's weird to think that today is 2 months since I walked out on the ex. How amazing life is now. I don't mean that with any disrespect but I have to be honest.

I'm looking forward to this weekend...should be interesting. That's all I'm saying. For now.

Have a great one!

Movie Mania

2009-03-12T14:42:00.006Z

I've fallen off the gym wagon. Nooooo. I hate being sick. I refuse to go to gym when I am, but unfortunately I really struggle to get back into the routine of it. I know that I should be ridiculously thrilled and motivated considering I have lost 7kgs, but for some horribly strange reason I just don't operate like that!
Sugar and I are feeling nasty and even though I'm not eating badly, I feel so much better when I go to gym. See? Even that statement should show that technically if I feel better when I go, it should be easy. Um. No.
I think there is something wrong with me.

Saw Marley and Me last night and I loved every minute of the movie. It was great. Brought back so many memories of my labrador puppy. I donated her to the South African Guide Dogs Association (the hardest thing I have ever done...bitter sweet) and went to her graduation a year ago actually. She is now a full fledged Guide Dog working with Bennie, her blind owner. Anyway, so I laughed and cried through the movie. Walked out with mascara on my chin and popcorn in my cleavage. Shit, I don't know how this always happens to me, but I seriously, always find stray popcorn bits stuck in the bra. Attractive.

I have been awake since 5am this morning. Now, this is normal for most, I get that. Excuse my brat behaviour now. But SERIOUSLY. Are we not supposed to be in summer? Why was it dark and cold. It should be illegal. I was up at 5am, to leave by 6am for the University of Johannesburg. My sister was graduating today...she received her BA Honours in Marketing Communications and missed cum laude by a few percentage. Poor darling! I am extremely proud of her!
My entire family attended the ceremony and we all went for a celebratory lunch in Parkhurst afterwards. It was lovely.
As a result of me being awake since 5am, I felt like the day should be over by 1pm, not half way through. I cannot stop yawning.

Tomorrow my department is going out for lunch and we're doing curry. Should be good fun! Great way to pass over a Friday 13th. Second one this year. Hope this brings lots of luck.

Tonight I have a movie with E.B. and I think we're either seeing The Curious Case of Benjamin Button or Slumdog Millionaire. Excellent, because I've been dying to see both!
I know that we're both tired, so hopefully we wont be snoring through it. :-)

Hmmm...I think I have seen more movies in the past 2 months than I have in 6 years.

Loving life

2009-03-09T15:11:00.006Z

Well, who knew that I would have actually had fun last Thursday night at the ex's event. Sugar was unbelievable on stage. It was my first time seeing her perform live with her Hip Hop band. Move over Black Eyed Peas! WOW!
I saw the ex, he didn't greet me at all and didn't greet any of my friends. I found it weird considering that they all phoned him when we broke up to say they were sorry and that there was no animosity from their side. Anyway, who is judging. Oh and the gf/fling/whatever and the ex were all over each other like a rash. I actually wasn't bothered at all. It was a test for me personally and sure it was hard and weird seeing him kissing someone else, but I didn't have a pang of missing, hurt ot anything like that. In fact that night, just confirmed everything for me and I felt relieved and happy to not be with him anymore. I felt that in the first week of the break up but seeing him with someone new really affirmed everything.
I had fun, we danced and drank and was close to throwing my bra on stage for Sugar. I saw European Boy too and I’m glad that I did. I didn’t think he would pitch, but he has been full of surprises.

This weekend was too much fun! Friday night I chilled out and on Saturday I had brunch with my friends from Varsity, JB and K. I felt like I had walked into Sex and The City. K was telling us about all her single escapades... she makes single life seem fun (as I am finding out myself) I had my jaw on the floor most of the time. I loved it. She is our very own Samantha from SATC. Wow - she has stories that could make anyone blush!
That night, I literally dragged myself out. I'm so glad I did. Sugar and I met up with European Boy. We had so much fun that we only got home in the early hours of the morning.
Let me just say that E.B is an amazing kisser. Another surprise.

Just saying.

I stayed over at Sugar and we literally stayed in bed the entire day, groaning and moaning. We drew straws to see who would get up and make toasted cheese and tea. She drew the short straw. Haha.

Single life is proving to be so much fun!

Onwards and Upwards

2009-03-05T13:20:00.005Z

Right so... If you haven't seen the movie "Seven Pounds" on circuit at the moment, with Will Smith, YOU HAVE TO! Be prepared to cry...alot...but MY GOD...what a movie! I haven't seen something that thought and emotion prevoking in years.

Tonight is certainly going to be interesting. Sugar is performing in an event with her band and I am going to support her...thing is, my ex is putting on the event. I haven't seen him since our break up. Oh, did I mention he has a new girlfriend?
Anyway... He can't affect me anymore, onwards and upwards. I am excited to see her perform live and I'm going to have fun with my friends. Special K, Bambi and I are going through to support her. European Boy is coming through too with all of Sugars friends...that should be interesting. Haha.

Oh and drum roll please. I have lost 7 kgs. Yes I have. All thanks to no more emotional/comfort eating, my gym routine and a far healthier lifestyle and eating habit! Gosh I'm chuffed!
It's weird though, because I can feel that I'm lighter, the scale certainly says as much but I don't really see it. Perhaps that's because this body is with me all the time that it's like: "Oh, you again!" LOL

Life is positive.

I kissed a boy and I liked it!

2009-03-02T07:44:00.007Z

No McSteamy/McDreamy doctor to prescribe my antibiotics unfortunately, just a McLady doctor who gave me potent medicine so that I could feel better within 24 hours.
The meds are quite incredible, however, with them being so potent I was warned:
NO ALCOHOL.
Don't even think about having a drop.
Don't joke around about being a "cheap date."

Alrighty then, so on Friday night (feeling like a new person) I went around to the "Top Billing" Bryanston Mansion. It was a spontaneous thing and I was told to come around after work for a small get together to celebrate the lawyers birthday. Puh-lease. I arrived to the fanciest of cars lining the street and melt-in-your-mouth cuisine that had "simply been whipped up."

It was rather embarrassing when I saw the gifts he was being given like a case of Veuve and Moet etc... I only knew it was actually a birthday party when I was on my way there at 19h30, by default of calling my mate, so I stopped at a garage and bought a PS Chocolate that said: You're Awesome!
Hey...it's the thought that counts and I just couldn't pitch up empty handed.

Picture this: The hottest, most gorgeous men you have ever seen in your life in every corner to drool over. They compliment you, tell you how beautiful you are and appreciate your shoe fetish. Heavenly.
Not so heavenly? They're all gay.
Life is mean.

On Saturday night, I went off with my gang to Movida for their first birthday party a le Moulin Rouge theme. I was tempted to wear a feather boa and all that jazz (wrong musical I know) so I just stole one from the MC.
I did however...kiss a boy. Now this might not be earth shattering to most, but for me this is a "never-been-done-before"... I have only ever kissed someone I've dated. Howdoyalikethat? I'm no prude, I've just never really done it. No reason really.
I must say, I feel rather silly even talking about this, but it is a big deal for me, considering I am painfully shy around the opposite sex and even more so when there is a potential of swopping saliva...hence the reason it's never really been done before.
It was rather hilarious. I had my guy friends picking out men for me because they were very unimpressed that I hadn't kissed anyone new in 6 years. They were pointing them out and then pushing me towards them. I was laughing so much because it really was rather ridiculous. I kept protesting saying: "That's all very well that you point these boys out to me...and then? What exactly am I supposed to do?"
Anyway...I didn't have to go over and say hello because I was intercepted by some really cute boy who asked my name. I told him it was Mandy. I would have gotten away with that had my friends not come over and acted as my very own publicists. Grrrreat. Thank you. Hmph.
Anyway, so he kissed me and then I walked away. Was it embarrassing having all my friends hi-5 me like 16 year olds? Absolutely.
He did however, come over to me 15 minutes later with a drink in hand and kissed me again.
It was totally un-Blondie like of me... and even more so that I didn't really catch his name.
Oh my God. I'm cringing at myself and the fact that I've written this... but it was nice, weird and lovely and definitely going to have to get out there more often...

Cough!

2009-02-25T15:06:00.008Z

I don't do sick. I don't know anyone that does really, but SERIOUSLY!! I have the most irritating tickle in my throat that makes me want to cough...ALL. THE. TIME and no amount of coughing actually scratches the cough. In fact it just irritates it more so I cough and splutter and act rather lady like.
I am close to overdosing on cough mixture.

I don't feel sick though. That makes no sense at all, I know... It's just the tickle and cough and phlegm. Yummy.

I thought some retail therapy would work. Apparently not, but now I have 2 pairs of really HOT shoes.
Here they are...

I'm going for dinner tonight with a mate that used to work with me and I'm looking forward to the catch up. No red wine for me tonight, although it would make for an interesting evening on my cocktail of cold medicine.

So...I started writing this yesterday afternoon and never actually posted it...

I have woken up this morning, not feeling terrible, but feeling as if someone has punched my chest hard. I am going to the doctor because this cough is getting worse and I can feel it in my chest now. I'm going to the doctor today at 11am. Apparently my doctor is away so I have a substitute male doctor. I hope he is a McDreamy or McSteamy. What are the chances right? I am yet to find a hot doctor. Well, no, that's not true. I do know one and he is a very good friend of mine, so it doesn't count. I think it should be part of the "So-you-wanna-be-a-doctor" requirements you know, like: Must be good looking.
I wouldn't have a problem then when they say: "Miss Blogshell, please get undressed." or "Miss Blogshell let me check your pulse.... wow, it seems to be racing. I think I'm going to have to check on you personally and make a house call to you later."
Um. OK!
Reality will most likely set in as soon as I walk in and he'll be dweeby with ice cold hands.

Dinner last night was fantastic... 4 Indian gals and myself caught up on all the gossip and it was only when the food arrived that I felt like a typical Westerner. My Indian friends all ate curries and I had a good ol' fillet of steak with mushroom sauce.

Right, let me go get ready... I need to make sure I make "sick" look good. Just in case.

Stained teeth and ticklish throats.

2009-02-23T06:55:00.007Z

So scratch the weekend list. Most things changed.

I did see the movie on Friday night He’s Just NOT That Into You and it was depressingly brilliant. Haha. I had a debate with a friend because yes, the movie did make women look pathetic and men look like assholes, but on a whole, there was a lot of truth to it and that was depressing.
As a woman, being single now, I am learning new things and I’m learning that if he doesn’t call you or want to see you often, he really isn’t into you, or he would find any excuse to call or see you.
It was just very interesting and I think that it is a movie that guys and girls can enjoy. It's not necessarily only a chick flick. I couldn't get over how many couples were watching the movie and how many guys were there in a group. Very interesting.
It was a good movie and I would definitely have that in my DVD collection.

I did go to Pilates. Now, I’ve only gone to Pilates a few times, but the woman kept telling us that if we had never done Pilates before, we should go to the orientation. Sugar and I finally got our act together and did the orientation. Holy Crap. I clearly have been doing everything wrong in the classes, because after being shown how to breathe correctly and hold and release etc, I felt everything. Everything. My muscles actually shook throughout the session and that burning pain (the good kind) was there immediately afterwards.

I did not go to the launch on Saturday night and instead, went over to Special K for wine.
So, I have a little secret... I normally don’t drink red wine because for some reason it gives me heart burn and so I’ve always just stayed away from it. However, last Monday night I drank red wine. 2 bottles actually (not on my own, mind you) and I didn’t have one stitch of heart burn. In fact I really loved it. I made a note of the bottles and their makes that James Bond had pulled out for us and have decided to rethink my wine drinking. I could actually get quite used to it. I decided to try red wine again and Special K and I finished off a bottle rather quickly. It was delicious and I like red wine far more than white wine now.
The only downer of red wine? The fact that it stains your teeth. There I am sitting with my mate, feeling all very sophisticated drinking this lush glass, when I caught a glimpse of my teeth... Now this happened last Monday night too. Mortifying. Not exactly Colgate Smile material, you know?
Good God. Did I eat liquorice? Nope.
Must remember to bring gum next time I drink red wine in male company.

