It's the weekend baby!!

Onwards and Upwards completely. Thank you for your loving, suportive words!

I am not going to be a little pity party and life does go on... So I'm being positive and kind of ignoring it. Perhaps it's weird for some people, but it's my coping mechanism right now. I'm not sweeping anything under the carpet, but I just don't want to curl into a mess of a ball.

Today I had my make-up done for a TV shoot. I find it super relaxing having make up done. I would go as far as saying that I sometimes prefer it to a massage. Sacriledge I'm sure. I'm kinda glad the face is done because tonight I plan to have a party. Shit, why not? I need to knock back a cosmo or two and just enjoy myself with my friends Sugar, Special K and EB. I'm really looking forward to it and even bought a dress for the occasion. A dress that's not black. Another first. It's this deep purple colour and it's sexy. Yes!!

I also went underwear shopping today. I decided that the boring cotton undies and t-shirt bras are just not going to cut it anymore. I'm over being boring and being single certainly has given me something to think about. Even if no one sees it, I want to know that sexy lace is going on underneath my jeans and t-shirt. I bought a wonderbra that is so WONDERful I can't believe I never had one before. Yes. I am apparently slow. If I say so myself with the wonderful work that is Wonderbra...these puppies are swell. Excuse the pun.
Anyway, so you know it's bad when the lady at the underwear store remembers me and says: "Eish! It's been looong neh?"
Um. Great. Thanks for the update and for remembering. That isn't uncomfortable at all. WTF?
She even threw in a pair of panties with a wink. I couldn't wait to get out of there.

Have a wicked weekend xx

Formal vs Casual

I am going to an event tonight at the Westcliff Hotel. The dress code says: Formal.

Dress codes make me nervous because no one ever seems to oblige or obey.

I am very aware that "formal" (in my dictionary) means evening dress and suits for the guys, however, I have been to formal events before in an evening gown and people have been in cocktail dresses or worse, black pants and a smart top. That for me, is semi casual or cocktail attire.I have also rocked up at a "formal" event (having learnt from the above mentioned) in a cocktail dress and people were in evening gowns and ball gowns. Ball gowns.
These days Formal means weird and wonderful things to different people. I have a long black dress with a little diamante detail... I just hope people dress up as well, otherwise I'll just have to target the champagne table in my gown.

What are the chances that I have two formal functions to go to? Apparently good, except I actually do know what to wear on Saturday...it's a Valentines Ball.

I went to JJ Schoeman (a hot SA designer) who is giving me a dress to wear (and return) for Saturday. I have a broad back so zips in that area are always a bit of a mission (as in I need to go up a size. Yay for me.) Designers design for size 0 Fashion Hangers aka Models ; not for the normal woman.Well, I found a dress, after chiffon and silk was thrown around and it is flattering. Alright, honestly I sucked everything in within a cm of my life and was too nervous to exhale, but I did after looking like a smurf and nothing ripped. Phew.

I'll report back tomorrow!

Ze French have a way with words....

So, seen any aliens? Today was D-Day. Will Smith didn't need to be on alert,after all!
Well... What a fucking day.

I was asked to be in a fashion show today for charity. I am not a model. I am not size zero and I am doing this for fun with other profiles. Some are top models and others that are TV personalities, radio presenters etc.
Right. So. The organiser of the show, who happens to be a friend of mine, asked for my dress size.
I told him and he looked at me like I was crazy.
"Honey! You are hardly that size! Look at all the weight you've lost!"
"Flattery babe, thank you, but I know my body. Even though I've lost weight, I've lost no weight in my boobs (thank God) and my back bones/ribs can't lose weight and I've always had a broad back. I know my size hun!"
I arrive at the rehearsal and dress fitting last night, to find that he has organised dresses (they're beautiful and expensive designer dresses) that are 3 sizes too small.
As a result, I had to organise with the boutiques and designers to get new dresses tomorrow morning (the day of the show...which is today. Keep up.) Not my job and a little annoying, but he's a friend and I don't mind. All that much.
Oh and this is awesome, I am standing with Miss South Africa and other celeby models who are trying on size 28 and 30 dresses.
"Oooh, it's too big. We'll have to pin it!"
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrggggggggghhhhhhhh!! I can bearly fit the dresses over my head or above my knees. Kill me now.

I race off to the first designer (time is of the essence) and eventually find something that fits.
I then race off to the show, do the final rehearsal and then race to the final store before the actual show starts.
Mission and a half. I walk in with the dress that doesn't fit. It's a size 32. I go straight to the manager who actually happens to be the owner of the store. She's French. A FRENCH BITCH!
"Hi there, I need to change this dress for the Fashion Show happening in 2 hours time!"
"Oh, is ze model obese?"
"Excuse me? It's actually for me. I'm not a model, I'm one of the personalities modelling in it."
"But you are 'uge!"
"WHAT??"
"Zis is ze beegest dress we 'ave!"
"Well, I am hardly obese...I'm a normal woman who has curves."
"Well zis is a beeg size for ze French. You will stretch ze clothes."
"Right. You're in SA and I don't need you being bitchy, I just need a solution since I'm wearing your clothes in an hour! If you'd rather I don't, trust me, I'd be thrilled. I don't need to wear your lousy clothes anyway."
She sulked off and threw outfits into the change room while making sarcastic, bitchy comments to her shop assistant about getting Really, really, really BEEG sizes and "non, non, that vil never fit her...get her a beeger one."

Fuck, I'm so pissed off. I couldn't believe the nerve. I was actually more irritate with myself that I hadn't stood up for myself and bitch slapped her. I wish I wasn't such a walk over, but it was literally one of those: Could've; should've; would've scenarios.

I finally found something and pushed my shoulders back, the boobs forward, sucked the tummy in and pasted a smile on my face and walked out there...no I "minced" out there for the world to see this Curvy REAL woman strutting her stuff down the catwalk.

I had fun, but dude.

Skinny Bitch - well, I'm getting there!

I am absolutely and utterly thrilled. No seriously. I cannot remember the last time this happened to me. In fact, I need to take a moment.

I bought a cute dress yesterday to put over leggings. I hate change rooms and so I didn't try it on. I just took the size I normally wear with the thought that if it doesn't fit, I'll just exchange it.

I put it on this morning, looked in the mirror and my face dropped...into a smile.

It was TOO BIG!!

Well fuck me. I have not experienced that in, well, years!

I did my happy jig and beamed down the stairs to the man who was drinking coffee and playing PS2 Guitar Hero.

"What do you think?"

"It's too big for you!"

"Exactly!! Oh my God! Do you realise what you have just said to me?"

"It's too big?"

"Yeeesss!!!" I break out into 'Hallelujah!' and dance around the room a little.

"Shit, I should have just said that every time you ask me "what do you think?"...it would have saved me a lot of agony over 5 years."

"Ha! You're funny! Let's take a moment. It's. too. biiiig!"

I have had a permanent grin on my face the entire day!

Now. I'd like to take a minute to address clothing shop owners who have changing rooms.

I am no expert, although I am the typical gal who loves clothes and accessories, so here is my question.

Why the hell are there bright, unflattering lights that show up every lump, bump and pore?

If I had to own a store with change rooms, I'd find "thin" mirrors, with soft attractive lighting and enough hooks to hang up all the clothes plus enough space to move around in.

I'm just saying.

Blondie Boutique. Nice ring to it. Oh and all my blogging friends would get free clothes.

Just as well I don't have a store. I'd be bankrupt before I open! Hahaha!

Oh and...I am seriously looking for a cotton dress that can be casually worn that looks like this - anyone know of a place??