What weekend??

My week has been hectic as far as work is concerned and weird working hours, but the real chaos starts today.
I have sound check for a corporate function I’m MC-ing tomorrow, later on today; I have to be on the other side of Joburg to do 2 voice overs and then fly back to work. All of this needs to be done within a space of 2 hours today.

After work, it’s the standard get-ready-in-the-office-bathrooms for the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Model Edition Launch Party – sheesh, this was more of a mouthful than most models can consume. ;-) Couldn’t resist. Sorry.
As excited as I am to party, I really must say that standing next to bronzed, silky, skinny, cellulite and stretch mark free, “we-basically-produce-our-own powder-on-our-perfect-faces-because-we-never-shine” models; rates right up there with, um...I don’t know... glass gargling.

So that means I now have to make sure I go for the “uber glam, stylish, sexy, what this old thing? I haven’t tried too hard” look. Blondie 2 and I have to go – it’s a compulsory work thing. We’re going to sip on champagne and tell each other how amazing we look and that if Sports Illustrated ever had to do a Real Woman Swimsuit Issue, we’d be their first 2 picks. We would. Give me another glass of champers. We’ll talk about how boring it must be to look in the mirror every day and just look that gorgeous. How annoying it must be to walk around giving men whiplash.
Yawn. How boring. ;-)

I then need to be up early on Saturday morning, make sure I look like a million rand...no dollars...no euros, and head down to the corporate function. It starts in the morning and ends in the afternoon. Tomorrow night Daddy Long Leg’s is having his birthday party. I have two words. Raucous Fun.
On Sunday I get to have a slight lie-in before I go off to MC a charity function for Breast Cancer.

See? Like I said, my busiest time. I figured out how to explain it. It’s like getting on a rollercoaster. It’s exciting and thrilling but there’s no end to it and you wanna get off. Immediately.
I know I sound like I’m complaining. It’s not that I’m not enjoying what I’m doing or grateful for the amount of work pouring in, I just need a holiday. How many times can I type this in one post? Dude!
You’ll totally understand when I tell you this.
I had a break for 10 days in January 2008. I haven’t had a day off this year (other than sick leave and that DEFINITELY doesn’t count) and the last holiday I had before the 10 days in January?
2 years ago. Basically, I have had a 10 day holiday in 3 years.
See why I’m being such a crabby bitch?

Hurling Heritage Day

Oh God! I sure made up for my bitching last night. If you didn't read the previous post, I was pretty miffed out with the fact that everyone was partying up a storm and I was in bed early for a half day of work the next day. Half day, whatever. Work is work. I like to think of it as: doing my bit for the economy.
;-)

Special K, Blondie 2 and I went for a girly lunch, instead of the braai today. Let me explain.
We were supposed to have a braai with the gang, but someone had to go and get pissed last night and is hanging like a donkey on steroids.
Dude. The man is so ill and instead of being mad, I find him adorable…he reverts to a cute 8 year old boy you just want to nurse. I will never tell him this. You know why.

So, I was all super psyched for potato salad, chicken kebabs and a boerewors roll; and that craving went straight out the window. It went out the window, when I heard the man hurl his stomach contents straight down the toilet. I know this sounds bizarre and gross, but he vomits weirdly. I know there is no “right” way to vomit and I am going to sound incredibly mean, because I should be concerned, but I find it hilarious. Seriously. He makes the funniest sounds. He sounds like a combination of a hyena laughing, coughing up a fur ball and well, the general “normal” up chuck sound.
Man, it is funny. Trust me. I would say you have to be there, but that’s really sadistic isn’t it?
Can you imagine? “Hi guys, come around… you know I was telling you about the man’s weird vomiting sounds, well, I thought you should experience it first hand, so let’s feed him revolting things to make it happen. Trust me; it’s going to be the best time ever. Ever!”

