Fairytales and Muffins (hopefully no more muffin tops in my jeans.)

Special K dragged me kicking and screaming, caveman style to the gym today. Have I mentioned I hate gym. No seriously. I hate the smell, I hate the sound of the circuit beep, I hate the clinking of the machines and weights. BUT, I hate the wobbly bits on my stomach that could rival a bakery with the amount of rolls I have accumulated! I hate the cellulite that could rival an orange peel and the dress sizes that seem to increasing. Argh.

Nevertheless, Blogshell here sweated her ass off (well let's hope) and worked legs. My muscles are shaking and I never really realised how many stairs there are in the world until today.

I have felt every one.

Do I feel good? Yes. Am I going to keep this up? Let's hope so. I really want to and I just need to stay motivated!

I go again tomorrow, to a class though (much better.)

I received this email, maybe you've seen it, maybe you haven't. I had to share it.

The Fairytale every woman should read: You need to click on it ( to see it I'm afraid but it's worth it.

Oh and this was too good not to share:

Last week I bought assorted muffins. I just saw what was supposed to be assorted muffins on the label and went on my merry way. It was only when I got home that my man got all googly eyed at the purchase. “Yummy! Can I have one? What type are they?”
“No you can’t, they’re for breakfast. They’re assorted.”
“Oh my God! You bought ass muffins.”
“What?”
“You bought ass muffins. Oh my God! That’s hilarious. I’m not sure I want to have one now.”
“What on earth are you talking about?”
“They say ass muffins on the box.”
“They do not.”
“They do! You gotta love Pick n Pay! Look!”
I bought ass muffins.

Special K's wedding

The wedding was something out of a movie. Perfect in every way. She was the calmest bride ever, except when one of the bridesmaids had that Rimmel Instant Tan Shimmer on her hands and nearly tripped. Had she tripped she would have landed on her neatly laid out wedding dress.
Oh the dress! It was absolutely GORGEOUS!! It was LITERALLY made for her and I got all teary to see my friend in her wedding gown. I have realised that she is far too modest as far as her dressing for her figure goes. We (the bridesmaids) were gawking at her waist. I couldn't resist and eventually asked her: "Um.... where exactly do your organs go? There is no room for your spleen, liver, intestines etc..."
She had the tiniest waist I have ever seen in my life. Barbie size proportions with sexy hips and a sexy bum. I was not perving over my friend (I've just re-read this and it could get some men rather excited) but I was definitely astonished. Gisele Bunchen must watch out! Seriously.

What an incredible ceremony and the reception was unbelievable. Fairy Tale style. It was held at the Michaelangelo and everything was just perfect. The food was awesome, I tasted the best creme brulee EVER. Hahahah...I sound like I'm doing a review, don't I?

Now for the funny part... 2 of the 4 bridesmaids are pregnant. They are also identical twins , Nails and Twinkles, and 3 months apart. Nails is 7 months and Twinkles is 4 months.
8 people came up to me to congratulate me on my "pregnancy."
Say what?
I find it extremely disrespectful. I wouldn't ask ever, even if her water had just broken on the middle of the dance floor. It got so bad, even my man asked me if I wanted to change.
This one woman came straight up to, put her hands on my tummy and bent down with a "coochey coochey coo" and asked me ever so sweetly, "So are you due at the same time the twins are?"
My reply (ever so sweetly): "Nails is due in two months, Twinkles is due in 5 months and I'm not pregant, I'm obviously just fat!"
The look on her face was priceless. She immediately took her hands off my stomach as if I had just developed a contagious flesh eating disease, straightened up from talking to my stomach, mumbled an "Oh. Noooo you're not fat. Um.............Oh look, theres someone I haven't seen in years. Please excuse me!"
I have never felt so exhausted in my life...it's exhausting holding your stomach in for hours at a time.

The good thing, I think, was the fact that I caught Special K's bouquet and the man caught the Garter. Not rigged, oh so awesome and instant relief I didn't have to dance with some weird bachelor!
YAY!

The night was awesome... I'm so proud of my friend. She looked so gorgeous and happy and she's married a really wonderful guy, a gentleman! It was a fairytale!