Ok, so I feel very honoured that I have been tagged in 2 blogs, especially since I am so new to this site :-) Thank you Ruby and Natalie!
Ruby, you tagged me first and since my i-Pod isn't working I decided I'd use the radio (even though it took a few hours waiting for the songs and it was over an interrupted period too...I think that's shuffled enough, right? Here goes...according to 94.7 Highveld Stereo's playlist :-)
1. IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OK?" YOU SAY?
Mary J. Blige- Just Fine (ha ha)
2. WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?
Sean Kingston - Me Love
3. WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
Nickleback - Rockstar (YES!! ha ha ha)
4. HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
Britney Spears -Gimme More
5. WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
Leona Lewis - Bleeding Love (ha ha)
6. WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
Mutya Bwena (excuse the spelling) - Just a little bit
7. WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
Gwen Stefani - 4 in the morning (hee hee)
8. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR PARENTS
Timbaland -Apologise (yikes!)
9. WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN
Hoobastank -The reason (it's very strange -ha ha)
10. WHAT IS 2 + 2?
Katharine McPhee - Love Story
11. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND
Tasha Baxter - The Journey :-)
12. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE
Mario - How do I breathe (shit this is freaky)
13. WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
Simple Plan - When I'm gone (um......creepy)
14. WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
Kylie Minogue - 2 hearts
15. WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Louise Carver - The Only thing (oh my word!!)
16. WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
Driverlane -Radio (haha)
17. WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING
Robbie Williams - LoveLight
18. WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL
Karen Zoid - Aeroplane Jane (no, come on...that's weird)
19. WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
Shaine Ward - No, you hang up (hahaha)
20. WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
Fuzigish - I'm not supposed to be here
21. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
Nicole (pussy cat doll) - Baby Love
22. WHAT SHOULD YOU POST THIS AS
Nelly Furtado - In God's Hands
Now that was seriously freaky!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
I am a sucker for punishment
I really am. I get abused rudely by this horrible woman (hairdresser), I even BLOG about it and then what do I do? I take her up on her horribly rude offer and get my hair done.
Yes, I know!!! I am an idiot who obviously really likes punishment and people being rude to her.
It really bothered me though. I know this seems incredibly stupid but really, this woman who means JACK SHIT in my life actually bothered me enough to get my hair done the "right" way.
So I walked in and she says: "Oh excellent! I'm soooo glad you decided to come through so we can fix that!" pointing at my blonde locks.
I smile thinly.
She starts explaining what she has in mind, you know, like highlighting my natural colour to make my natural blonde "POP", and then she mentions something about putting dark streaks in.
Hold. The. Bus.
"Um, excuse me... I do not want any brown streaks. I like my blonde colour and I'd like to keep it as natural as possible, seeing as I am a dying breed of au natural blondes. All I want is a few highlights."
Her little beady eyes narrow (I didn't think it was possible) and she says: "Dahling. I know hair and I knoooow what suits a face, ok?"
"Ok."I say, annoyed at how wimp-like I'm being.
The colours start being added to my hair and within 30 minutes I look like some alien with all the foil on my head.
She finishes her final foil highlight and then stands back to look at me.
"Wow. You're wearing make-up today. Gosh, it's amazing what make-up can do for someone."
Well that was IT! I was fucking furious!!!
Who the fuck is this woman? I don't know her and she doesn't know me.
It also happens to be a day where I am cramping like a bitch with PMS. Excellent.
I just, calmly and sweetly, said to her, "Not everyone needs make-up and I'm one of the lucky ones."
Ok, I know! It wasn't exactly cutting edge or as witty as I would have liked but for starters, I was shocked and it was the best I could do under the shock.
Well admittedly, my hair colour came out beautifully (even with the light brown streaks) and then it was time to cut and blow.
I asked for a trim and to blow wave straight. Well I got a few cm's off and my hair is curly - it's been curled so much I look like a poppie! I said to her: "Um, I'm not sure about the curls..."
"Yes daaahling, but they'll drop! Trussst me! I am an expert with hair."
"Yes, um, quite. Thing is, you may be an expert on hair; but I'm an expert on my hair! My hair is wavy and curls don't "drop" they stay put without hairspray."
But let me tell you...the instant turn around of this bitches attitude was incredible.
Suddenly the compliments were pouring in and it was like I had transformed into her new BFF!
"You see? I told you it would suit you!"
"Yes, thank you very much! I do appreciate it and since you suggested I come to you, I really appreciate the complimentary do!" I smiled ever so sweetly at her.