I also did not go for coffee with Europe Boy after he cancelled on me. I would have had to cancel anyway, I woke up yesterday with incredibly sore muscles, which I presumed was from the Pilates. Yes, to a large extent it was, but I am also getting sick. F*@!
I hate being sick, especially when my lifestyle has changed into a rather healthy one. I have a tickle in my throat, my head feels like it may explode from the pressure and headache and I am miserable. I didn’t get out of my pyjamas yesterday and just lay around watching TV and making countless cups of fresh ginger, lemon and honey tea.
I’ve woken up this morning, with no pressure headache, but just a scratchy throat with a pathetic little cough. Argh.
It’s the change in weather. I always get something like this the day before the weather changes. I swear, I could be a weather beacon. Trust me, I wouldn't have a problem with Derek Van Dam (e-TV's weather guy) phoning me up for tips ;-)
Today, the wind is howling and nippy even though the sun is shining.
I am in bed under my duvet with my muesli and laptop at the moment.

PS> I’ve never been so excited for Wednesday. Pay Day. No more end-of-the-month salticrax for me anymore.

Inspiration comes in all forms

2009-02-20T14:03:00.008Z

I am completely dead from gym. Spinning yesterday and now an hour today that consisted of cardio and weights.
Yesterday's spinning class was certainly guilt ridden. Sugar and I arrived early to get a bike, adjust it and so forth. The instructor had her back to us (she was new.) I am quite funny about trainers/instructors etc. I once went to an aerobics class where the instructor was such a fatty that it was off putting. Don't be shouting out: "1, 2, 3, 4" and make us sweat our asses off when you look like that. I want you to be my inspiration, not make me feel hopeless.
Anyway, so there was our new instructor wearing cycle shorts. Now, at the risk of sounding funny...she was skinny, had lovely legs, toned arms etc. Perfect and inspiring.
She finally turned around and I could not believe my eyes. Perfect little body with a 7 month stomach. I have never felt so guilty. She's pregnant, taking a spinning class and there I am huffing and puffing away with a tummy that has no excuse, really. Now that was inspiration.
She killed us.
So today I am walking really strangely and look like an 86 year old, not a 26 year old.

My weekend consists of:
A movie tonight...going to watch He's Just NOT That Into You. I've been dying to see this movie! I have the book, but I've never finished reading it and I think it can certainly help in a lot of areas - haha!
Pilates tomorrow.
I'm hoping to go to the A1 GP, but the verdict is still out on that one.
I'm going to a launch on Saturday evening and possibly jolling afterwards.
Sunday...gym (missed Mon and Tues) so Sugar and I are determined to make our 5 x a week schedule. I have a goal and I'm sticking to it, for once and for all.
Oh yes...and I have a coffee with Europe Boy. We shall see though... I don't really know what to think actually... um... My mates are telling me go, but I don't know if I should. I met him at a friends birthday very briefly and was pleasantly surprised to get an email from him on Monday. Why not, right?
Have a good one!! xx

Good times

2009-02-19T07:09:00.007Z

I went to the opening of exclusive new 5-Star International Radisson SAS Hotel Sandton. This launch was absolutely fantastic and they seriously spared no expense whatsoever.
We were all taken to the 12th floor where speeches were made, Moet champagne flowed and photographers flash bulbs were over excited!

We could help ourselves to the Moet Champagne Dress

The hotel really is quite exquisite in decor, space and pure luxury.
Special K and I bumped into Marcus Brewster, who leaned in as if he had a secret that could freeze time and said:
“Blondie, if you go one floor up, they have lobster and more Moet.” pointing at my empty flute, “And if you go down one floor the spa is there with a little goody bag!”
Oh what to do; what to do? LOL

The 13th floor was sensational. I have NEVER seen a spread of food like that in my life. Chefs were making fresh pasta and other dishes from the ingredients set out. One of the things that Special K and I wanted to take home was a huge whole uncut cheese, that had been hollowed out and filled with grated parmesan cheese. Presentation was incredible!! There was a Thai section, antipasti section with artichokes, cold pasta dishes and various types of olives and sundried tomatos. The Seafood section (my favourite) had some of the most delicious sushi I have ever tasted, there were oysters and crab, lobster and crayfish, melt in your mouth salmon, mini mussle pots.

This was the chef that prepared my lobster!

HEAVEN. I believe there was a dessert table, but I didn’t look too hard for it. I wanted to (being president of the sweet tooth society and all that) but I am on a Get-Thin-Mission.

We finally got to go down to the 11th floor and that beautiful aromatherapy smell wafted into our nostrils. Special K and I both turned to each other and dreamily said: “Ah, the smell!”
I hope heaven looks like this spa. It is so incredible and I can honestly say I have never seen anything like this! I have booked for after pay day and Special K told me she’s going to be doing a lot of hinting considering their anniversary is coming up.

We went back upstairs, goody bag in hand and spoke to various people, that we (sadly) only ever see at these types of functions. It was incredibly hot inside and while I love heat, when it starts to get too hot, my body can’t handle it! I started to feel really faint and my skin was prickling.
Special K took one look at me and agreed that we should leave. She got me to the car and put the air con on full blast. She just knows. As soon as I started to cool down, I started to feel better.

Today I’m going to a spinning class at 1pm.

I've also been getting messages from Europe Boy asking me for a lunch or coffee... I don't know. Perhaps I should just go for a coffee. I just don't know anymore.

3 in 1

2009-02-18T14:04:00.008Z

I am so used to blogging everyday and recently I haven't had the chance to...so I am going to jam pack a few days into one :-)

On Monday night I went over to James Bond for pizza and wine! It was great fun! I nearly got a six pack from all the laughing and even realised that I could possiby form a band after my "brilliant" guitar playing skills... he taught me how to play a little and after my hand resembled a spastic claw, I managed to strum and actually create a sound that didn't make our ears bleed. Lovely.
I also got to see Kung Fu Panda, a movie I've wanted to see for a while now! I love animated films, I think they're so cute and brilliantly done!

Today I went back to gym after missing a few days. Tsk tsk. I nearly died. How is that possible? There I am huffing and puffing, red faced and moaning on the treadmill and bicyle. Sugar and I kept looking at each other. I couldn't admit defeat in our regime by saying as much (it's our little deal), so instead, I kept trying to "SOS" her using morse code through my blinking. She didn't get it and rather asked me if I'd like to use her towel to wipe the sweat out of my eyes.
Knowing there would be a skinny cuppaccino afterwards at Appleby's, kept me going. Seriously.

I hate showering at the gym. I really hate it. I know we're all women and we've all seen it all etc, but I just cannot bring myself to change in front of others. I almost admire women who are able to walk around naked without a care in the world. If I was Gisele Bundchen, hell, I'd walk around like that all the time, but I'm not and some of the women doing as much aren't either. Gotta hand them a confidence trophy or something.
Anyway, after that and the coffee, I had on my black pencil skirt, white shirt and fuck-off heels and went to meet my Attorney. I thought I should look the part. I'm a dork, I know... but it's all good because the outfit is not entirely wasted.
Tonight is the launch of this new hotel in Sandton and they've promised champagne. Special K and I are going to just have to indulge.

Don't read if you get queasy!

2009-02-17T14:47:00.003Z

Isn't it funny how quickly life can change.On Saturday afternoon I had just finished having tea and Valentines cupcakes with my family out on the patio, when I went to get ready for the Valentines Ball.

I was in the bathroom about to start make-up when my mom rushed into the bathroom as pale as a ghost. I have never seen my mom like this and worry immediately set in."Um, um, um, um.... Where is the portable phone? We need to phone an ambulance immediately!!"
WTF?

I walked around the corner and nothing could have prepared me for that. It's amazing how many thoughts can run through your mind in a fraction of a second. It looked like a massacre had occurred in my home.
There was blood everywhere, on the walls, puddles of blood on the floor, matter in the blood and just horror. There were two thoughts that entered immediately.
Someone in my family has had a terrible accident or someone has attacked my family and my mom got away.
I had my phone in my hand, already dialing the ambulance and I cancelled it to call the police. My dad had consequently called the ambulance and I cancelled the call to the police when I walked into the other bathroom. Lying in my bathtub was a young 18 year old girl, with her 19 year old boyfriend in the bath hovering over her.Her face was a bloody pulp. It was like something out of a disgusting horror movie. Flaps of skin were hanging down, her face was broken and the blood... The blood.

The two of them had been driving around our estate as Learner Drivers looking for their dog.They had been coming up our road travelling really slowly, when 3 ten year old boys on their bicycles had picked up the dog and were riding down our road looking for the owners.They stopped their car and the boys handed the dog to them through the drivers window. What happened after that is completely a freak accident. The dog jumped down onto the floor and onto the guys foot on the accelerator. They drove full force into a tree and this poor girl went straight into the windshield.

I ran around trying to get towels, but not really being able to use them because we couldn't stop the bleeding by adding a pressure on a broken face and skull. I mixed up sugar water and tried to get them both to drink it. Her parents finally arrived and we tried to warn them not to get a fright (yeah right) when they saw her. They freaked out and rushed her to the hospital before the ambulance got there. There was no point in waiting! We've been feeling guilty, because in the terror and adrenaline of everything, we didn't think to do that ourselves.

The most surreal thing of it all was that half an hour later, I was in my evening dress off to the ball (I was working.)It was crazy.

We've been getting updates of this poor girl and it is just horrific. The flaps of skin? Her eyelid and they had to reconnect that. She broke her eye socket and left side of her face. She lost all the skin and tissue on her face and is going to need 5 or 6 reconstructive surgeries.
She is a model and now her face is never going to be the same again. We hope that the plastic surgeons will do the most amazing job, but she needs so many skin graphs that it's going to be difficult for her face to not have scars.
Her poor boyfriend is riddled with guilt because of the accident; he is in his first year Medical School and he kept saying that he did everything wrong for the situation plus he was wearing his safety belt and he should have ensured that she was too! Poor things!

Life can change so quickly and it's just another reminder that even if you're driving around the block, wear your safety belt!! I was in a horrific car accident in 2001 and the only thing that saved my life was a safety belt (something that I never used to wear - terrible habit that changed very quickly when I got a second chance at life....we'll leave that story for another day!)

Formal vs Casual

2009-02-12T15:05:00.002Z

I am going to an event tonight at the Westcliff Hotel. The dress code says: Formal.

Dress codes make me nervous because no one ever seems to oblige or obey.

I am very aware that "formal" (in my dictionary) means evening dress and suits for the guys, however, I have been to formal events before in an evening gown and people have been in cocktail dresses or worse, black pants and a smart top. That for me, is semi casual or cocktail attire.I have also rocked up at a "formal" event (having learnt from the above mentioned) in a cocktail dress and people were in evening gowns and ball gowns. Ball gowns.
These days Formal means weird and wonderful things to different people. I have a long black dress with a little diamante detail... I just hope people dress up as well, otherwise I'll just have to target the champagne table in my gown.

What are the chances that I have two formal functions to go to? Apparently good, except I actually do know what to wear on Saturday...it's a Valentines Ball.

I went to JJ Schoeman (a hot SA designer) who is giving me a dress to wear (and return) for Saturday. I have a broad back so zips in that area are always a bit of a mission (as in I need to go up a size. Yay for me.) Designers design for size 0 Fashion Hangers aka Models ; not for the normal woman.Well, I found a dress, after chiffon and silk was thrown around and it is flattering. Alright, honestly I sucked everything in within a cm of my life and was too nervous to exhale, but I did after looking like a smurf and nothing ripped. Phew.

I'll report back tomorrow!

Hoax or Reality?

2009-02-11T13:42:00.004Z

Um... I received this email and I am trying to figure out if it is a hoax or if this may be a reality. I hardly ever use the R200 note so R500 will be an interesting one.

It wouldn't be too terrible considering it would still be half the value of a $100 bill. Just saying.

Are we going the same way Zimbabwe is? Nah.

I guess we'll find out with the Budget Speech from the newly wed Trevor Manual.

