My day

I'm feeling much better today... no nerves, ha ha! I did receive an email outlining the various regulations of maternity leave etc, though. What a bloody laugh. Maybe I will "milk" this.

I'll be the first "pregnant" woman to lose weight! Ha!

I feel like everything is against me in my Weight Loss Quest.
I went to gym this morning to find out that they had closed for the morning. Have no idea why.

I order a toasted sandwich on RYE bread with salad. I was also in one hell of a rush and had 15 minutes to order, eat and get out. I let the waitron know before hand and all was great until I got my meal. My sandwich came on white bread with chips.
I was starving so I gobbled it down and I must say I feel awful for it. Not because I ate too fast, but because I think my body may just be getting used to healthy food. *Blondie does a little jig*

I'm going to watch the Strictly Come Dancing show being filmed tonight. It's going to be televised on SABC 1 tonight. One of my mates is participating and she has been working her little ass off for weeks. Very excited.

I have a big, early day tomorrow so I hope tonight doesn't turn into something raucous.

Oh dear, I'm waffling now...so with hardly any news have a great evening.

T.M.I nervous symptoms.

Alright so, I forget that some of my mates are bored enough to read my blog. They don't blog they just read mine. I am now being dragged to gym tomorrow morning with a mate. We're going at 9am. ARGH!
I guess it's the one way I'm sure to go. Shit.

Now, if you follow my blog, I am very excited about some incredible news (I'm sorry, I still can't reveal it yet, but I will...soon!)
Thing is, I thought it was a 100% done deal. Turns out that the deal is 95% done with a few worrying factors.
I am so nervous that I have a million and two butterflies flying around in my tummy. Problem: This could prove to be a case of T.M.I, so if you're squemish, read no further...)
When I get nervous I vomit.
It's attractive. I mean I'd settle for sweating, shaking, babbling like an idiot...you know, all the normal signs of nerves.
Oh no, I vomit. Beautiful hey?

I was sitting at the breakfast meeting today discussing things. I got the excited nervous feeling. Yes, there is such an emotion. I suddenly had the overwhelming nauseous feeling. Oh. Dear. Not. Now.

"Excuse me please." I squeaked, trying to keep my composure.
Thing is, with that nauseous feeling it has a "mind/stomach?" of it's own. It just kinda comes, doesn't it? You can only control yourself for so long, like breathing deeply and willing with all your might, but that ends quickly too.
So there I am, trying to remain calm as I make my way around the tables and chairs. Nope. Too strong, I had to hold my mouth and run.

They now think I'm pregnant with morning sickness and "delicately" asked me if this is going to be a problem with our new deal. Lovely.

Why oh why does this happen to me? It's a cruel joke.

Exercise horror.

I am on a major health kick at the moment. Ok, well I'm trying to be. I need to lose a few (10) kilo's in 2 months. I'm doing alright on the eating side... had the headache for the first few days but I'm slowly but surely adjusting.

Logically and realistically, I need to add exercise to this to really see the benefits.

I know some gym bunnies out there are going to gasp in horror, but the idea of exercise makes my palms sweat, my chest actually closes and I feel like I can't breathe. I am so unfit I know I'm going to DIE for the first few days.

I have also been here before and after those initial days felt fantastic and lost weight. Never managed to continue exercising though.

Each time this happens, it makes things harder to start up again.

I can find a trillion things I need to/have to/want to/must do instead of getting into my 'attractive', way-to-small grey tracksuit to work up a sweat!

Nightmarish stuff.

Just typing this blog makes me feel a little nauseous. I know I need to start somewhere but I cannot seem to get my head around this. Aaaah!!

I guess I am just in no shape to exercise! ;-)

If I could...

smack people for being STUPID, I would.

My poor TV is traumatised today. It's having its turn on the couch today... TV therapy.

I shouted at my poor TV set, I actually had neighbours pop their heads over the wall to see if anything was wrong. Nosy neighbours :-)

Let me start from the beginning. I sat in front of my TV the ENTIRE weekend. I basically only got out of my PJ's this morning. It was lovely and lazy.

I watched the South African version of the:

Now, I understand it must be nerve wrecking being on TV and your brain could feel a little blurred from the nerves. But, I AM SORRY. There is no excuse for stupidity.

The 1st 2 contestants were in high powered careers with excellent degrees. The first lady had a degree in B.Sc. She was stumped on the VERY FIRST QUESTION FOR R1000 and had to use one of the cheats. It was a 1st Grade Animal Science Question: How many legs does a couple of moths have? Her answer: 8.