"Oh..um...yes...well....um..."
AT LAST! This cow was on the back foot!
I know that was a really scaly and bitchy thing to do and ordinarily I would never dream of doing something like that, but I had just HAD it with her!
At least I got my hair done for free...I'd like to think of it as compensation for her rudeness.
PS>Ruby babe, I still haven't done the meme yet but I haven't listened to the radio yet! Will do it soon!
Yes, I know!!! I am an idiot who obviously really likes punishment and people being rude to her.
It really bothered me though. I know this seems incredibly stupid but really, this woman who means JACK SHIT in my life actually bothered me enough to get my hair done the "right" way.
So I walked in and she says: "Oh excellent! I'm soooo glad you decided to come through so we can fix that!" pointing at my blonde locks.
I smile thinly.
She starts explaining what she has in mind, you know, like highlighting my natural colour to make my natural blonde "POP", and then she mentions something about putting dark streaks in.
Hold. The. Bus.
"Um, excuse me... I do not want any brown streaks. I like my blonde colour and I'd like to keep it as natural as possible, seeing as I am a dying breed of au natural blondes. All I want is a few highlights."
Her little beady eyes narrow (I didn't think it was possible) and she says: "Dahling. I know hair and I knoooow what suits a face, ok?"
"Ok."I say, annoyed at how wimp-like I'm being.
The colours start being added to my hair and within 30 minutes I look like some alien with all the foil on my head.
She finishes her final foil highlight and then stands back to look at me.
"Wow. You're wearing make-up today. Gosh, it's amazing what make-up can do for someone."
Well that was IT! I was fucking furious!!!
Who the fuck is this woman? I don't know her and she doesn't know me.
It also happens to be a day where I am cramping like a bitch with PMS. Excellent.
I just, calmly and sweetly, said to her, "Not everyone needs make-up and I'm one of the lucky ones."
Ok, I know! It wasn't exactly cutting edge or as witty as I would have liked but for starters, I was shocked and it was the best I could do under the shock.
Well admittedly, my hair colour came out beautifully (even with the light brown streaks) and then it was time to cut and blow.
I asked for a trim and to blow wave straight. Well I got a few cm's off and my hair is curly - it's been curled so much I look like a poppie! I said to her: "Um, I'm not sure about the curls..."
"Yes daaahling, but they'll drop! Trussst me! I am an expert with hair."
"Yes, um, quite. Thing is, you may be an expert on hair; but I'm an expert on my hair! My hair is wavy and curls don't "drop" they stay put without hairspray."
But let me tell you...the instant turn around of this bitches attitude was incredible.
Suddenly the compliments were pouring in and it was like I had transformed into her new BFF!
"You see? I told you it would suit you!"
"Yes, thank you very much! I do appreciate it and since you suggested I come to you, I really appreciate the complimentary do!" I smiled ever so sweetly at her.
"Oh..um...yes...well....um..."
AT LAST! This cow was on the back foot!
I know that was a really scaly and bitchy thing to do and ordinarily I would never dream of doing something like that, but I had just HAD it with her!
At least I got my hair done for free...I'd like to think of it as compensation for her rudeness.
PS>Ruby babe, I still haven't done the meme yet but I haven't listened to the radio yet! Will do it soon!
Monday, December 10, 2007
I need a weekend
FROM the weekend!!
Let me just start by saying that Saturday's Christmas/Year End "Lunch" was fantastic! Really just excellent!
I out did myself too. My friends call me "Florence" because I have a tendency to nurse my drinks. I enjoy alcohol, I just don't do too well at drinking it quickly. I prefer to sip on them and as a result I normally have one drink to everyone elses 4th.
'nuff said.
I started drinking at midday and ended at midnight! What a jol!! Shooters were flying and I did very well by not even feeling a little drunk. Total lie, ok, but I wasn't cotching my lungs out and passed out in a compromising position like some people I know! Or so I thought... I woke up on Sunday morning feeling like a truck had used my head as a speed bump...slowly driving forwards and backwards. I had a missed call on my phone and listened to the voice mail.
"Blondie!!! Wow! You're just one big party gal aren't you? Holy shit girl. You had us all in stitches! Thanks for the jol!"
Um....
How was I funny? What did I do? I couldn't think of anything that particularly stood out but then again the only thing racing through my brain was a small painful thud-thud; thud-thud; thud-thud. I popped 2 old faithfuls (Grandpa tablets) and went in search of a greasy breakfast.