Birthday Weekend

2009-02-10T20:03:00.005Z

On Friday night I had my Twenty Sexy Birthday Party at Cedar Square. I hired out a private dining room and bar and had all my good friends there for dinner and drinks. It was absolutely fantastic. I had to drink so many birthday drinks that I am surprised I lasted as long as I actually did!
We landed up at FTV and eventually left at 3am. It was a total blast, even if I didn’t feel the same the next day.

I spent most of the day trying to recover for Sugar’s Twenty Sexy birthday party. It was at Colony Arms for the karaoke. I was warned that we would probably be the oldest there and not to expect too much. Um. Ok.
Well I felt as if I was surrounded by twelve year olds and I was back in my student days with drinks costing the bare minimum. It was great fun. I owned Britney Spears’ One More Time in karaoke. I even did some of the dance moves. Yes I did. What? The drinks were cheap. I met all of Sugars friends...great group of people... especially a certain someone;someone that caught my eye. But, *sigh* they left early so there went that idea! Haha! Just kidding!

I eventually went home at 1am and avoided the road blocks. Metro Cops had stopped striking so I think they were making up for lost time.

Sunday morning was spent driving to Hartebeespoort Dam with my family to a place called The Windmill. It sells organic fruit, vegetables, freshly baked bread, homemade jams and cheeses, amazing meat selections and so on. We love going there, stocking up on gorgeous foods and enjoying the drive with the roof down of the car and taking in the fresh air.

I got back just in time to get ready for the twins 30th birthday party at Longmeadow’s. Tables were set out in the garden and it was really beautiful... speeches were made, the most delicious food was served...don’t get me started on the chocolate brownie and white chocolate birthday cake. I went to spinning today and I think I just worked off the cake.

The Twins cutting their birthday cake!

Right so, after a hectic weekend, Monday night was spent in bed. Nope. It was spent at very good friends home. Survivor and his fiancé cooked Burmese chicken with a coriander and pear salad. Chocolate Soufflé was served for desert with chocolate tot glasses, Bailey’s Irish Cream and champagne. I laughed and laughed and had the best night. I only got home after midnight.

The single life is great… I’m doing whatever I like, how I like it and according to my style. Selfish? Not at all. I’m connecting with all the people I really love and never got a chance to spend as much time with as I liked. It’s not to say that I didn’t spend time with my friends, it’s just that I’m getting to spend MORE time with them. It’s wonderful.

I'll be back.

2009-02-10T14:46:00.002Z

Apologies.... I have been recovering from 3 birthday parties.

Mine on Friday night, Sugar on Saturday and the Twins on Sunday.

I promise to BLOG about all as soon as I get a chance....work is manic and life is great. Whoop whoop!

BIRTHDAY!!

2009-02-04T16:07:00.006Z

I'm TWENTY SEXY today!! Yes I am.

I have had one of the most special birthdays and have felt like a billion (not Zim) dollars today! I have been completely spoilt!

My family gave me the most beautiful gifts... I received a satin pencil skirt from my sister, Thomas Sabo star charm with small diamonds for my Thomas Sabo bracelet and a phenomenal 3 piece luggage set for my travelling.

My mom, dad and sister took me out for a delicious birthday breakfast.

I got home and then Special K took me to Byzance for lunch. It was perfect. We overlooked the lake, watched the rain and ate mushrooms with artichoke pesto & halloumi croutons and choux with goats cheese and spiced figs.

To end it off we drank warm Irish coffees and had the most amazing chat about love, life and friendship. It was so special. She gave me the most beautiful BVLGARI necklace. SPOILT!!

The messages of love have poured in and I'm feeling so incredibly special!

Tonight I am going home to have a delicious home cooked meal with champagne with the family!

Friday night is my birthday party! I. am. so. so. so. excited!

Last day of my Mid Twenties

2009-02-03T16:01:00.004Z

It is my last day of my quarter life crisis. Tomorrow I turn Twenty Sexy.

I am normally soooo excited about my birthday but I don't know if it's because of what's been going on or if I'm just blergh about being on the wrong side of 25.
Yes, yes...I'm still 4 years from 30, but seriously. These past 6 years flew by...um...

I'm sure that tomorrow will be all very lovely. Nothing a big fat piece of chocolate cake can't sort out.

Speaking of cake (or the lack of) I am down 5kgs so far. See? A break up can be a good thing.
Just kidding.

No seriously, I have always done boxing and as much as I love it, I haven't really seen as many results as I'd like to...perhaps it's just my body shape. Must be, because the women in my class all turned into buff goddesses. I was tired of being the blob in the class and so I decided to actually use my Virgin Active account - something I payed for every month and never used.
I started on the 5th January and although I've been pretty good, I didn't get a chance to go at all last week. I am doing shit loads of cardio, pilates and today I did my very first spinning class. Mother of ...
I was so stiff and sore five minutes after the class that I'm sure I'm going wake up tomorrow feeling like an old lady and no, it's not because I'm a year older.
The burn is all worth it. I will get down to my goal weight and I must be honest, I am feeling fantastic seeing the results.
It also helps being back at home... my family is amazingly healthy and I have been eating 3 meals a day, which to some is normal; to me it really was pure laziness.
Take today for instance... a fresh salad with tomatos and yellow peppers, fresh asparagus and tuna. Delicious, easy and healthy.

Tomorrow I will cheat and have lots and lots of cake. Hooray!

Oh and on a completely different note...Monte Casino is holding the SA Tennis Open. I went to watch last night. It was my first live tennis match and I loved every minute of it. I loved it so much that I bought tickets to go again tonight. Last night I watched Doubles of Kevin Anderson (SA) and Tsonga (French) play against two Spaniards. We then watched the single match between Cypriot Marcos Baghdatis and our very own Andrew Anderson. I loved the "challenges" when a player doesn't agree with the umpire. They turn to the electronic device that shows us where the ball lands. It's the small things you see? I loved it when the crowd went: Oooooooooh in the big build up to see where it lands and then everyone either goes: Yay! or Awww!
It was great.
Tonight I'm going to watch Tsonga and a SA dude. Fun.

Yes She Can!

2009-02-02T15:05:00.007Z

Apologies for Friday. I literally LOST IT and I wrote in the very thick of my emotions, which strangely enough was rather comforting to get out.

I'm much better now. I know this may seem a little "bi-polar" from one post to another but...
I have decided that I am going to change my attitude to things. Is this going to be easy? Nope, but I have to do this for my own sanity.

I am going to be positive from hereon out and try my hardest to not let things affect me. Yes, the stories will come, but instead of being sucked into them and sinking into a deep- hard-to-get-out-of-black-hole, I'm going to try and not let them affect me, by remembering that I left for a very good reason and that I've done the right thing. These stories affirm things for me.

I am going to focus on my future that I just know is going to be bright - positivity, you see? I'm going to focus on my dreams, my goals and I'm going to surround myself with amazing, true human beings.

One day at a time.

I had a fun weekend. I went to a very sophisticated dinner party on Friday night. I was invited by my dear gay friend and his boyfriend.
I think I may have just stepped into a Top Billing episode. It was a mansion in Bryanston. A Mansion. I got lost trying to find my way back from the bathroom and had to use the internal intercom system they have in every room.
The cuisine (not food) was exquisite, tasty and would have made Jamie Oliver weep.
Good God - these gay boys are (dare I say) fabulous!
I nearly gave the one guy a very dramatic heart attack when I told him that I love sweet wine like St. Anna. It's lovely and cheap. R20 a bottle I think. R16 in my bottle store ;-)
Apparently, this is not the type of thing you tell a wine connoisseur and collector. He wouldn't have any of it and opened a bottle of fine Australian wine for me. I felt terrible that he had opened up a R500 bottle and didn't drink any. I finished the bottle all on my own. Good grief.
I finally went home at 2am and felt like a million dollars. They loved my hair, my shoes and we discussed our beauty regimes in detail. It was great.

Saturday was spent lounging around watched Janice Dickinson, The Bachelor and The Moment of Truth (these are my guilty pleasures and I really can't get enough.)
I had a Hollywood Themed Birthday party to attend and she had hired a Kareoke Machine. The birthday girl dressed as Tina Turner and gave us the best show with back up dancers and everything.
I had a jol. I dressed as Charlie Chaplin.
Cute, yes. Not so cute when you're driving in the traffic with a drawn on mustache and a bowler hat. I had the sexiest guy sidle up next to me in his car (giving me the look) and as I looked over (ever so seductively - I think) I suddenly remembered what I was wearing and went beetroot red. It was attractive. I'm sure.

The ultimate betrayal.

2009-01-30T16:24:00.005Z

How much can one person really handle? No really. I would seriously like to know that.

I've always believed that God doesn't allow someone to go through any more than they can handle.

I don't think I can take much more.

I have been betrayed by people I never in a million years would have thought that they'd betray me. I have heard things that have shocked me to the core. I. cannot. believe. this.

Who have I pissed off "up there"? Is this my karma for something? Really? I just don't get it, but I can't take much more and I have a feeling this is only the beginning of stories to come.

I am so hurt (that word "hurt" doesn't really explain how I feel - it is four lettered though) I feel shattered, my heart is so heavy I think it just may stop (sounds dramatic, but seriously) and I haven't been able to keep food down in a few days now.
I think I've become a break up bullimic. If there is such a thing.

I know this is dramatic and I will delete this post, but I can't scream and shout right now and this is my only avenue to really get it out.

I feel better now.

Go figure.

2009-01-29T13:42:00.003Z

Well...what a few days they've turned out to be.

I really have no words. You think you know people, eh? Well, well, well.

It really is rather interesting how truths always out themselves. Well...I guess the saying is true: Better now than never.

I will pick myself up, dust myself off and carry on with my dignity, my self respect and put myself together again as an even better, stronger woman.

Right now though, I want to eat tubs of ice-cream, listen to "break-up" music like Pink's So What, vent, scream and with all that said and done I REALLY AM OK!

I guess it's just going through the motions.

Weekend anyone?

2009-01-26T15:57:00.006Z

Good grief. I um...don't have words about this weekend. Seriously. It was completely out of character and manic. In fact even that description is tame.

I feel exhausted.

Friday night was um... Oh God. Where to start. So it all started off rather lovely...we went to a divine restaurant and had dinner and cocktails, like civilised human beings. Afterwards, we hit FTV Cedar. It was all lovely until coffee tequila reared it's ugly head. Oh. My. God.
It went completely pear shaped from there. Blondie 2 decided it would be "fun" to waterski though the fountain. As you do. "Weirdly" enough, she ended up falling on her ass and ended up at Olivedale Clinic.
She is now in a sling and it's not broken, but I personally think she needs a second opinion.
Anyway...I wasn't in my car (this NEVER ends well - at the time it makes sense to go in one car but at the end of the evening, I always curse that decision because I can't leave when I'm ready...I always say that I'll never do that again and what happens? It happens again.) so I couldn't even be at the hospital for her.
We were all supposed to go to the Meat Market called Billy the B.U.M.S.
I really am not a huge fan of this place.
Seriously. Men are just revolting. I know I shouldn't be surprised considering that I was at BB's but still....c'mon.
Is there some sort of perception that because it's Fourways/Sandton, all girls are gold diggers and impressed with your fancy schmancy car and monthly salary?
Seriously?
Right, so there I am sitting at a table (tired from dancing, you see?) when this guy comes up to Sugar and I.
"Hey there. I earn R30 000 a month, you girls should respect me."
"Pardon?"
He repeats this with extra emphasis on the "should".
"Oh. My. God. I just have to have your babies now! You must be an amazing man." I swooned.
He flashes a grin and decides that my sarcasm is a green light for him to sidle up next to me.
Dude.
His friend then joins us almost immediately and starts talking about his SLK Mercedes.
Later on, after a few more jaegerbombs and room spins I had this guy leer at me, burn me with a cigarette from his actions and try and pull in for a kiss. I turned my head and pushed him away. He then couldn't understand why I was the one being rude.
Oh yes. Baby oh baby. Please can I have some drunk, disgusting, sweaty man leer at me for a kiss.
I mean, after all... I don't even know what your salary is.