Ba-bye now! You're outta here!! LOSER!

2nd dude: An ARCHITECT. He used all his cheats in the first few questions. The one he was stumped on: How many sides does a large Hexagon have?

This is this dude: "Hmmm.... I'm not sure if it's large, that could change things....um.... er.... um...."

WTF? You're an ARCHITECT!!

His answer: 8 sides.

Well that was me, finished. I was jumping up and down on my couch out of frustration. How stupid? I mean seriously. Did they pay these people to be dumb?

Then...a few hours later Bafana Bafana burst onto my screen. They played Tunisia. Well, I WAS THE COACH. Boy, let me at 'em.

I may be female and stereotyped, but Oh. My. God!

I was shouting and jumping up and down...everything short of tearing my hair out.

These were some of my hysterical shrieks:

"Bench him!"

"Shoot!!! Shoooooott!!!!"

"Awwww C'mon!!!! The wing is wide open!!!!"

"DEFEND!!!"

"Passsss the ball!!!"

"Ok show off...we know you have fancy footwork....we don't give a shit! Score!!!!!!"

plus there were a few profanities thrown around.

It was embarrassing, especially when we handed Tunisia there 3rd goal.

Helloooo?? You have 2 eyes don't you? Maybe you should look before passing. Especially when you're passing to the Goalie...um...didn't it occur to you that maybe there 5 Tunisian players there ready to score? MORON!!

Give ME the coaching job! I wouldn't mind earning a salary higher than the president of this country.

Ok, no seriously. Why are we so bad? What is the problem? Do we have low morale? What's going on. Dude. It's embarrassing!

I'm sick

to death of the bloody Race card being pulled.

I am not a racist. Let me repeat. I am NOT A RACIST!

I have incredible friends who are coloured, black etc and quite frankly I don't give a damn if you are purple with green polka dots.
I have had enough. I was 11 years old in 1994 and completely unaware of what was going on in South Africa.

I understand that Affirmative Action has to take place. Sure, realistically, it is frustrating at times, but it's understood. I'm so tired of asking someone in the office who just happens to be of colour to do something. When it's not done and I ask what's happened I get this: "You're only asking because I'm black."
HOLD. THE. BUS!
WTF? I'm sick to death of hearing that. I would do the same to the blue, green, white and orange person. It has got bugger all to do with race. It is a simple thing to ask someone when something will be done and I am ALWAYS courteous, when asking.

I get really pissed off about it. I am tired of this.

On a lighter note, I hope you have a wicked weekend. Gosh didn't I juist wish you a happy weekend yesterday? Boy this week has flown by! Have fun!!

The Other Side

How many times do you put yourself in someone elses shoes? I am a peoples person and I often think about what other people are going through. like right now, while I'm blogging, someone is sleeping, someone is being promoted or fired. Someone is losing a loved one and someone is embarking in a new journey that is life. Someone is being kissed for the first time and someone is having their heart broken. Someone is getting engaged and yes, some people are even having sex...right now.
Someone is smiling, someone is angry, someone is crying and someone is laughing with all their might.

Ever since I was a little girl, I have put myself in other peoples shoes. Sure, it's been detrimental at times where I've been walked all over, but it's just something I've always had in my essence.

Last night I went out for another "quiet" night with the girls. Ahem, got home at 3am.
Lesson 1: Always take your own car, so you can leave when you want to.
I admittedly wanted to go home about 3 hours earlier. At about 2am, I sat down to rest my painful feet *damn stilettos* The club was slowly starting to empty out and while I was sitting there, sipping on my cocktail and dragging my cigarette, I suddenly noticed something I've never noticed before. The cleaners in the club mopping the floors , picking up ciggie stompies, cleaning broken glass and generally keeping the place decent.
I noticed a really drunk bunch of guys laughing and carrying on in the not so amusing drunken state. I had just watched this petite lady sweep up all the ciggies and shards of glass around the area that the guys were standing.
Immediately the guy dropped his beer bottle, which shattered into thousands of tiny pieces. The guy then laughed and kicked the glass pieces so that they were away from him. The glass went flying over an even bigger surface and I just watched the ladies face. She looked so upset since she had just cleaned up an unecessary mess, to clean up it all over again and to clean an even bigger area than before.
I looked around the room to see groups of friends laughing, drinking and dancing and generally having a good time, completely ignorant to the fact that there were quite a few cleaners trying to make sure girls who'd abandoned their painful shoes didn't get their feet cut on glass and generally keeping the place clean. No one noticed them and if they did they ignored their existance. I watched one girl bump into a cleaner crouched down picking things up. She looked down and then looked back up again as if she had bumped into the leg of the table.
I do understand that they're paid to do this, but I put myself in their shoes. Everyone's having a good time, while they're cleaning up after us...watching us having a good time and not being able to join in because they're working. I felt really bad.