What did I do? What did I do? What did I do? I kept muttering to myself over and over.
I thought I was rather well behaved.
I numbly sat watchin TV and slowly but surely (after a few hours) little patches started emerging.
Oh. Dear. God!
I think I sat blushing on the couch for a good half an hour.
I think I pretended to be a rockstar groupie asking everyone...no, screaming out to everyone to sign my boob! I know I didn't yank it out but still! Shit shit shit shit shit.
Please don't let me have asked my boss. Pleeeeaassse!!!!!
Ah yes but I'm obviously being punished. I walk into the office today and the first person I run into would be Mr. Boss.
"Great party hey Blondie?"
I instantly go red. I really must see what I can do about removing that gland (or whatever.)
"Yes, it was awesome! Thank you!" I say, a little too eagerly.
"Have a good day...rockstar!"
FUCK!
I like to think of myself as a lady and not just any lady, a classy one. What is happening to me? Have I been bitten by the Silly Season Bug? BEST it be over and SOON.
PS> Ruby I'll do the meme but um... I don't have an i-pod that works (it's on my To-Do-List to fix) do CD's count? Or the radio? Hmmm... the radio could be fun, although it would take half a day to wait for each song for each Q.
PPS> Read Ruby's blog, you'll understand if you don't.
PPPS> You owe me Ruby for free advertising! LOL ;-)
Let me just start by saying that Saturday's Christmas/Year End "Lunch" was fantastic! Really just excellent!
I out did myself too. My friends call me "Florence" because I have a tendency to nurse my drinks. I enjoy alcohol, I just don't do too well at drinking it quickly. I prefer to sip on them and as a result I normally have one drink to everyone elses 4th.
'nuff said.
I started drinking at midday and ended at midnight! What a jol!! Shooters were flying and I did very well by not even feeling a little drunk. Total lie, ok, but I wasn't cotching my lungs out and passed out in a compromising position like some people I know! Or so I thought... I woke up on Sunday morning feeling like a truck had used my head as a speed bump...slowly driving forwards and backwards. I had a missed call on my phone and listened to the voice mail.
"Blondie!!! Wow! You're just one big party gal aren't you? Holy shit girl. You had us all in stitches! Thanks for the jol!"
Um....
How was I funny? What did I do? I couldn't think of anything that particularly stood out but then again the only thing racing through my brain was a small painful thud-thud; thud-thud; thud-thud. I popped 2 old faithfuls (Grandpa tablets) and went in search of a greasy breakfast.
What did I do? What did I do? What did I do? I kept muttering to myself over and over.
I thought I was rather well behaved.
I numbly sat watchin TV and slowly but surely (after a few hours) little patches started emerging.
Oh. Dear. God!
I think I sat blushing on the couch for a good half an hour.
I think I pretended to be a rockstar groupie asking everyone...no, screaming out to everyone to sign my boob! I know I didn't yank it out but still! Shit shit shit shit shit.
Please don't let me have asked my boss. Pleeeeaassse!!!!!
Ah yes but I'm obviously being punished. I walk into the office today and the first person I run into would be Mr. Boss.
"Great party hey Blondie?"
I instantly go red. I really must see what I can do about removing that gland (or whatever.)
"Yes, it was awesome! Thank you!" I say, a little too eagerly.
"Have a good day...rockstar!"
FUCK!
I like to think of myself as a lady and not just any lady, a classy one. What is happening to me? Have I been bitten by the Silly Season Bug? BEST it be over and SOON.
PS> Ruby I'll do the meme but um... I don't have an i-pod that works (it's on my To-Do-List to fix) do CD's count? Or the radio? Hmmm... the radio could be fun, although it would take half a day to wait for each song for each Q.
PPS> Read Ruby's blog, you'll understand if you don't.
PPPS> You owe me Ruby for free advertising! LOL ;-)
Friday, December 7, 2007
P-A-R-T-Y!
Oh! I forgot to mention that it's my Office Christmas Party tomorrow. We normally do it on the premises but tomorrow afternoon we are going somewhere else FOR "LUNCH"...it will probably be a LIQUID LUNCH for most. It's quite a fancy place but the restaurant is out in the open...around other shops and restaurants. Does that make any sense?
Firstly: What.were.they.thinking?
We are LOUD, a large crowd and we get OUT OF COnTrOL!!!
Secondly: We are LOUD, a large crowd and we get OUT OF COnTrOL!!!