Sugar and I were feeling horribly drunk and I still had to fetch my car. So.
This wasn't embarrassing at all.
I had to call my parents at...wait for it....5am. Now. I love the fact that I let my hair down, but um. 5am?
That is NOT a Bondie thing to do. It really is completely out of character. 3am is doable every once in a while (seriously...every ONCE in a while) but 5am AND calling my folks. If I am going to do a big night, that's all fine by me but without the folks knowing about it.
It gave a whole new meaning to drunk dialling.

So. My dad and my sister came to collect me and then we went to fetch my car (my sister drove it home for me.)

Fabulous. It was terribly sweet but if I could have avoided that I would have.

I slept the entire day, felt very sorry for myself and then drove through to fetch Blondie 2 who was going to be sleeping at me so that we could get an early start on Sunday.
It was hilarious though considering that we all take having two hands for granted. I had to cut her burger into four so that she could pick it up with her one hand and eat it and I had to help her with her bra. No weird thoughts boys.

Sunday was Moving Day. It was weird going through all my things and packing them into boxes. My dad had hired a trailer for all my furniture and Sugar, Blondie 2 and I went through cupboards, drawers and every room figuring out what was mine, what I was keeping and what I was chucking.
I couldn't have done it without them and we made it "fun" by pretending we were on The Style Network's "Clean House" show. We would actually make a good team and I reckon it would be a good TV show! The SA Version! Hahaha!!
Afterwards, we decided we needed a drink. A stiff one. We went to Lonehill Capello's. It was pretty dead, which was suprising considering it was the Sunday Hang Out once upon a time!

These two boys came to us and asked us if the two empty chairs were available. The way they asked it, was as if they needed the chairs to move to a table they were sitting at. As soon as I said, "Not at all" they sat down. Um. OK.
They spent the time just complimenting us on our shoes, hair and dresses.

I found the humour in the fact that on Friday night I had been hit on by revolting men and on Sunday night I was being "hit on" by Gay Boys.

Lovely.

Chapters in my life

2009-01-23T13:24:00.005Z

This weekend involves:

Dinner tonight at a very beautiful, trendy restaurant.
Pilates.
A birthday party, where I am going to wear a new dress I bought and team it with my suicidal stilettos and dance the night away with my mates.

and then...

I'm moving all my furniture out on Sunday and I have all my mates and family coming to help me. I'm going to need a stiff drink or three afterwards, so the deal is that once we've moved and put my things into storage, we're going to go out and slurp cocktails.... they'll certainly symbolize the end of a chapter and the start of a new one.
I'm feelin OK about Sunday...but I don't know how brave I'll be on the actual day. Thank GOD for Special K, Blondie 2, Sugar, mom, dad and my sister who are going to be there!

I have received a few messages from someone and they have made me smile. It's good to know there is life after "death" :-)

2am

2009-01-22T13:27:00.008Z

I treated my mate Sugar and I (we're both going through break ups) to prawns last night. What was supposed to be one glass of wine, turned into three...or was it four? For me, one glass of wine is already a danger zone. For some reason I can drink plenty (well...I'm called Florence because I nurse my drinks) of mixed drinks or bottled drinks, even two or three cocktails and feel cool...but give me one measily glass of wine and I'm ready to shake my ass on the table with a "Yeeeehah!!" That would not have been appropriate at Adega. On a Wednesday night.

We ended up getting kicked out of Adega and moved onto the Corner House. Oh good grief. It is a house that has been converted into an Irish Pub and anything goes. If you're under thirty you're way too young and if you're dressed up like you're going to an FTV you are going to stick out like a sore thumb...a fashionable sore thumb. Dancing is not a group act...it's partnered up.
I can't remember the last time I was a) asked to dance and b) danced with a guys hand on my back with a few twirls and dips thrown into the mix.
It was fun. One of the things that freaked Sugar and I out, was the fact that the majority of the men there were old enough to be our dads and some of them our grandfathers. They all have hungry eyes and you know exactly what I mean by that. The worst was being winked at or my favourite, having this guy lick his lips in my direction. I wasn't sure if he was trying to put his dentures back in with no hands or if that was supposed to be some sort of "Hey baby..How you doin'?" pick up.
Ewww.

Anyway.

It is incredibly weird to be back at home. I haven't lived under my parents roof in four years. It is absolutely wonderful in some instances and in others, not so much. I am loving the fact that I have my mom and dad around. I haven't eaten this well or this healthy in ages and my dad brings me a cup of tea every single morning with his cheerful sing-songy "Good morning sunshine!"
My mom plays with my hair and gives me plenty of hugs. We sit watching Ugly Betty and Greys together and I'm just really enjoying the luxuries of being home. I haven't had to worry about what I'm going to cook for dinner, about buying dishwasher or Handy Andy and they've told me that I don't need to pay rent. God, I am lucky. I told them that at the moment I am really enjoying not having to be an "adult", but that it isn't unappreciated (I'm no spoilt brat) and that as soon as I can "breathe" again I will happily assist with things like cooking meals, buying groceries and so forth. I've been told not to be silly, but I can't just lounge around doing nothing..I just have to pull my weight or I wouldn't feel right (that and the fact that I may just used to it.)
My mom and dad are just so happy that I'm home and I wanted to cry out of happiness.

However, I am getting the sms' during the day like:
"Blondie, it's mom. Are you going to be home for dinner? I need to know how many steaks to take out of the freezer and how many vegetables to cook. Love you."

"Blondie...it's mom. I don't want to nag, but it's 01h30. What time will you be home? You do know it's raining out don't you? I hate you driving on the roads. Would you like dad to come and follow you home? This is not good for your body. Love Your No. 1 Fan."

(My mom has always called herself my No. 1 Fan and I could just gobble her up...she doesn't realise how much that means to me.)

It is awfully sweet, but I haven't had to think of these things in years and I feel like a selfish shit because I'm getting annoyed. When I stumbled in this morning at 02h00 my mothers bedroom lamp flicked on I got the "This is no time for a young lady to be coming home during the week" lecture.
I... um... have been doing this for years and I'm impressed that I'm home at 2am.

It's just huge adjustments all around, but I wouldn't have it anyway. My family are absolute angels and I am the luckiest girl in the world.

:-)

2009-01-20T14:05:00.004Z

I'm actually OK... I know that it sounds funny but I am doing a hell of a lot better than I thought I would be.
I think it's because I've been dealing with the fact that we were over for a while now.
I'm really glad things are amicable (well, as amicable as break ups can be) so that really helps. I feel guilty for feeling a little happy but I know that this is for the best and while most think I am devastated I am OK. No denial here, either.

I feel much better and went on a bit of a pampering session after gym this afternoon and had a facial and manicure. I feel all girly and lovely.

I'm focusing on my career, my friends, my family and myself now and I'm realising that that too is just fine :-)

Does this make sense?

2009-01-19T14:06:00.006Z

I feel like a fish out of water. I haven't been just Blondie for so many years. It's always been Blondie and her man.
I am having to relearn who I am, what makes me tick and loving to be on my own. It's only 6 days, but each day is different.
Everything reminds me of him and I have driven that way "home" every single evening, only to do a U-Turn and go back home. I also keep wanting to call him when I receive a piece of news etc... and I suddenly realise what I am doing in the middle of typing his number into my Blackberry. Everything is just very very odd but I know that it will take time.

I am stronger than I thought I would be, but with that said, this has been harder than I thought it would be. Does that make sense?

I don't know how to be single. I feel really pathetic in saying that and yet I don't feel pathetic in saying that either.
Does that make sense?

I guess I did things ass about face. While my mates partied away, snogged different men, slept with different men (safely) and basically enjoyed a single life in their early twenties, I was in a loyal, serious relationship. Now my mates are settling down and I am going to enjoy being single in my late twenties.
Weird.

I am sad and excited. Does that make sense?

This is a new chapter in my life and it is going to certainly be very interesting to see how the book finishes.

PS> I am going away on Thursday, Friday and Saturday for a shoot. It's a romantic shoot too. The timing is beautiful.
Still. It will be good to stay busy and have a change of scenery.

No Regrets

2009-01-14T15:55:00.005Z

I didn't believe that I would ever write a post like this. Ever.

I say that because I don't think it's really sunk in yet.
These are words that I never thought I would ever say again. Here goes.

I. am. single.

After five and a half years, I have no regrets. I do feel like someone ripped my heart out of my chest without anaesthetic.

I am crushed.

I know that it's over and that there is no turning back and I know that it is for the best, but it doesn't mean I'm OK with that or that it's any easier. It was amicable too. Again. This doesn't make it easier.

I have learnt (I always knew, really, but it's times like these that remind me to be grateful) that I have the most incredible support structure. My family is incredible and so giving, my friends have dropped everything to be by my side, complete with a bottle of wine and the person I work with has made me laugh and given me such encouragement that I wouldn't know how to get through work without him.

Each day at a time. It's not even 24 hours yet and yet I feel like it's been 24 years.

:-(

2009-01-13T15:06:00.002Z

Hey hey!! I'm back!

I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas and New Year! Happy Two Thousand and Divine.

Please forgive me. I'm going through something at the moment and staying strong. Trying to anyway.

I will be back to blog and catch up on your blogs as soon as I am ready.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year...see you in 2009!

2008-12-21T18:10:00.003Z

So it is that time of year when I say Goodbye.

I am going on holiday and so is my blog. I'll only return to it in January when I am hopefully well rested, bronzed and cocktailed out :-)
I. cannot. wait!

I leave for the coast tomorrow at 6am. I have to still pack and do the wax etc, but I am just so excited about, I cannot put it into words!

Thank you so much for a wonderful blogging year (it's my first full blogging year) and quite frankly, I don't know what I would do without it. It's my space to share, vent, question and entertain myself too by reading your blogs! Thank you for the support, love, the friendly comments and most of all for being friends!

I really hope you have a really wonderful Festive Season! MERRY CHRISTMAS!!

I just have a truly good feeling about 2009 and I hope you celebrate in style! May it be a prosperous one for you and your loved ones!

Dread

2008-12-18T05:15:00.003Z

I've been putting it off, but I'm running out of time. I need to take the plunge and plunge straight into the chaotic malls. Help me.
I need to still do my Christmas shopping. I know! I haven't even started. I know!!!
I am dreading it! Now, don't get me wrong. I'm not dreading the buying part (I love giving gifts) but I am dreading throwing myself into the lions pit of hurried shoppers, irritable shop assistants and crying kids.
Oh and I have to still do that bikini shopping. Aaaaaaahhh!!!!!!

If I only I didn't have a personal "NO GIFT VOUCHERS" policy. It might change this year. Just saying.

Rockstar Living

2008-12-17T04:33:00.006Z

I am making myself feel better (making excuses?) by telling myself that I'm still young, that I had to do it once and that I am a little rockstar.
Ha!
I am seriously struggling this morning.
I have pulled an all nighter. I got a phone call from Shaun Morgan (Seether) and it went like this:
SM: Blondie!
BB: You're back!!
SM: I arrived from LA last Thursday and I want to know where you're taking my manager and I.
BB: Um. Dude, I have to work tomorrow morning.
SM: And?
BB: Um...OK...

So Shaun, his manager and I went out last night. We partied up a storm, drank copious amount of alcohol and when I looked at my watch it was time to go to work. I feel like I'm dying.
STUPID STUPID STUPID.

I have never been so grateful for Red Bull, Coffee and apples. I do however, have the shakes, my eyes are feeling like someone is constantly pouring sand into my eye sockets and I basically want to curl up and die.

The life of a Rockstar. I would never cope. :-)

Naughty Naughty

2008-12-16T04:20:00.002Z

I didn't go bikini shopping. I didn't have the strength physically and certainly not emotionally! LOL

I have the funniest two videos for you. EVER. I cried with laughter through these!! I just had to share them with you!
Do yourself a favour and watch them... hilarious!

Shit and Shopping.