Anyway, I called up the gang to find out what the vibe was with having a braai. If everyone was still keen, well, sorry for vomit boy... but they all dropped like flies... all of them were hanging. Bunch of babies.
All of them, except my best girls*. Blondie 2 and Special K were still keen to do something. I left the man lying in bed curled into the foetal position, muttering the usual: “I’m never drinking again. No really. I mean it this time. Fuck I wanna die…shit, pass me the bucket…”
I asked if he wanted me to stay, but he kind of waved me off, muttering: “Kill me.” and “Have a good time!”

We met up for sushi and Cosmopolitans. Lunch with girls is never an hour or two.
6 hours later, sun setting, several Cosmo’s in and stomachs literally sore from laughing, we called it a day.
The bill showed that we had enjoyed 13 Cosmopolitans between the 3 of us. We paid the bill and it was only when we were in the car park that we suddenly realised that made no sense. How can 3 girls share 13 cosmos? They either didn’t charge us for an extra one (yeah right) or they over charged us by one (probably.)
My head is spinning and I’m feeling a little bad. What heritage did I celebrate today? I drank Cosmopolitans – for Johannesburg (work with me here) and I ate sushi for…um… well... I’m stumped.
I bought biltong on my way home. Does that count?
The man is still on the couch, watching Absolute Formula 1 and stuffing his face with biltong and Lay’s Salt and Vinegar crisps. It helps with the nausea. Apparently. He is still hanging. Insane.
It’s another early night for me. This time, I really don’t mind. Those Cosmo’s are dangerous. Deliciously dangerous.

* I sound like a pimp. Niiiice.

Wannabe's!

I'm going to vent*. I can and I will. If you don't feel like reading the bitching, don't read any further.

I am really sick of girls who want to be celebrities in this country, SA. I have had enough of pretty girls believing the world owes them something. Their manipulation is unbelievable. The scary thing, it seems to work too. When did this become OK?
Being a celebrity is a privlege and generally comes from working hard and entertaining the masses, yes in the public eye. Actors, radio presenters, TV presenters, singers and musicians, sportsmen/women and top models are known to be celebrities.
Being a celebrity also does not give you the right to immediately assume you are any better than anyone else and diva attitudes stink.
I don't even know if celebrity is the right word for South Africa...perhaps public personalities is a better word.

I have absolutely had enough of these beautiful girls desperately wanting to be famous because they have done a bit of modelling and believe they deserve to be a top model with the "Lee-ann Liebenberg status".
While your self confidence is commendable, you actually need to work at it, instead of harrassing the different media houses and magazines to feature an article on who you are, what your favourite colour is and what your favourite position is. If you are doing something (work wise) that is worthy of recognition...then by all means, but most of these girls want to be FAMOUS and won't and don't care what for.
It is not cute, it is not amusing and it is time consuming.
These girls are manipulative, they make friends with influential people trying to get higher on the fame ladder and will stop at nothing to stab you in the back to get what they want.
It has really gotten bad.
Hard work and talent should get you to the top and that is the message that should be sent out.
Instead, the magazines are getting really annoyed at the constant emails under pseudonyms and their actual name that they eventually buckle just to rid themselves of these girls for a few months. Wrong message. These girls then feel that it works and go on to the next magazine.
Nothing ever comes from it, so they start at the beginning again.

It is irritating for people who work their asses off, who do things ethically and morally correct, who don't back stab; finish last. I think the saying: Good guys/gals always finish last... is true but it SUCKS!
It shouldn't be that way and it isn't right.

I probably sound bitter but I can absolutely assure you it's not a bitterness thing at all, it's a vent that the business world shouldn't work this way! Success should be measured by your hard work, not from harrassment, being a diva and believing you're so much better than anyone else.
Don't abuse a privlege you've been awarded...being in the public eye is hard work and my personal feeling is that...I would like people to acknowledge or recognise me because they appreciate my work and what I stand for... not for being in a magazine getting my nails done.
In a perfect world, I guess!

*I don't expect to be judged on this either. It is my opinion and it fucks me off, in a big way!