I don't think we will ever be allowed back, some of us will probably be banned from the centre, which will prove to be a problem when we need to go back to retrieve our names we threw away.
Prohep is already on standby. H-E-L-P M-E!!
Firstly: What.were.they.thinking?
We are LOUD, a large crowd and we get OUT OF COnTrOL!!!
Secondly: We are LOUD, a large crowd and we get OUT OF COnTrOL!!!
I don't think we will ever be allowed back, some of us will probably be banned from the centre, which will prove to be a problem when we need to go back to retrieve our names we threw away.
Prohep is already on standby. H-E-L-P M-E!!
Bad Hair Day
I woke up this morning to my alarm clock/cellphone that sings out "La Bamba" LOUDLY. Mr.G rolled over, groaning: "Whyyyy does your alarm clock have to be so loud? Shit Blondie. I can never get back to sleep."
Blondie: "Well, guess it's successful then, hey?"
Mr. G: "Sssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhh!!!!"
I slunk out of bed, into the shower that nearly took my first layer of skin off, it was that hot. I obviously turned the tap a bit too far to the left. I let out the biggest scream that I'm sure the neighbours woke up after that.
Mr. G was in bed, cigarette in mouth glaring at me when I, the pink lobster, came out.
Mr.G: " I'm awake now."
It's best not to say anything.
I was off to a Charity, Gals only Breakfast. You could win a make-over worth R200 000. That would have been fabulous and needed, but I was there to support my mates - one was in the fashion show and one actually organised the breakfast.
Well, I don't know if it was just one of those days, if it was the weather or people just need a holiday but wow the bitchiness-with-a-smile was flowing today.
You know that bitchiness; they say bitchy things to you, smiling, so you can't actually react to it.
Now I know that the people at the breakfast are "professionals" but wow, give a girl a break. It's raining, I am not blessed with dead straight hair and it's EARLY, for F sakes.
I get this woman from a hair salon who says to everyone: 90% of the women in this room have the wrong hair style and wrong colour.
Well, that wasn't taken very well. The sales pitch failed just because us sensitive souls didn't like our manes being insulted.
Now, I happen to like my blonde hair. I get compliments on my hair, OK?
After the breakfast, the same woman comes to me, looks me up and down and then puts the smile on.
"Daaaahling, are you happy with your hair?"
I'm sipping coffee and I nearly spluttered it out onto her. Should have.
"Um, excuse me?"
"Your hair. Are you happy with it?" she looks at my head, scrutinizing it.
"Yes, why?" I immediately touch it, like it may have fallen out or turned green.
"Hmmm." she says disapprovingly. "Here's my card. You should come and see me."
She smiles and walks off.
I'm a sensitive soul and I LIKE my hair very much. COW!
I was not impressed.
Then, my incredible friend Bunny (the one in the show) and I went bra shopping. I finally found something that fits, gives the...uh... necessary support and my noombies don't look like Madonna cones. I'm browsing for matching panties when one of the store assistants comes up to me and says:
"Are you ok?" smiling again.
"Yes, thank you!" I say, assuming she's asking if I need help in the bra department...(ok, no pun intended.)
"It's cool in here hey?"
"Um, no I think it's a bit humid."
NO HESITATION.
"Oh. Are you one of those who sweats alot?" Looking at my forehead and hair (again)
"Excuse me?"
She smiles and walks away.
I picked up anything close enough to get into the change rooms so that I could see what she's talking about and my hair was a little damp around my face.
For fuck sakes. It's RAINING outside. It's not SWEAT, I JUST DON'T HAVE AN UMBRELLA, ELLA, ELLA EH EH EH!! OK??????????
It didn't end there.
As walked out the change room, that suddenly had a queue, I popped the thing I had taken to "try on" and put it on the "not-taking-it" hanger.
I heard a snigger. Turning around I looked to see what was happening. The ladies were all looking at me and then the hanger.
A pair of red crotchless panties were swinging from side to side.
Mortifying!
Blondie: "Well, guess it's successful then, hey?"
Mr. G: "Sssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhh!!!!"
I slunk out of bed, into the shower that nearly took my first layer of skin off, it was that hot. I obviously turned the tap a bit too far to the left. I let out the biggest scream that I'm sure the neighbours woke up after that.
Mr. G was in bed, cigarette in mouth glaring at me when I, the pink lobster, came out.
Mr.G: " I'm awake now."
It's best not to say anything.
I was off to a Charity, Gals only Breakfast. You could win a make-over worth R200 000. That would have been fabulous and needed, but I was there to support my mates - one was in the fashion show and one actually organised the breakfast.