2008-12-15T04:44:00.006Z

There is NOTHING like waking up to a funky smell. If I was in a cartoon it would be like that green smoke wafting through to my nostrils and let me tell you, this smell would certainly singe nostrils hairs.
I should have woken up properly when The Garden Terrorist (aka my gorgeous dog) was restless and kept nudging my hand in the middle of the night. I just rolled over. Oh I'm so so sorry this morning. That smell woke me. I opened my sleepy eyes and out the corner of my eye I saw mounds of steamy diarroeah and vomit. The Garden Terrorist is not a small, lap dog (I've never been a fan of those that look like rats or are Paris H/handbag sized.) either. He is a monster of a dog who sleeps at the base of our bed. I wretched at the piles of shit all over the place. Oh and it's runny. Really runny.
Guess who has to clean it up? Me. My man had a plane to catch and acted like he had to rush, rush, rush.
I think I'll hang an air freshener around my nose, suck a breath mint and don gloves. Oh kill me.

Today I am going to do the thing that is dreaded by any woman who isn't a supermodel.
I could think of a few things I would rather do, like gargle with glass or perhaps I could stick toothpicks through my eyes balls.
Today I am going bikini shopping. Oh it pained me to type that. You have to try on swimwear. You just have to. But why do we have to try on swimwear in revolting, unflattering change rooms? Why oh why do stores do this to us? Revolting, bright light that shows every lump and bump and 101 mirrors so we can see ourselves in every angle. Awesome. Oh and my best? The bikini's sold as one. I can't handle that. I need a bigger top and a smaller bottom. Not both in one size. Oh no. Those beady eyed sales reps are there waiting for me.
"Sorry. You can't seperate them!" is normally whined at me.
To find one that fits and turns me into a Victoria Secret Goddess is well...I'm still looking.

I can hardly contain myself with the excitement. I now understand the purpose of the Hip Flask. I need to get sloshed so that I can drink myself pretty!

Below is the wish. Below that is most likely the reality. Kill me.

Wish me luck.

I heart Britney.

2008-12-11T14:14:00.006Z

So it's no secret. You can scoff all you like.

I am a HUGE Britney Spears Fan. Now hang on, I was about 15 when she came onto the music scene, so you could say that I have grown up with her.
I adore her and I knew that the comeback would happen...yes I did. My man always rolls his eyes when another Britney song comes out.
My reaction is normally: "Aw, I love it!"
My man's is normally: "Have you ever NOT liked something Britney's done?"
Me: "She can do no wrong."
Man: "She shaved her head."
Me: "She has a pretty head."
Man: "You are ridiculous."
Me: "I heart Britney."

I can't help myself...I have all her albums and need to get her new one, Circus. I hardly contain my excitement. I'm going to pop it on the iPod and sing along on the beach. Oh yes I am.
Am I dork? Possibly.

Anyway...
Here is a video and I think it's rather sweet!

I'm done.

2008-12-09T12:39:00.002Z

I am exhausted. Done. Over it. I seriously need a holiday. I have finally put in leave. I can hardly wait!

I have two weeks and then I piss off down to the coast. I'm going to learn how to scuba dive and I'm going to get an overdose of Vitamin D hopefully that comes in the form of a bronzed tan.

I can't wait to smell the salty spray of the ocean, feel the beach sand between my toes and to finally be able to relax without having to worry about what I should be doing.

I am literally ticking the days off of my calendar. I'll be away from the 22nd December 2008 - 4th January 2009.

THIS is where I'm going:

PS> Thank you for your comments in my previous post - I don't know what to say really...I am just incredibly grateful for your support and kindness...I just don't know what to say other than Thank You!

I'm PHAT!

2008-12-07T19:09:00.007Z

I had one of the best weekends. I'd like to say that I partied it up VIP style until I pissed champagne, but instead I didn't move. Ok wait, I did but only for three reasons.
1. To go to the loo.

2. To go to the fridge.

3. To collect deliveries of health food.

I was exhausted on Friday - well, you read below so I got home and chilled. I watched TV and finally dragged myself to bed. On Saturday morning, I showered and instead of getting dressed, I got back into my pajamas. I can't remember the last time I did that!
I didn't get out of my pajama's until Sunday evening, when I showered and then put a new pair on. Lovely. I literally sat on the couch, alternating between writing on my laptop and watching the idiot box I lovingly call the TV.
Honestly, it was just the best. No make-up, no hair products and pure laziness. God it felt good.

I received an email from a pseudonym [of course] and it hit a nerve. It really, really did. I probably shouldn't be sharing this (considering that some of you know who I am) but I have had it and my blog is my place to vent. I just need to get this out!

The email basically says (in a nutshell - because it's a few paragraphs) that they can't understand how I'm in the industry I'm in when I am not "fat" but chubby. I'm not a good role model to women who want to get into this industry and blah blah blah blah.
{It did go on to say that they love my work and that they think I'm a natural talent etc...
Um...Thank you for the backhanded compliment then .}

I am fucking hurt. I should just shrug it off, have a good laugh (maybe a little cry) and then go about my merry way.

Let me set the record straight.

I have been diagnosed with sugar intolerance. I am border line diabetic and am doing my best to not become diabetic. Basically my body doesn't know what to do with sugar and instead of turning it into energy, it turns it into fat. I am left feeling lethargic and I'm left gaining weight.
I am not obese. I am just not your skinny size 0 and quite frankly I would never want to be.

Yes. I am in an industry that is image conscience. Um...I've been in it for a few years now so that would make me well aware. I am in this industry because I love entertaining. I cannot begin to explain how much I love what I do and I can't imagine doing anything outside of the industry. I get so excited to go in, do a good job and see how I can improve myself every.single.day!
The fact that it puts me in the public is rather overwhelming for me and I don't really understand it. My man once summed it up beautifully: "This is not Hollywood. We don't have celebrities, but we do have public profiles whether you/we like it or not."

A role model? No pressure. Don't you think a role model would be someone healthy, who has goals and is hard working and ambitious? I don't quite understand...are you saying that I'm not a role model because I'm not stick thin? Well in that case. Thank God!
If you're going to use loaded words like "Role Model", well then, I'd rather be a role model for young women who want to make something of themselves regardless of how they look. I'd like young women to look at me and think: I, too can do it! I too, can dream and have those dreams come true and I don't have to look a certain way!

It is devastating to me because I have put on several kgs and I can't quite seem to fit into clothes I used to. I'm a woman and I am personally very sensitive to this. Ask one woman if weight has ever been a hang up. 99% of women have hang ups about their weight, even Heidi Klum.
Has it hurt my self esteem? Yes. Not drastically but I. am. human. Trust me, I'd love to be the size I was and I'm working at it. Weight gain is quick...weight loss takes effort and it takes time if you want it to be healthy and stay off.
It's not great hanging around skinny girls at these functions feeling like a frump, but I'll never let my weight define who I am as a person.

I am irritated that I have never had to watch what I eat...perhaps to my detriment later on in life considering I have been diagnosed with this condition; and now I am having to. I am not used to having to make a concerted effort watching what I put in my mouth and it has been a bit of a shock. I struggle with it and it is a constant battle considering that I could be the President of the Sweet Tooth Society. No more sweets, chocolate, sugar, bread and so on...

Am I making an effort though? Hell yes! I want to be healthy and I want to do my best to prevent diabetes.
I am working my ass off in gym (boxing) and I am starting pilates/yoga.

I don't need to explain myself (after all of this) but I have had it. I'm tired of being called a Blob by tabloids. Fuck off. I am a person who has feelings.
Quite frankly this email has been the most judgemental, uneducated email I have probably ever received. It hurt me to the core.
I didn't respond. In these cases: "The best response is no response" - more advice from my man

This is a stupid post but it has made me feel better. I'll probably delete it tomorrow afternoon.

Oh and I've lost 4kgs so far, so bite me!

End. Now.

2008-12-05T13:07:00.006Z

I'm talking about this day.
I'm in a foul mood. I'm not a moody person either, so you must know.
Let's start. I woke up this morning and for some reason the normal morning person that I am seemed to disappear. I woke up feeling moody and absolutely shattered. I was in bed at a reasonable hour last night too so there is no proper reason. I am however, feeling the end of year and the exhaustion has hit me.
I also continued reading the Mushy Peas on Toast book and I am now officially on page 133. I cannot put it down.

I finally realised how lazy I was being (total slob actually; considering it was midday) and got up to make myself some tea. I went down to find my very own Mary Poppins (our domestic worker) standing outside with her arms folded and a sad look on her face.
Now last week, I had left R800 in an envelope on my coffee table for a payment that needed to be made. When I came the next afternoon to get the envelope, it was gone. I looked everywhere and it hasn't turned up yet. I casually asked MP if she had put the envelope that was on the coffee table anywhere. She has a tendency to bunch things together or put things in piles or move things all together. I once found our cell phone chargers tangled together in my underwear drawer..so she has a tendency to do things like this. It didn't occur to me that she had taken it. This is a woman who once phoned me to tell me she had eaten 3 Marie Biscuits from the packet. She is incredibly honest and sure, there are only 2 of us and MP so it has to be in the house somewhere.
I asked her if she had put the envelope of money somewhere or if she knew where it was. She said she hadn't. I asked her if she was sure and then continued to look myself.
Apparently she thought I was accusing her of being a thief and she was very unhappy. She started crying and I was completely perplexed. Um...
I had to calm her down and tell her that I hadn't accused her, I was merely asking if she had put it somewhere else like she does with my post, my necklaces and earrings, my chargers, my car keys etc...
She was so upset because she thought that we were cross with her and she didn't want us to think that she had taken it. So I had to reassure her and she assured me that she would look thoroughly.
I know I'm going to sound like an insensitive bitch right now, but
a) I wasn't in the mood for this.
b) I don't know how money can disappear when it is only my man and I, but I know deep down she didn't take it.
She's a sensitive little Mary Poppins, that's for sure. I felt even more exhausted after that.

I then realised that I had to go to the bank before they close. Yay. My favourite.
I rushed off and strangely enough had to stand in long, winding queues. I was getting annoyed because people clearly don't use deodorant and I couldn't breathe, this woman in front of me kept chewing a large piece of chewing gum really loudly. She kept smacking it with her lips and popping it with her teeth. I wanted to smack her on the lips and make her teeth fall out. Nicely.
I finally got the front of the queue to deposit and draw and they told me that I was going to have to go to that queue over there. I looked at where this woman was pointing and felt my heart sink. That queue was double the queue I had just been sitting in. I finally got to the front of that one and there was a problem with something or other and I was going to have to come back tomorrow. I burst into tears. I actually couldn't believe it and had one of those out of body moments where I was looking back at myself saying: "Oh my God. You are crying and you're not even being discreet. Jesus. People are staring at you. Oh shit - look at you...you're blubbering now. Why are you crying anyway?"
Thing was, the more I knew I should hold in my exhaustion and frustration, the more I couldn't hold back the tears. The poor Indian man looked at me with absolute horror. He handed me a tissue and I blew my nose too. I am not dainty when I blow my nose. I sound like an elephant on heat mating a fog horn. It's totally unfeminine, really loud and attention grabbing (not in the good way.)
The worst part? Having to hold my puffy, red head held high as I walked out of the bank and feeling the heat on my back as everyone stared after me.

I got to the office and got a call from the same Indian man, apparently I left my bank card there too and he's not working this weekend. I told him to leave it with someone reliable and I would be back to get it tomorrow. Awesome.

This weekend had better be lovely. I hate being moody and quite frankly, I don't know what's going on.

PS> I did have a good laugh just now.
"A" (who loves her blind pug and who I'm going to call Camera Girl considering she is most likely going to feature a lot. She's too funny not to.) was in the middle of a sentence when she stopped and said:
"Fuck. Sorry. Your eyes look just like beer bottles."
"What??"
"No...I mean...I've just never realised it, but they're the colour of a brown beer bottle...it's really pretty! No seriously! That clear, pretty, sparkly brown beer bottle colour."
"Like a Castle?"
"Ja. It's a good thing."
"Um..."

