It's called deodorant. I'm just saying. Good God! There is nothing worse then the weather getting warmer and people's B.O. getting stronger.
For 3 hours today I kept sitting next to people who had the worst B.O. EVER.
I couldn't take it. Eventually I walked outside to get some fresh air. Literally.
It was me. Oh the fucking horror. What the hell? I still couldn't get it out of my nostrils and took deep breaths originally to clear the nasal passages and just smelt the waft of B.O constantly.
The shock and realisation of it being me was awful. B..bu..but, I put deo on this morning.
I did. I know I did. WTF??
How embarrassing! If I was sitting closely to people and thinking it was them the whole time, and it was me...they must have been dying. Oh the horror.
Of course. I changed handbags this morning and didn't transfer my deodorant either, so now I have to (mortifyingly) go and ask the very people I've been stinking out for the past 3 hours, if they have deo.
Cringe.
I now smell lovely and floral. Just for the record.
I'm still blushing though.
A mate of mine has organised us tickets for Joburg Day. It's a concert that 94.7 (a radio station) puts on every Spring. I'm quite excited!
I went last year and I loved it!!
Not sure what I'm doing tonight? Have 4 propositions. What can I say? Miss Popular is busy while the man's away! JUST KIDDING!!!!
Have a great weekend and can't wait for the weekend. Honestly.
Showing posts with label embarrassing. Show all posts
Showing posts with label embarrassing. Show all posts
Friday, September 5, 2008
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
As red as....
I am blushing. I am bright red. Crimson red, Ferrari red, Fire Engine red. As red as a lobster, a tomatoe and a pom who's spent 5 minutes in the sun.
You get the point.
Murphy's Law struck again. I, of course, have to learn things the hard way! Dear Lord! Let me start at the beginning.
I went onto the TV set this morning and was instantly ushered to the make-up and hair room. I do not know why make up artists insist on putting dark, brown shades of lipstick on me. I understand our make-up has to look darker for it to stand out, but brown lipstick? No!
The worst thing is if you mention this, ever so honestly and nicely, you end up sounding like a diva bitch, anyway. It's really not the case but please. Stop putting me in brown. I don't like it.
Anyways, I then had to make my way to the set where the sound guy attached the microphone to my top. That is always awkward. The small mic basically needs to sit just above your breasts, preferably in cleavage.
I put the cable underneath my top and the monitor on the back of my pants, but that was when the dude had to adjust it near the twins. It's um...bonding!
We did the first part of the shoot and it was awesome. I had so much fun. We took a break so that the camera's could change batteries and tape etc.
I obviously, go to the loo. I brush my hair, hum (out of tune) a little, cough, blow my nose - I sound like an elephant having sex with a foghorn, get my make-up I've just rubbed off re-applied and walk back onto set. 5 guys are killing themselves laughing.
I think nothing of it, and move off to do some skinnering with Special K.
Our conversation is as follows:
B:"How do you think it's going?"
K:"I think we're doing well, but I'm a little irritated with how my make-ups been done.
B: "Me tooo!! I don't get it...why do they put brown lipstick on me? Argh!"
K: "No babe, you look great...look at my cheeks..."
At this stage, I felt the blood drain out of my face and then race back into the reddest of red blushes.
I looked in horror at Special K, pointed at her chest and mouthed: "Our mics are on!"
Fuck!
There is just no getting out of that. We are bitching and we are busted.
We then make things worse (trying to make things better) by then saying (not obviously...nooo!!)
K: But, I mean... I guess, we're just, um, being mean! I could never do my make-up this nicely!"
I'm now dying at how this is just getting worse, but panicking because I need to say something so I say: "You look amazing! We should get lessons from this woman."
Oh. My. God! How false could that be? And the "False Award goes to....*drum roll* The Blonde Blogshell!"
Kill.me.now.
We walk in, sheepishly, not wanting to make eye contact with anyone. I suddenly realise that the camera's aren't filming and that not one of the sound guys, directors or anyone else has a pair of headphones on.
Does this mean we're in the clear? Did no one hear us?
Say it IS so!
I couldn't take it anymore, so I asked and held my breath waiting for the dreaded answer.
"We heard your bathroom antics, your bad humming and your coughing and spluttering!" He was clearly amused by this.
"So...you didn't hear anything else?"
"No, why? Were you gossiping?"