Well, I don't know if it was just one of those days, if it was the weather or people just need a holiday but wow the bitchiness-with-a-smile was flowing today.
You know that bitchiness; they say bitchy things to you, smiling, so you can't actually react to it.
Now I know that the people at the breakfast are "professionals" but wow, give a girl a break. It's raining, I am not blessed with dead straight hair and it's EARLY, for F sakes.
I get this woman from a hair salon who says to everyone: 90% of the women in this room have the wrong hair style and wrong colour.
Well, that wasn't taken very well. The sales pitch failed just because us sensitive souls didn't like our manes being insulted.
Now, I happen to like my blonde hair. I get compliments on my hair, OK?
After the breakfast, the same woman comes to me, looks me up and down and then puts the smile on.
"Daaaahling, are you happy with your hair?"
I'm sipping coffee and I nearly spluttered it out onto her. Should have.
"Um, excuse me?"
"Your hair. Are you happy with it?" she looks at my head, scrutinizing it.
"Yes, why?" I immediately touch it, like it may have fallen out or turned green.
"Hmmm." she says disapprovingly. "Here's my card. You should come and see me."
She smiles and walks off.
I'm a sensitive soul and I LIKE my hair very much. COW!
I was not impressed.
Then, my incredible friend Bunny (the one in the show) and I went bra shopping. I finally found something that fits, gives the...uh... necessary support and my noombies don't look like Madonna cones. I'm browsing for matching panties when one of the store assistants comes up to me and says:
"Are you ok?" smiling again.
"Yes, thank you!" I say, assuming she's asking if I need help in the bra department...(ok, no pun intended.)
"It's cool in here hey?"
"Um, no I think it's a bit humid."
NO HESITATION.
"Oh. Are you one of those who sweats alot?" Looking at my forehead and hair (again)
"Excuse me?"
She smiles and walks away.
I picked up anything close enough to get into the change rooms so that I could see what she's talking about and my hair was a little damp around my face.
For fuck sakes. It's RAINING outside. It's not SWEAT, I JUST DON'T HAVE AN UMBRELLA, ELLA, ELLA EH EH EH!! OK??????????
It didn't end there.
As walked out the change room, that suddenly had a queue, I popped the thing I had taken to "try on" and put it on the "not-taking-it" hanger.
I heard a snigger. Turning around I looked to see what was happening. The ladies were all looking at me and then the hanger.
A pair of red crotchless panties were swinging from side to side.
Mortifying!
Thursday, December 6, 2007
My 3 hours...
consisted of Toys. Lots of them! Goodness. I felt like a little kiddie winkle again. My company is doing something very sweet and giving. They have chosen an orphanage and taken pictures of all the little children, written their ages and what they want from Santa and we had to choose one orphan and buy the pressies they asked for.
So, I chose a little 7 year old boy called Musa who wants: A soccer ball, clothes and sweeties.
It's very sweet. I entered Toy Zone today to get a soccer ball. Yes, well. I was enthralled. My God! Why didn't they have toys like that when I was an ankle biter? There are no wee ones in our family, so I'm not really around toys so this was education for me today.
I know I was supposed to be in the boys section, but all the pink in the corner of the store was some sort of magnet attracting me to it. Bratz. How fabulous? I think I need to get me one of those, just for my dressing table. They are just too cute.
Ahem...what has happened to Barbie? Her face is different. Completely different. She looks bitchy, almost. And since when, does Ken have brown hair? All my Ken's had blonde hair.
Apparently in 1993, Barbie dolls got given a belly button.* Interesting/Useless fact.*
There's even one Barbie that talks. Seriously, her mouth and cheeks move and she says stupid things like: "Hey Girl" and "Let's Party!"
Then I moved onto the Tickle Me Elmo. Well I sat poking his stomach through the hole in the plastic that says: TRY ME. It amused me for about 20 minutes.
I left eventually after my "Wows and Oooohs and Oh coool's" when moms gave me weird looks. "No lady, I'm not after your child, I just happen to be a big one myself!"
I wanted to say that to one woman who eyed me out with her beady little, heavily mascara'd eyes; but I didn't.
I suddenly realised that if I ever have children, I'm going to be the one struggling to teach them that "Sharing is Caring."
I can picture it now:
Future kid: Mommy, I wanna play with it!
Me, as Future Mom: Just wait a minute, I'm playing first!
Oh dear Lord.