Tours and Waxes

2008-12-04T08:59:00.003Z

It is always fascinating travelling in a car with colleagues. Especially funny and entertaining colleagues. I was with 2 of them. We were driving back to the office, when A started jumping up and down in the backseat. I have never seen someone get so excited about driving through the area she lives in.
"Oooh oooh ooooh! My house is down there. Aww, we could always blow this and go and have tea and cake at my house instead. Who is keen? My pug would love it."
G and I looked back and packed up laughing. "Your pug would love it?"
"Well she's blind, but I know she would. Seriously."
We continued to get a quick tour.
"This is my hood, people. Seriously don't mock it. Oooooh, I had my first snog there and I vomitted into those pot plants...right...THERE! My ex ex ex lives down that road. My friend Michelle lives three roads down from that. Ooooh, I've egged that house. Hated her. She deserved the egg throwing and plant pinching episode. I used to live down that street..."
And so it went on. I think G was watching her from the rear view mirror and I was literally in hysterics. She was so excited about this and kept showing us arb places and things. Emmerentia and Greenside will never be the same for me ever again.

Blondie 2 and I spoke about waxing last night. We waxed lyrical I guess, about the painful ripping of hairs. Blondie 2 totally digs it. I would rather dive into a vat of boiling oil. OK. Maybe not, but that is how it feels. If I can avoid it, I will. We got talking about cookie waxing. I know. Girls!
Blondie 2 is obsessed with it. I had a painful experience and told her as much.
B2: "Obviously your first time is going to be sore. It's like sex. The more you do it, the less and less painful it becomes."
BB: "Nice. I still hate it. I mean seriously. How embarrassing. All my life to spread my legs for a female stranger who wants to chit-chat while spreading wax and momentarily ripping the Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh out of me."
B2: "Oh please. Seen one; seen them all. Besides, she's probably been doing this for years and she's going to be waxing 20 more cookies that day."
BB: "And that is what I'm afraid of. There is no beautician confidentiality code...I'm sure they all sit there chatting about them. Like: 'Oh my God. You should have seen this one...' you know?"
B2: "You have issues. No c'mon, it's great. Besides, I have to go. I haven't waxed in, like, 6 weeks and they are probably out to here!"
She indicated the length and I nearly fell off my chair.
BB: "Holy shit chick. WTF? Impossible...I mean, sure...if you're ghd-ing your pubes!"
That was it. We were hysterical over the mental images.

What happened yesterday...

2008-12-02T15:31:00.010Z

My sister is a culinary genius. I have never eaten such delicious Indian food in ages. It would actually put Indian restaurants to shame. I'm talking about my sister making her very own samoosas (who does that??) Indian rice, curry and Indian sweets from scratch.
There are 2 problems. The first problem is that I have to kill her now because I'm going to have to do an extra hour of cardio now. The second problem is that I will never be able to invite her around for dinner now, unless she has no problem with toasted cheese!

Oh and that reminds me. I have been manic today rushing around town to various meetings, listening to people who drone on and repeat themselves trying to explain what they would like me to do at their function and then smile like I'm the idiot. I even had the question of: "So, um...you're sure you can do this, huh?"
I should have said something like: "Oh my God. Are you sure? I mean I've never ever done this before...ever." Just to completely scare the shit out of them.
I'm always amazed. Um...you hired me for your function... why would you suddenly be questioning whether I can do something or not....um??
I had so much to do today and I felt like screaming: "Alright already!! I get it! Can we move the F&%# on? Time is money people; let's GO!"
Instead of either option, I smiled, nodded and assured them that everything would be just fine and their function would be just great.

I finally managed to race off to Woolies to look for the dress I saw in the catalogue. I need it for this function, you see? Anyways, there I am looking for dresses (in a major rush) and found a whole rack of gorgeous dresses. I started looking for my size in these dresses, holding them up, pressing them against my body (quick mental try on) and then folded a few options (not one of them was in the catalogue...in case you're wondering) over my arm to buy them. I turned around and bumped straight into a friend from school I haven't seen in over a year. We got chatting and I was wondering why she kept looking at me so strangely...strangely as in a small smile and a look in her eyes that I didn't quite get. I finally got what that look and smile was all about. I was standing in the Maternity section. How did I NOT see the sign? It was huge and had a lovely glowing woman standing with her manicured hands on her huge belly on it.
There go the rumours.

I went through to support Mushy Peas on Toast for her book launch last night. I think it is an amazing thing to have accomplished and I heard that she always wanted to have a book published before 30! Well done babe!! I am so impressed and uber proud!! I had a jol too with you and the gang ; although I wasn't loving you guys this morning after those G & T's. I got to meet a few bloggers last night and it is always fascinating and fun. Chester Pillow was actually the person I cursed this morning...my head was feeling just lovely after the G&T's. It was fun Ches...thanks dude!
I got home last night and read your book until my eyes literally closed (admittedly I only read for 15 minutes) and the book hit the ground, ultimately waking me up. I am on Chapter 2 and I'm loving it! Sheer entertainment!
Well done Peas...I am definitely a GROUPEA and I have put an order out because all my gal pals are getting your book for Christmas :-)

Positively negative.

2008-12-01T14:17:00.008Z

It's World AIDS Day today and our company arranged for confidential testing to be done for those who would like to know their status.
It takes 5 minutes and you get your results within a few minutes. It's amazing actually. So Blondie 2 and I went down stairs to get the test done. As we're waiting to go in with the nurse, we both looked at each other with the look of: Good grief...why are we doing this? I mean sure: "Know your status" sounds cool...but how cool could it be if it turned out to be positive?
Which WOULDN'T be a very positive thing at all.
I suddenly felt my mouth go very dry, my heart was pulpitating and my hands were sweating. My mind felt like it was on steroids too. Could I be? Oh dear God. It's not really possible, but then again... How do you get HIV again? I mean, I know this piece of knowledge, but at the time it dissappeared. I know I was on Anti- Retroviral Drugs for 2 weeks about 5 years ago because I helped a man in a car accident and got his blood all over my hands, which I discovered had open cuts on them from the glass in the car. That was a freak out. I had to wait like 2 days for the results and didn't sleep much. They also told me that I should be tested 6 months later to double check, but I never did. Forgot about it. SHIIIIT!!!
Well, that little piece of information popped into my head today and I sat there going: Oh shit. WTF!! What if.. Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit. The sex thing isn't possible considering my man and I are practically married. BUT...what if he's been.....Nah!!!
Oh dear God, hurry up nurse let's just do this. So I go in, get my finger pricked, drop the droplet of blood onto what looks like a pregnancy test. She then gets me to fill out a bunch of forms for confidentiality etc... I kept looking at it, so she took it away and put it on the seat next to her. Um...surely 5 minutes have been and gone. Nope. Only 2 minutes had passed. She gave me pamphlets on how to lead a safe life etc... and all I could think was: "Shit. She's seen the result and now she's trying to council me. Crap. Why did I do this again? Yes. It's good to know your status. It is right? Oh c'mon already. Just give it to me."
She finally took the test off the seat and told me to take a deep breath. She was enjoying this. Melodramatic Sadist.

My drink got spiked on Friday night. At dinner. Awesome. My sister, Blondie 2 and I were given a shot of Rasberry Vodka by the owner and 15 minutes later we were feeling completely plastered. We had drank one glass of sangria each. That was it. It was awful. We felt ill, plastered, heavy limbs and by the time we got home Blondie 2 and I passed out on the couch. We aren't 100% sure if our drinks were spiked, but it was a horrible feeling. So that was my rivetting evening...it was over by 11pm - I think.

Going over to the family tonight...my sister is a total genius in the kitchen -she always amazes us with incredible dishes. Tonight we're going to feast on Indian food...bring on the pappadoms!

I'm a Ballerina Girl, name calling and liquid dinners!

2008-11-28T14:49:00.003Z

I got to meet Lionel Richie yesterday. He stopped by to visit me. Me, as in the office. Potay-toes, Potah-toes. He told me that I was 3 times a lady and that after seeing me he really did want to dance on the ceiling. I know. It's hard having that affect on super famous people. Sigh. I offered to babysit his granddaughter, Harlow and that if Nicole Richie was feeling lonely because her "BFF" Paris Hilton was tarting herself around the world, I'd happily share a few cocktails with her.
He laughed at me. I thought it was funny too, but I was being serious. Oh well.

So I got the People Magazine (before it comes out next Tuesday) and there's an article about:
The Names Men Call Women.
Here are the different options.
WOT = Woman On Top - someone who is domineering.
T&G = Touch & Go - one night stand chick
LOD = Live off Daddy - enough said.
LOL - Lady of Leisure - high maintenance
WWI = Woman with Issues - trouble and lots of tears
SCB = Sensitive Cry-Baby - most difficult to manage because she believes everyone is always attacking her.
DMH = Dedicated Man Hater - feminist.
WTS = Way Too Smart - threat to men in the workplace
TTH = Tries Too Hard - they're desperate and short of throwing their arms around mens knees.
BWN = Best When Naked - they have a terrible laugh, they're dumb, no sense of humour, can't hold an intelligent conversation but they're BWN.
B&D = Bitchy & Dangerous - spiteful and will make you pay for every one of your mistakes.
CWA = Comes With Anchor - biological clocks are a tick-tocking.
PDB = Perfect Dumb Blonde - airheads and naive.
NTB = Not Too Beautiful - OK looking women with a bad outlook on life.
JNI = Just Not Interested - are the girls who give off "back off" vibes.

Dude...these are hectic. So, um...what? Should we all strive to be PMM?
Careful because that M at the end can also become an S. Just saying.

I am so super excited for tonight. It's a night out with the girls. I haven't actually spent some good time with my mates lately and I can't wait to enjoy a liquid dinner of cocktails. PLUS....my sister is coming! She has been hectic with her thesis, internship, exams and group assignments. It is not an exageration when I say I haven't seen her for longer than 15 minutes in 3 months. I got a call from her to say she's coming tonight, so we're celebrating her distinctions. She graduates Cum Laude. I am so bloody proud of her!! Tonight is going to be a JOL!!! WOOOOHOOOO!!

2008-11-27T08:09:00.003Z

I met Jennifer Garner last night for dinner and drinks. Ok, well, I think Mushy Peas looks just like her. What a doll. She is hilarious and fun and an amazing listener and story teller. I literally felt as if I had known her for years, regardless of my stalking her blog. I did gush and I did embarrass myself but then again whats new? It was fantastic to meet the person behind the pseudonym and she is as brilliant and fun as she is in her blog. You know the internet and blogging world can be a funny thing. It's very easy to sit infront of a PC screen and be whoever you want to be, have an alter-ego, hide behind something that is safe and free from judgement or whatever. Just ask most peadophiles. It could have been one of those weird moments where you're sitting there going: Dude! How is it possible for someone to be so cool and then you meet them and it's literally a case of 'Oh shit! Who IS this person? What are we going to talk about?'
I've had that before on an email chat with someone I was doing business with. He was witty and hilarious and confident and when I actually met him he was this introverted guy who couldn't string two sentences together orally.
I must say meeting Peas was fabulous. I reckon that date 2 is a must and will probably involve more alcohol (we were trying to be polite...that, and that I didn't want her to think I would take advantage. Kidding! Ok seriously, we were being responsible adults* knowing we had early starts) and some dance moves that will look like I'm doing the sprinkler and shaking the dice, while Peas will be the bonafide hip hop dancer. You'll be able to tell. Trust me.

I've been up early. Early as in: before the sun has risen. There should be a law against that. As a result I now feel as if I've been awake for so long that it should be home time and not 10am. I don't think another cup of coffee will help. I am yawning and too lazy to cover my mouth. It's attractive, especially after eating a bran muffin. Most people in the office today are just too bright and perky. They're giving me a headache. That shrill: "Goooood Mooorning!!!!!" is ringing out all over the place. It could be one of two things. They either got some last night or their holiday is around the corner. Just saying.
Weird thing is, I'm generally a morning person. The end of the year will do that to you.