"No..." Paranoia sets in, "Why? Why would we be gossiping? Why would you ask that?"
"We've caught a lot of people out like that, but we were all doing things, so no one had the headphones on."
I let out a thankful sigh of relief that no one had heard our bitching, but they heard me pee and they heard my nose blowing that could scare small children.
I am still blushing and I've learnt the biggest lesson ever. Switch your mic off!!
PS> It's the Sex And The City movie premier tonight! I'm taking my little sister with me...Good Times!
You get the point.
Murphy's Law struck again. I, of course, have to learn things the hard way! Dear Lord! Let me start at the beginning.
I went onto the TV set this morning and was instantly ushered to the make-up and hair room. I do not know why make up artists insist on putting dark, brown shades of lipstick on me. I understand our make-up has to look darker for it to stand out, but brown lipstick? No!
The worst thing is if you mention this, ever so honestly and nicely, you end up sounding like a diva bitch, anyway. It's really not the case but please. Stop putting me in brown. I don't like it.
Anyways, I then had to make my way to the set where the sound guy attached the microphone to my top. That is always awkward. The small mic basically needs to sit just above your breasts, preferably in cleavage.
I put the cable underneath my top and the monitor on the back of my pants, but that was when the dude had to adjust it near the twins. It's um...bonding!
We did the first part of the shoot and it was awesome. I had so much fun. We took a break so that the camera's could change batteries and tape etc.
I obviously, go to the loo. I brush my hair, hum (out of tune) a little, cough, blow my nose - I sound like an elephant having sex with a foghorn, get my make-up I've just rubbed off re-applied and walk back onto set. 5 guys are killing themselves laughing.
I think nothing of it, and move off to do some skinnering with Special K.
Our conversation is as follows:
B:"How do you think it's going?"
K:"I think we're doing well, but I'm a little irritated with how my make-ups been done.
B: "Me tooo!! I don't get it...why do they put brown lipstick on me? Argh!"
K: "No babe, you look great...look at my cheeks..."
At this stage, I felt the blood drain out of my face and then race back into the reddest of red blushes.
I looked in horror at Special K, pointed at her chest and mouthed: "Our mics are on!"
Fuck!
There is just no getting out of that. We are bitching and we are busted.
We then make things worse (trying to make things better) by then saying (not obviously...nooo!!)
K: But, I mean... I guess, we're just, um, being mean! I could never do my make-up this nicely!"
I'm now dying at how this is just getting worse, but panicking because I need to say something so I say: "You look amazing! We should get lessons from this woman."
Oh. My. God! How false could that be? And the "False Award goes to....*drum roll* The Blonde Blogshell!"
Kill.me.now.
We walk in, sheepishly, not wanting to make eye contact with anyone. I suddenly realise that the camera's aren't filming and that not one of the sound guys, directors or anyone else has a pair of headphones on.
Does this mean we're in the clear? Did no one hear us?
Say it IS so!
I couldn't take it anymore, so I asked and held my breath waiting for the dreaded answer.
"We heard your bathroom antics, your bad humming and your coughing and spluttering!" He was clearly amused by this.
"So...you didn't hear anything else?"
"No, why? Were you gossiping?"
"No..." Paranoia sets in, "Why? Why would we be gossiping? Why would you ask that?"
"We've caught a lot of people out like that, but we were all doing things, so no one had the headphones on."
I let out a thankful sigh of relief that no one had heard our bitching, but they heard me pee and they heard my nose blowing that could scare small children.
I am still blushing and I've learnt the biggest lesson ever. Switch your mic off!!
PS> It's the Sex And The City movie premier tonight! I'm taking my little sister with me...Good Times!
Friday, February 8, 2008
My morning in the mall...
How is it that I manage to trip UP stairs? How is that I manage to trip over my own feet? I am so clumsy, it's embarrassing. I was walking in the mall today and all of a sudden my one foot stepping out caught my other heel and I stumbled and lost a shoe. This shoe went flying across the tiled floor and I had to have someone pick it up for me and walk 2 meters to give it to me. I wanted to sink into the floor. I immediately looked at the shoe as if to say: "Damn heels! The heels broken!" It wasn't, but I needed some excuse!