I put my Christmas tree up this morning. It's up, the little fairy lights are blinking at me but it looks odd. Is it really the 6th of December? I mean, really. 19 days til Christmas - shit.
It doesn't feel like Christmas time and no corny, horribly scratched Boney-M Christmas Carol CD playing in the shops, is going to change that.
Every year I want to make that Christmas special. Each year I fail. I always imagine my home to have that cosy, Christmassy feel to it, with pretty decor; smell of red wine and mince pies wafting through; candles alit; parties with all my mates and yet that little dream bubble is always popped. The mates are away, mince pies don't smell unless they're off and that's not pretty, the place can't be cosy when it's the middle of Summer (although, that's also debatable with this shitty weather) and I can't make the home feel Christmassy when I'm not in the mood. I'm also not one of those who gets the Shopping done 3 months in advance. I say every year that: This year I'm going to be prepared. Every year I'm the mad blonde woman running around frantically with that "don't mess with me or get in my way. You'll be sorry" look in her eye.
Sheesh, aren't I just a barrel of smiles?
PS> Thanks Ruby for your help with my Blondies Best Blogs list. I didn't realise how many blogs I read until I did the list. I really need to do more work :-)
PPS> Thanks for reading.
So, I chose a little 7 year old boy called Musa who wants: A soccer ball, clothes and sweeties.
It's very sweet. I entered Toy Zone today to get a soccer ball. Yes, well. I was enthralled. My God! Why didn't they have toys like that when I was an ankle biter? There are no wee ones in our family, so I'm not really around toys so this was education for me today.
I know I was supposed to be in the boys section, but all the pink in the corner of the store was some sort of magnet attracting me to it. Bratz. How fabulous? I think I need to get me one of those, just for my dressing table. They are just too cute.
Ahem...what has happened to Barbie? Her face is different. Completely different. She looks bitchy, almost. And since when, does Ken have brown hair? All my Ken's had blonde hair.
Apparently in 1993, Barbie dolls got given a belly button.* Interesting/Useless fact.*
There's even one Barbie that talks. Seriously, her mouth and cheeks move and she says stupid things like: "Hey Girl" and "Let's Party!"
Then I moved onto the Tickle Me Elmo. Well I sat poking his stomach through the hole in the plastic that says: TRY ME. It amused me for about 20 minutes.
I left eventually after my "Wows and Oooohs and Oh coool's" when moms gave me weird looks. "No lady, I'm not after your child, I just happen to be a big one myself!"
I wanted to say that to one woman who eyed me out with her beady little, heavily mascara'd eyes; but I didn't.
I suddenly realised that if I ever have children, I'm going to be the one struggling to teach them that "Sharing is Caring."
I can picture it now:
Future kid: Mommy, I wanna play with it!
Me, as Future Mom: Just wait a minute, I'm playing first!
Oh dear Lord.
I put my Christmas tree up this morning. It's up, the little fairy lights are blinking at me but it looks odd. Is it really the 6th of December? I mean, really. 19 days til Christmas - shit.
It doesn't feel like Christmas time and no corny, horribly scratched Boney-M Christmas Carol CD playing in the shops, is going to change that.
Every year I want to make that Christmas special. Each year I fail. I always imagine my home to have that cosy, Christmassy feel to it, with pretty decor; smell of red wine and mince pies wafting through; candles alit; parties with all my mates and yet that little dream bubble is always popped. The mates are away, mince pies don't smell unless they're off and that's not pretty, the place can't be cosy when it's the middle of Summer (although, that's also debatable with this shitty weather) and I can't make the home feel Christmassy when I'm not in the mood. I'm also not one of those who gets the Shopping done 3 months in advance. I say every year that: This year I'm going to be prepared. Every year I'm the mad blonde woman running around frantically with that "don't mess with me or get in my way. You'll be sorry" look in her eye.
Sheesh, aren't I just a barrel of smiles?
PS> Thanks Ruby for your help with my Blondies Best Blogs list. I didn't realise how many blogs I read until I did the list. I really need to do more work :-)
PPS> Thanks for reading.
Wednesday, December 5, 2007
Themeless
I totally ROCK! Seriously. No room for modesty here. I rule! I totally rule the Poker table.
I played against 9 MEN, some of them are seasoned players. Me? Last night, was my second time and it was fabulous! Ok, I came 4th, but STILL, I ruled but knocking 6 men off the table!
*Blondie takes a bow*
"Luck be a lady tonight..."
Fuck me, but was that a storm last night, or was that a storm? Shit, these storms are getting worse!