OK and some good news (think positive Blogshell) I got a message from the person I've been hoping to hear from regarding my audition, which didn't go as I had hoped. The stress, the nerves, the pressure and the intensity of such a show is overwhelming if you haven't done anything like it before.
They said to me that they have feedback for me, which will be given soon and that there is some work to do and lots of intense dedication to put in before we get there.
Happiness. That's a good thing. It certainly isn't a: Look, this has been fun. Don't call us; we'll call you!
I am more than prepared to put in the hard work and dedication and I relish this opportunity so I am excited that the door is still slightly ajar and not slammed shut. I'm putting positive vibes out there.
This dream of mine just HAS to come true. I have dreamt about this particular thing since I a teen. It was the goal I set for myself in this industry and just the fact that I've come this far is pretty mind blowing.

Right. Coffee machine is calling. So is my bed. We can't have our cake and eat it can we?

* Don't snigger.

Detectives, Proper-like and a Date.

2008-11-26T14:02:00.004Z

Not all cops are bad and corrupted, evidently. I am so impressed. I spent most of my evening at the Randburg Police Station last night. I'd like to be hardcore and very Hollywood and say I was being booked, but instead I was a witness. I was the witness to the accident my man and I had on the 14th.
We have been called every single day with an update of the case and they finally tracked down the son of a bitch. It turns out this drunk asshole is quite a popular boy with the police. He has a charge of assault laid against him. Apparently he left this chick for dead. They're also investigating how he got off and how he wasn't charged with attempted murder. Nice guy.
They couldn't arrest him without a witness statement aka me. I think the guy has been arrested this morning, but we'll no doubt get a call later.
I am uber impressed.

Today I decided to do things a little differently. I decided to stop being a lazy cow and do things the proper way. I didn't call 082 110 when I needed a number and pulled out the dusty phonebook. I forgot how heavy those things are. I even had to go through the alphabet in my head when looking up a name. Don't ask.
I decided to phone instead of sms. I actually do phone a lot, but generally an sms in easier.
I booked a table at a restaurant like a sophisticated woman instead of just rocking up and pleading (sometimes squeezing cleavage) for a table.
*blondie 2 is here*
She just came in and wrote that now...clearly NOT doing things the right way, because she has her own blog. Now she's looking at me like I'm mean. Get over it. ;-)
Anyway, back to my blog.
I wired up a hi-fi all on my own and only looked at the manual once, which doesn't count.
I sewed a button back onto my jacket instead of ignoring the gaping hole.
I let my hair dry naturally. Ok, this one was really because the idea of using a hair dryer in this heat was unbearable. I got out of a cool shower and 10 minutes later had to dry myself off again. I applied my make-up and 15 minutes later it had melted. My mascara was on my cheeks and my lipstick was on my chest. Pleasant AND attractive.

I have a date tonight. Not with the man. Ooh la la. Relax. It's with a woman. OK wait. This is sounding terribly wrong. Although it does feel like blind date. We told each other what we're wearing so we'd recognise each other. I even asked her if she wanted to have dinner with me.
Oh good grief.
Now I know that I am going to make most of you jealous. Haha. I mean...sorry about that. I am meeting Mushy Peas On Toast for dinner tonight. Yes I am. I think I'm probably going to give her the biggest squeeze and gush about her blog and how she inspired me and go on. Basically, I am going to seriously embarrass myself. Nothing that a bottle of wine wont numb. :-)
I cannot wait.

Handle the pressure?

2008-11-25T08:26:00.002Z

I feel like that father pacing up and down outside a maternity ward. I am anxious and my heart has a very weird sort of beat. I feel like that love sick teenager who has a crush on a boy and waits by the phone. My heart nearly stops every single time my phone rings. I hate private numbers. I generally don't answer them, but I am now. I'm hoping for the call.
"Blogshell...we see potential in you and we're going to give you another opportunity. You've got it!"
Instead, it's the bank telling me I need to pay my credit card or some awful woman calling me to sell me vacuum cleaners. Planet Fitness Gym also called me to tell me all about their wonderful specials trying to entice me to join.
Every private number that I have answered has been everything BUT the call.
I can't take the pressure.
I'm trying to be as positive as possible after a very, um, interesting experience. The thing is, after the taste I got and the amazing amount of knowledge I gained; I just want to do more and more and more.
These are some of the thoughts running through my brain:
Calm down. Breathe. Stop looking at your phone like a crazy woman with darty eyes. Staring that hard at your phone is not going to make it ring. Just relax. What's meant to be will be. If it is your destiny, it will be. They're busy and that's why they haven't called. Maybe it hasn't gone into edit yet. Chill out. What if it has and they are all killing themselves with laughter. Maybe I'll see this on YouTube under the heading: "Funniest clips EVER of wannabe presenters."
Oh dear God. STOP IT NOW! Busy yourself - it's not like you don't have anything else to do! Focus on something else. Why haven't they called. You are pathetic.

And so on...

I feel like the biggest nerd ever. I cannot get over how pathetic I have been over this. No really. I am even embarrassed of myself. I can't tell anyone that of course...well, I can't say it out in words. Thank God for my blog. Really.
It's just that I want this so badly and I don't want to repel it either. Argh.
STOP IT.

PS> I am annoying myself. I can imagine how annoying it must be to read this too. I promise to blog later this afternoon about something lovely and fun. I am going to gym with Special K later and I'm sure there'll be plenty to blog about then.

Thanks for the vent.

Mother City

2008-11-24T10:34:00.004Z

So...Cape Town was fabulous!! No seriously...I couldn’t have asked for better weather! It has been gorgeous with hardly any wind and a total scorcher! I even managed to get a sligh tan...OK a dress tan, but still.

I stayed in a hotel that made me wish I had had a video camera to show you what I meant. The receptionist at the hotel literally gave me creepy shivers. Think Psycho. He was almost identical to that. You know that really creepy look? The stare where one doesn’t blink and a smirk that makes you think he’ll eat you? He was like THAT!
I got my room key and started to walk around the corner, when I noticed I had turned too quickly and the lifts were further along. The hotel receptionist said in a really creepy, monotone way: “Have you seen the movie Wrong Turn? It’s a horror.” He then chuckled and I literally wanted to get out of there!
I have seen the movie and it freaked me out. I am a baby with horrors anyway. I screamed in Scream and Final Destination, which I don’t think can be classed as horrors. Enough said.
All I wanted was to get into my hotel room and sleep until the next call time. I looked out of the window and instead of seeing ocean, I saw an old eerie stone church. It added to the chill factor.
I was exhausted due to the fact that I been up since 3am to catch my 06h30 flight, and then arrived on set to shoot (my audition was an actual shoot for 3 days –how cool??) at 10h00 and only wrapped at 21h00. The exhaustion definitely helped me pass out quickly without having to think too much about the creepiness, but seriously. It is a great hotel for a thriller/horror movie.

The view of the eerie church.

I have never been so nervous in my life and I put a shit load of pressure on myself. Not great. So stupid of me actually, because thats the worse thing you can do...but hindsight is lovely. It was also my first experience and first time to do something of this proportion; so it was a definite challenge. It made me realise more than ever; that this is what I want to be doing. I fell in love with it. I just hope that they see potential in me and give me an opportunity to put all that I learned into practise. I am anxious now because I don’t actually know what’s going to happen. I don’t know if I will get called back, if I will get the opportunity and if my dream will come true? Everyone is telling me not to get my hopes up and to look at it as a lovely experience. Absolutely to the experience, but as far as getting my hopes up Too late. This is a dream that I cannot explain how much I want it to come true. Imagine going for your dream and not getting it. Crushing, right? Argh. Positivity all the way baby!
I wish I hadn’t been so shaky because it wasn’t a true reflection of what I know I am capable of, but I’m hoping and wishing and praying that there is something in the tapes that will make the Executive Producer love me! LOL

Right, so I now pray and keep visualising and keep thinking positive thoughts. I do believe that what is meant to be will be. I hope this is what’s meant for me. :-)

There are no words...

2008-11-18T16:34:00.003Z

I am so sorry I haven't posted - but things have been manic and this audition I went for has turned out to be quite fruitful! I am literally jumping up and down - I cannot contain myself. This will change my life, but I don't want to jinx anything and I certainly don't want to count my chicks before they hatch, so I don't want to get my hopes up too high.
Oh wait.
Too late!

I am going down to Cape Town for 3 days now and I am on an emotional rollercoaster of nerves, anticipation, excitement, self-doubt, self-confidence and then it starts all over again.

Wish me luck people, hopefully next week I'll be jumping and down popping champagne!

I.can.hardly.wait!

Drama follows me.

2008-11-14T16:32:00.004Z

Well, I went for the audition today. I have never been so nervous in my entire life. I didn't know whether I wanted to vomit or pee and possibly at the same time. Which would have been messy and embarrassing. Just saying.
I am holding thumbs because dudes. This will change my life. In a good way. It has also been a dream of mine since a little girl and the fact that I had the opportunity to audition for it, is amazing!

Anyways...My man and I had a car accident last night. We were leaving a venue to go home and as we approached a traffic light, which was red, we obviously slowed down until it turned green. We pulled out into the intersection to turn right, when I suddenly saw this car approaching rather fast. It was a red robot for him so I kept thinking he's going to slow down. I suddenly shouted to my man that this guy was going to hit us, so he sped up to turn the car completely. A red Golf slammed straight into the back of us. Thank God for safety belts. I got flung forward and would have gone straight through the windshield. Luckily my man turned in time or I would have been T-boned.
We pulled over and got out the car. I was shaking. The guy in the red Golf was so pissed he couldn't get out of his car and kept slurring at us that we had hit him. Unbelievable. He refused to give us his details so I scribbled (very shakily) down his registration number. We were going to call the cops, but we had both had 3 drinks each and even though we were totally sober, legally we would have been over the limit and sure, it wasn't our fault, but with SA's Metro Police you just never know these days. There is a 24 hour window to report an accident so we got back in the car and started to drive off. All of a sudden the red Golf was driving right up our ass and swerving left to right behind us. He eventually pulled up next to us and ran us off the road. I was incredibly nervous. He was screaming profanities and calling us drunk c**ts.
Rich.
We were forced into the emergency lane. In the interim, another innocent car was driving past when the asshole suddenly swerved away from us and missed the other car by centimeters. The other car stopped and so did the Golf. A screaming match entailed and eventually the drunk asshole sped off, nearly smashing into a traffic light. We exchanged business cards with the other car (our witness to his reckless driving) and went on our merry way.
My neck is a little sore this morning but nothing too serious.

We have reported the accident and our policeman friend has traced the registration and advised us to lay a charge of Hit and Run (even though he stopped, he refused to give us his details and there is a clause that still makes that a Hit and Run charge) and Reckless Driving.
It's amazing how quickly things can happen and potentially change a life/ end a life. I know it's dramatic and we're fine, but it could have been worse, especially if my man hadn't turned the car in time.

Here's to a chilled, safe, accident-free weekend
xxx

Singing AND dancing REQUIRED!!

2008-11-13T14:35:00.006Z

Blondie 2 absolutely cracks me up. I have never laughed so much in my life. I go and visit her last night and she is singing everything. I think I may have posted about living life as a musical (I'm too lazy to go back into my previous posts) but if I didn't, we have discussed how awesome life would be as a musical. Think about. You're sitting in a restaurant (like Mimmo's) having a conversation and then something strikes a theme for a song and all of a sudden you're singing and dancing and the entire restaurant knows the chorus (harmonising, of course) and everyone knows all the dance moves. Waiters could spin around with pastas and pizzas and we could use props like red and white checked table cloths, candle sticks and wne glasses. As soon as the song is finished, the dance moves work in such a way that you're back in your previous positions and you carry on with the rest of the conversation. This could apply to anything in life...imagine your business meetings bursting out into song, traffic jams, parties etc... Blondie 2 and I think this is a brilliant idea. We decided to try it in the office. I guess we're going to have to try harder. There was no buy in from anyone else and they all looked nervously at each other and then back at us. Perhaps they were trying to see if we were drunk. See? We ARE that much fun sober! We eventually stopped when we thought someone called security.
How great though? I loved the idea. I told my man and he said he would gnaw at his own pulse if the world turned into one big musical. Spoil spoilt.