I am also a sucker for twins! Baby twins. If I see a double pram strolling along I immediately stop the mom crouch down and coo! If they're identical I'm even worse! I have no idea what it is about twins. Secretly (hmm...does this "secret" still count now that I've said this on my blog?) I hope I have twins one day, despite the hard bloody work it involves! Today I saw this mom with twin daughters. Beautiful little things with big blue eyes, curly blonde hair and dimples. Well I startled the mom by rushing over. I did my"Awww-ing and Ooooh-ing" when the girls instantly started crying. I got the dirtiest look from the mom, which was quite right, I guess. I just can't help myself. I'm an embarrassment to all my friends around me.
I sat down to have a quick coffee and to rest my sore feet. I am going to sound like an insensitive bitch. I'm not.The waiter came over and I didn't know which eye to look at. His one eye was staring out to the left. I was so uncomfortable because I kept shifting my eyes from the one to the other and all I could think of is: "Which eye do I look at? Oh shit. Now he knows I'm looking at his bad eye. Crap. Oh shit this is so uncomfortable and now I'm most likely making him uncomfortable by making him aware that I'm aware! Oh shit!"So I looked at his lips but he had a huge wet pimple on his top lip and then I felt even more uncomfortable because he was probably aware of his huge, yellow zit and now I had to make it even more obvious by looking/staring at his zit. Shit!
I then decided I need to buy myself some new clothes, maybe just a new skirt and pair of pants. What the hell has happened to the sizes? I'm not the tiniest of girls, I mean I'm no rival for Size 0 Victoria Beckham, but I'm not a "Fuller sized" woman either. I'm in the middle. I picked up my standard 12 and I had to triple check the tag because I was convinced I had picked up an 8. It was the tiniest thing I've ever seen. I then looked at the 14, it looked like a 10. The 16 looked all right, except when it came to trying it on the most awful change room, I could barely get the pants passed my hips. WTF is going???? Depressing.
I'm so looking forward to the weekend. I need to chill! Tonight I'm going to watch the 2 bands, Wonderboom and Holly and the Woods. Should be awesome! I'm getting hassled to have a birthday party tomorrow night, but I haven't planned anything. If I do, I'll be sure to let you know all about it on Monday!
Have a wicked weekend
x
I am also a sucker for twins! Baby twins. If I see a double pram strolling along I immediately stop the mom crouch down and coo! If they're identical I'm even worse! I have no idea what it is about twins. Secretly (hmm...does this "secret" still count now that I've said this on my blog?) I hope I have twins one day, despite the hard bloody work it involves! Today I saw this mom with twin daughters. Beautiful little things with big blue eyes, curly blonde hair and dimples. Well I startled the mom by rushing over. I did my"Awww-ing and Ooooh-ing" when the girls instantly started crying. I got the dirtiest look from the mom, which was quite right, I guess. I just can't help myself. I'm an embarrassment to all my friends around me.
I sat down to have a quick coffee and to rest my sore feet. I am going to sound like an insensitive bitch. I'm not.The waiter came over and I didn't know which eye to look at. His one eye was staring out to the left. I was so uncomfortable because I kept shifting my eyes from the one to the other and all I could think of is: "Which eye do I look at? Oh shit. Now he knows I'm looking at his bad eye. Crap. Oh shit this is so uncomfortable and now I'm most likely making him uncomfortable by making him aware that I'm aware! Oh shit!"So I looked at his lips but he had a huge wet pimple on his top lip and then I felt even more uncomfortable because he was probably aware of his huge, yellow zit and now I had to make it even more obvious by looking/staring at his zit. Shit!
I then decided I need to buy myself some new clothes, maybe just a new skirt and pair of pants. What the hell has happened to the sizes? I'm not the tiniest of girls, I mean I'm no rival for Size 0 Victoria Beckham, but I'm not a "Fuller sized" woman either. I'm in the middle. I picked up my standard 12 and I had to triple check the tag because I was convinced I had picked up an 8. It was the tiniest thing I've ever seen. I then looked at the 14, it looked like a 10. The 16 looked all right, except when it came to trying it on the most awful change room, I could barely get the pants passed my hips. WTF is going???? Depressing.
I'm so looking forward to the weekend. I need to chill! Tonight I'm going to watch the 2 bands, Wonderboom and Holly and the Woods. Should be awesome! I'm getting hassled to have a birthday party tomorrow night, but I haven't planned anything. If I do, I'll be sure to let you know all about it on Monday!
Have a wicked weekend
x
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