It's like the end of the world, everytime! The wind is angry, the rain comes down like grey sheets so you can see jack shit and the sky looks purplish grey and threatening to end the world.
I had to drive home in that last night in my poor little 1.2 car that leaks through the windscreen and basically gets swept off the road in a slight breeze. It was fun. F-U-N!
So I'm fairly new to this blogging site and I have had such an incredible time reading all your blogs!
If your funny, slightly brilliant writing continues, I'm going to need a packet of Depends before my time!
Excellent, just excellent!
Ok and now, since this blog has had absolutely no theme, I thought I'd throw in a Question.
You see, I want to add some of your blogs to my reading list...i.e on the side of my blog, like most of you have. I've been to Settings and I've put Add link and yet it will not pop up by my page...why? What am I doing wrong?
All you wise, vetinary bloggers, help a BLONDE out please!!
Ciao for now
x
I played against 9 MEN, some of them are seasoned players. Me? Last night, was my second time and it was fabulous! Ok, I came 4th, but STILL, I ruled but knocking 6 men off the table!
*Blondie takes a bow*
"Luck be a lady tonight..."
Fuck me, but was that a storm last night, or was that a storm? Shit, these storms are getting worse!
It's like the end of the world, everytime! The wind is angry, the rain comes down like grey sheets so you can see jack shit and the sky looks purplish grey and threatening to end the world.
I had to drive home in that last night in my poor little 1.2 car that leaks through the windscreen and basically gets swept off the road in a slight breeze. It was fun. F-U-N!
So I'm fairly new to this blogging site and I have had such an incredible time reading all your blogs!
If your funny, slightly brilliant writing continues, I'm going to need a packet of Depends before my time!
Excellent, just excellent!
Ok and now, since this blog has had absolutely no theme, I thought I'd throw in a Question.
You see, I want to add some of your blogs to my reading list...i.e on the side of my blog, like most of you have. I've been to Settings and I've put Add link and yet it will not pop up by my page...why? What am I doing wrong?
All you wise, vetinary bloggers, help a BLONDE out please!!
Ciao for now
x
Tuesday, December 4, 2007
McDonalds Cheesy Pick up Line
This was certainly a first for me.
I went to the McDonalds today and arrived at the wrong time. The drive-thru queue was close to a km long, so I decided to park and go inside quickly. I was going to just eat the burger in my car, but decided I'd sit down there.
So there I am, stuffing the McChicken in my mouth, mayo dripping from the corners of my mouth and acting as if I hadn't seen food in days (I didn't realise how hungry I was) when this man came to my table and promptly sat down.My irritation flared up.
He only had one of the "tall, dark and handsome" traits. He was dark. He also had an accent that could have been Italian or Portuguese, maybe even Greek.
I instantly nick named him Pest-o.
Pest-o: "Hello there. If I could ask, you are not from South Africa, yes?"
Me: "I am, yes."
Pest-o: "Ah, but from where?"
Me: "Joburg."
Pest-o: "Interesting. You are not like other girls. You are, far more beautiful."
Me (wiping away mayo from mouth): "Thank you."
Pest-o: "Could I have your number, so that maybe we can talk."
Me: "No, I'm sorry. I'm engaged."
Pest-o: "But you have no ring."
CRAP.
Me: "It's um... ah... being sized."
Pest-o gave one of those smiles. I promise I'm not making this up. A gold tooth glared back at me and if it could have that little "triiing" shiny sound (like in the cheesy movies), there would have been a flash and a triiing.
Cringe factor.
He slinked away and I lost my appetite. Good thing I suppose, because McDonalds is not on my diet (unfortunately.)
I entertained the thought for a while. Guys always think that they should receive Noddy Badges for growing a pair and coming up to talk to girls , but there is a time and a place. Seriously.
Let's just say I gave him my number, he called, we decided to meet, the first date turned into a second or 5th, we have a long relationship and we get married. What would we tell people/our children/grandchildren?"Oh, you know, we met at McDonalds. It was really romantic. He sat down and asked me if I was from SA, while my mouth was crammed with McChicken."CLASSY! Um, I think not.
I went back to High school -yes, really.
No. Not to learn, but as the guest of honour/past pupil blah blah. *I heard that smirk!*
I was actually quite surprised that I was called out of all the pupils to call. My first thought : What do they want?
Gosh I'm cynical!