Oh and speaking of Blondie 2. She has decided to start a blog. I was so excited I could hardly contain myself. She started it on blogger.com last week. Every single day I go onto her blog to see if there are any words other than: "No posts match your query. Show all Posts"
Nope. Still there. My excitement is wavering Blondie 2!
I have been nagging her to write something, anything but she keeps saying that she has work to do or something like that. Boring. Work is a 4 letter word. Just saying.
Sounds like a lame ass excuse to me.
I'm bugging her now. Bug bug bugging. When she does actually get round to blogging, I'll let you know.
It's called: http://www.stilettosinafrica.blogspot.com/ just so you know.

Blondie 2 -if you're reading this. The challenge is on. DO IT...SPLASH IT ON ME!

I have a suggestion. Amen.

2008-11-12T14:19:00.005Z

If you see a blonde trying to walk. It's me. I either look like I've pulled something or like I've had an amazing night of passion. Maybe... oh never mind.
I've actually just outdone myself in boxing class. No seriously. I cannot walk properly and I did class this morning. Imagine how I'm going to feel tomorrow morning. Good grief. We did 280 lunges today and as many squats. Ok? So you understand now. Stairs take a good 5 minutes and trying to sit on the loo is one hell of an experience. I have to literally hold onto the walls and slide down onto the toilet. Sorry for the TMI, but seriously, you don't understand my pain!
I have been stretching and it's still sore. I don't think I'm going to be able to walk tomorrow.
Whoever said: "No pain, no gain" should be shot. Really. I hate that they're right!

I had sushi lunch today with Special K and Boxing Girl. We were bitching about that very saying. I mean, life is generally hard. Can't their be something easy? No really. I spoke hypothetically (well, I guess thats pretty obvious) about being giving an option before we're born. Imagine if we were given a clipboard with various options we could tick off, before we were born. The Clipboard would say:

Life is hard, so I'm giving you a break. Tick one.

I'd tick this one:

#16.) Staying healthily skinny (within you height) will be effortless. You will be allowed to eat as many carbs, chocolates and other bad stuff as often as you like without so much as a kg nearing your thighs, stomach and hips.

I don't know...I think that would be fair. Each individual could tick off whatever it is that they never want to think about or have to put so much effort into.

Boxing Girl and Special K think I'm totally nutters and said things like: Breathing is easy.
That doesn't count. But thank you Lord because that would totally suck if we had to think about doing that all the time.

I thought my idea was genius. I'm letting G know about it...perhaps He can look into it for the future. Just a suggestion.

Sssshh...

2008-11-11T14:05:00.006Z

The weekend was helluva eventful - I had the best time! I laughed and drank and ate. Boy did I eat. I'll have to blog about that a little later because it was, like I said, eventful.

Right so, I have been feeling a little demotivated and well, to be totally honest completely and utterly flat. Yes, it's this time of the year and yes I need a holiday (I think I've stressed the last point enough) but I've been feeling really down. I'm just finished and tired and demotivated. I find myself feeling this at this time of the year purely because it always makes me evaluate my life. I look back and think either: "Great year!"; "Gosh, it's been sweet and sour!" or I think "Good grief. End already."
It's been sweet and sour for me this year. It also makes me think about where I am going, what I am doing and what opportunities are around the corner for me to either create or sieze.
So, with that said, I figured I could either wallow in self pity or do something to get myself out of the negative space.
Anyways, I know some of you sceptics are going to roll your eyes, but hear me out.

I decided to pop The Secret DVD on this morning and watch it. For some personal reason, this always makes me feel better and makes me feel like I can create my own destiny, opportunities etc and just makes me feel motivated again. I started writing down everything that I am grateful for and what my goals are.
I was in the middle of watching the DVD and writing my list when I had to pause it to answer my phone.
It was a good friend/colleague of mine who gave me some incredible news. I have an audition tomorrow for something that has been a dream of mine since 15 - in fact when I was getting into the industry I stated that I would absolutely LOVE to do XYZ.
I now have an opportunity to go for it. Dude. I am so utterly excited and yet at the same time I really don't want to jinx anything.
I was just freaked out and had goosebumps because it was really strange considering the circumstances. I know, right? You damned sceptics! I know you're thinking it's like one of those bogus emails of: send this to 203 of your friends and in 4 hours your wish will come true...but dude...goosebumps. Oh well, I was chuffed and weirdly enough, I'm feeling a lot better too! LOL

Cross all things crossable please! No. Seriously. Grab a Troll, a four leaf clover, whatever and any other good luck charms you have lying around and send them my way!

Oh alright! I'll have another one!

2008-11-07T14:06:00.005Z

I love spontaneous evenings. A mate of mine sent me an sms saying: Hey Blondie! Why don't you pop round for a quick drink after work? Let's meet at Tanz Cafe!"
So I thought, why not?
I am disillusioned when it comes to thinking any drink after work will be quick? The intention is there, but we all know how it goes. One drink turns into: "Aw c'mon! Just one more!" and before you know it you're clinking glasses with everyone and knocking back shooters. Evil.
I also didn't realise that I was going to be rocking up at a place where a CD Launch was taking place. This always seems to happen to me. I know that I'm going to go straight home, so there's no real effort in appearance. No sleek hair, no proper make-up and definitely no heels or cute outfit. I rocked up in slops and a sundress with my wash-and-go hair.
I walked straight into a media frenzy. Photographers and music industry members were all chilling out waiting for Paul E. Flynn to get up on stage to rock out. Oh well, fuck it, I'm gonna have a drink and leave. Immediately.
Ha! I got home at 1am this morning after drinking copious amounts of jaeger with Barney Simon and Cito from Wonderboom. Louise Carver (she's fabulous) sang a duet with Paul E. Flynn and they were amazing together! I felt bad when Louise sat down at our table and ordered a bottle of water. Dude. Talk about feeling ashamed as I swig back my Savannah Light.

I am feeling a little rough today and I missed boxing class. Ahem. Monday is a new day.
I don't actually know what I'm doing this weekend. I like it that way. Go with the flow and see what happens. I am hoping to sleep the weekend away but you just never know!

A Decade of me

2008-11-06T11:17:00.004Z

I wrote a meme about my Decade. It was probably the longest post I have ever written and I've deleted it. I know one person read it and that's cool, but it suddenly occurred to me that there is way too much information in here. I'm a very open person and that can be detrimental. I'm glad I wrote it and I've kept it on file for myself. I think this was more of a personal thing for me to reflect. Whoever started the meme is genius. I have also realised I don't actually know HOW to be impersonal or discreet. I wrote my full story out (in detail), which took me a few hours to do and it probably would have taken you a good 15 minutes to read.
LOL

I have deleted the post and started again with less info...you will see how I struggle with that considering there is still a lot of info here...but hey! This is ME!!

1998: I was 15 years old and took subjects that would help me be a doctor one day. I sucked dreadfully a maths and science. All I wanted to do was entertain and I knew my calling was to do that. I was a cultural child who took part in singing, drama, public speaking, debating etc... I also made the mistake of saying: "I'd never been drunk before" and my lovely friends ordered me 8 double shots of tequila. I was so ill that I was close to having my stomach pumped and I have never touched and will never touch tequila again.

1999: I was a true Sweet Sixteen: Never been kissed before. I turned sixteen and a month later I met drama boy. My first kiss was lovely and teenage giddiness set in. I started dating him. We dated for over a year and things changed when he wanted to sleep with me. I didn't want to...I wanted to wait and he got so mad.

2000: I was in Matric. All my friends and all his friends knew weeks before I did that he was going to dump me. He did and I was devastated. My first boyfriend and my first breakup. I wanted to tell my best male friend that I had feelings for him. My best girl friend encouraged me and then proceeded to make out with him the night I was going to tell him. I met a lovely, gorgeous boy who was in Post Matric and we started dating. He swept me off my feet and we hade such fun. I matriculated and couldn't wait to start the journey to my career I had dreamed about for ages.

2001: This is my most eventful year. I started studying BA Journalism. I found out that my grandfather in Europe had passed away. The last time I saw him was 1992. I was 9. I mourned more for the loss of not having known him. I was entered into a Beauty Pageant and made it to the Top 10. My self esteem was picked up and I met 2 of my closest friends I have today. Special K and JB. Post Matric Boy broke my heart and I never knew why he broke up with me out of the blue. I never saw him or spoke to him again and always wondered what had happened. I found out this year after physically bumping into him. I heard everything that I had hoped to hear 7 years ago. 7 years too late. 2 months after the break up, I was involved in a horrific car accident with JB and Pageant Boy. Our car rolled, I had to be cut out of the car and the paramedic thought my neck might be broken. All 3 of us walked out of there with sever whiplash and other injuries. We had survived something that no one should have.
My grandmother (I was closest to her) was diagnosed with Pancreatic Cancer and she died 3 months later. Her husband died suddenly too a month before she did. It was crazy. I failed 3 1st year subjects. I did however start with a company in order to start paving my career path way. I was 18 years old when I started. I also started Designer Boy around this time. I had met him at the CD store I worked at on weekends.

2002: Second year varsity. I was entered into my universities RAG Queen Beauty Pageant. I made the Top 20, then the Top 5 and I won Miss Enthusiastic (don't laugh) and was chosen as the People Choice Miss RAG Queen. There were 2 titles. One for the actual pageant and one where the students voted for their RAG Queen - People Choice. I studied my ass off and got an opportunity to work for a company that was fantastic to pay my dues, hone my skills and learn about the industry. Designer boy and I had fun but we weren't sure if we were right for each other. We denied this for a while until...

2003: I completed my 3rd year, plus I finished the 3 1st year subjects I had failed and graduated with flying colours. I was still working at this company and it was a tough year. Classes in the morning, rush to the show, rush back and do afternoon classes and complete assignments in the evening. I met my man at the company and it was love at first sight. People always said that to me and I used to tell them to read another Mills & Boon. Haha!! I got it, though, for the first time ever. I broke up with Designer boy and started dating my man!

2004: I turned 21 years old and had the most incredible birthday party!!
I was feeling frustrated at the company. I had reached the ceiling professionally and needed to grow even more. My man encouraged me and helped me. I sent off "CV's" to various companies and eventually got the call from the company I am at today. I started training and then started BAM! 4 days later.

2005: 2 days after my 22nd birthday I moved out of home. I moved into a quaint, tiny garden cottage. It was perfect. I felt like an independant woman and suddenly realised how tough it was out of the nest. It was an amazing lesson. I got an incredible "promotion" if you will and it was a huge break in my career. My profile was rising and it was overwhelming. I got sucked into the celebrity world and my head grew waay too big. I am truly glad and blessed that I have such amazing friends, family and my man that keep me grounded. Let me tell you, we are all human and it's easy to get wrapped up in a glossy glam world that falsely tells you it "adores and loves you". It's destroying when you start believing it's true and real.

2006: I moved into my man's new home in October. I had all these idea about how I was going to transform his bachelor pad into a pad for 2, until I realised how naive I was in a) trying to change things and b) expense.

2007: Special K and I decided to create our own opportunity in this industry. The entertainment industry has so many dimensions to it and I want to explore. We started our own company in order to start working on a special project, after being told that we'd never make it in a cut throat / mans world. They were wrong. We surprised not only them but ourselves.

2008: We've had a few set backs with the economic climate, but we're feeling positive that this project will be a huge success. We've put enough blood, sweat and buckets of tears into this! With that said, I actually laugh every single day. My man and I are strong - I love him to death and don't know what I would do without him. I have the most amazing friends and family and I feel blessed every day.

I have grown as a person, I have had been given plenty of lessons to learn. I laugh every day, I cry sometimes too but if I had to have a choice to go back I don’t think I would. Sure, I often say: if I had the knowledge I have now and had the chance to go back in time, I’d do it! Honestly though, I don’t think I would. Things happen for a reason to make you grow as a person and to mould the woman that I am becoming; if I had to go back and change things I might not be the same person I am today.