It was prize giving and I had to hand over the certificates and trophies. It was such a bitter sweet thing though. So many bitter sweet memories! The building has changed but the tuckshop was still the same (too many memories there) and so were the "playgrounds" and teachers. Most of them seem to have stayed in a time capsule.... called Botox. Ok, I don't know if they have but damn, I felt like I was watching the Bold and the Beautiful where Brooke still looks the same even though the soapie is 20 years in.
*Crap - did I just admit to being a B&B watcher? - I don't watch all the time, OK? OK?*
Anyway, back to the point. I was surprised at a lot of things, like:
1.) The teachers were all so nice and told me to call them by their names. Now, that was just strange and I just can't get my head around that. It was a case of: "Mrs. Gray, I mean, um... um... Heather." Nah, just sounds wrong. So no one got called anything.
2.) Seeing how young and little the girls were, I mean did I look that young and innocent back at school?
3.) Walking in and having the pupils say: "Good morning M'aam"
Say what?? Ok, wow, I feel like I just aged another 7 years!
4.) Having my hair down in assembly. It just felt wrong even after all these years.
So yes, it was an interesting morning. I felt very old and grown up. It's an odd feeling.
I was actually quite surprised that I was called out of all the pupils to call. My first thought : What do they want?
Gosh I'm cynical!
It was prize giving and I had to hand over the certificates and trophies. It was such a bitter sweet thing though. So many bitter sweet memories! The building has changed but the tuckshop was still the same (too many memories there) and so were the "playgrounds" and teachers. Most of them seem to have stayed in a time capsule.... called Botox. Ok, I don't know if they have but damn, I felt like I was watching the Bold and the Beautiful where Brooke still looks the same even though the soapie is 20 years in.
*Crap - did I just admit to being a B&B watcher? - I don't watch all the time, OK? OK?*
Anyway, back to the point. I was surprised at a lot of things, like:
1.) The teachers were all so nice and told me to call them by their names. Now, that was just strange and I just can't get my head around that. It was a case of: "Mrs. Gray, I mean, um... um... Heather." Nah, just sounds wrong. So no one got called anything.
2.) Seeing how young and little the girls were, I mean did I look that young and innocent back at school?
3.) Walking in and having the pupils say: "Good morning M'aam"
Say what?? Ok, wow, I feel like I just aged another 7 years!
4.) Having my hair down in assembly. It just felt wrong even after all these years.
So yes, it was an interesting morning. I felt very old and grown up. It's an odd feeling.
Monday, December 3, 2007
Bits and Blogs...
Well I have no idea how this really works... I mean, I read so many peoples blogs and they all seem to comment, they seem to read each others...so how on earth does this work? I feel like I'm in the outcast circle of Bloggers. How do you get into the "inner circle"?
Ha ha! Good grief, am I having flashbacks to school? Dear Lord let's hope not!
46664 - what a bloody marvelous concert! Shit it was good. The SA bands were incredible, they really held their own and quite frankly you just can't really tell who was international anymore! Well bloody done!
To see Madiba in the flesh, well, what can I say? I had goose bumps on top of goose bumps! I will never forget that!!
This weekend really was excellent, except for the fact that I need a weekend from the weekend!! My weekend actually started on Phuza Thursday aka Girls Night! 1 word described that: Debaucherous!
I have learnt that: 5 girls + countless shooters = high-pitched giggles, dancing on tables and an unbelievable craving for Fontana's at 03h30 (bless them for being open 24 hours!)
I'm feeling a little fragile today and I have a funny feeling it's going to be a loooong week!
Ok, well, any help would be great thank you...how does this whole thingy mabob work?
No holiday for me until the 30th of December. Shit.
Ha ha! Good grief, am I having flashbacks to school? Dear Lord let's hope not!
46664 - what a bloody marvelous concert! Shit it was good. The SA bands were incredible, they really held their own and quite frankly you just can't really tell who was international anymore! Well bloody done!
To see Madiba in the flesh, well, what can I say? I had goose bumps on top of goose bumps! I will never forget that!!
This weekend really was excellent, except for the fact that I need a weekend from the weekend!! My weekend actually started on Phuza Thursday aka Girls Night! 1 word described that: Debaucherous!
I have learnt that: 5 girls + countless shooters = high-pitched giggles, dancing on tables and an unbelievable craving for Fontana's at 03h30 (bless them for being open 24 hours!)
I'm feeling a little fragile today and I have a funny feeling it's going to be a loooong week!
Ok, well, any help would be great thank you...how does this whole thingy mabob work?
No holiday for me until the 30th of December. Shit.
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