Sometimes, we just need to take a look at other perspectives every now and again. It keeps us in check and it keeps us human in this rat race world.

R.I.P Heath.

R. I. P Heath Ledger

04/04/79 - 22/01/08

I am so sad to hear the news about Australian born, Hollywood actor. What a great loss to the entertainment world. I feel especially sorry for Michelle Williams and his toddler daughter, Matilda (2.)

What a devastating tragedy. 28 years old; so young...too young.

It's really terrible to see how stressful and pressurised being in the public eye can be. A few months ago he admitted to needing sleeping pills and how they weren't working as well as he had hoped. I guess he took one too many.

I remember developing a bit of a crush on him in 1999 when he starred in "10 Things I hate about you." I liked the bad boy with a soft side character.

He really was starting to rise as a shining star in Hollywood and it just seems surreal that his life ended so soon.

His family: Dad (Kim), Mom (Sally) and sister (Kate) are devastated by the news and are saying the drug overdose is accidental.

Michelle Williams and daughter Matilda were in Sweden when the news broke. She is obviously devastated! I just can't imagine the pain and the loss they must feel.

Michelle Williams and Heath Ledger.

Doting dad with 2 year old Matilda.

WOOOOHOOOOO!!!!

Excuse me while I do flick-flacks, bounce around the room, shake my hands in the air, do the success dance, which does include shaking my ass better than Beyonce (in my dreams) and do one of those girly jump up and down screams!

I am bloody brilliant. No really. I cannot believe how chuffed I am with me, myself and I.
Honestly, I just don't know how I do it sometimes.

I proved to myself that if I put my mind to something and I really believe in it, it can become a reality. All the hardwork and boy oh boy, I mean HARD WORK has finally paid off. So it took a year, I am fucking thrilled, it only took a year!

Crack open the bubbly Blondie...oh and you, you lovely person can join me! Grab a flute! *CHEERS!*

PS> Everyone is allowed a vain moment every now and again ;-p

Weak end

I was right. The weekend was debaucherous! I got home to the man and our very funny mate Kyle, swigging beers. I joined them by opening a bottle of wine *which by the by, I'm enjoying a again..not-liking-wine must have been a phase* I was half way through the bottle when one of my model friends (we live in the same complex) arrived, much to Kyle's delight.
After we finished off the bottle of wine together we got a call from Special K. FTV Cedar Square was apparently happening and we had to get our little asses over immediately. Now you see, my man isn't a huge fan of FTV and other pretentious places - so when he jumped up and said: "Go get ready, we're going large!" I nearly dropped my half finished glass of wine.
Sometimes beer has it's advantages ;-)

Shooters are evil. They should be banned. I hate that feeling. You know the feeling I'm talking about - the one where you turn your head and wait for the world to catch up with you.
My world was spinning by midnight. We lost Special K and her fiance somewhere on the crowded "dance floor" after the 6th or 10th shooter and by 01h30, the man, T and I wrapped our arms around each other and dragged each other out. What a sorry bunch we were.

I now understand why we shouldn't mix drinks...when those drinks feel they need to resurface, it ain't a pretty colour.

Saturday was also a huge blur and I have to say I feel b-e-a-u-t-i-f-u-l today...No really. I am on top of the world. Anyone who believes that should be shot.

Anyone got a Grandpa tablet?

Couplehood

Have a great weekend!! I'm hoping to do as little as possible. Somehow, I have a funny feeling it won't turn out like that!
Ciao x

Body competitions... Really.

It took me an hour and a half to get home last night. It normally takes me 25 mins. Gotta LOVE Eskom's Load Shedding.

On the way home though, I stopped to get some ciggarettes *yes, the 'no smoking' is going well, obviously* and I found something I haven't seen in years (not that I've tried very hard to look.)
I found Wicks Bubble Gum. Well. I forgot I know how to blow bubbles! Wooohoooo!!

I popped my way into the house. I saw the man eyeing me out and I thought he was going to tell me how annoying that is.

Instead, he said: "I can't do that!"
"Can't do what?"
"Blow bubblegum bubbles."
"What? Sacriledge! You mister, never had a childhood."
"Well, I bet you can't do this!" he says and winked with each eye.
Of course, I tried and suddenly realised I can only wink with my right eye. I tried so hard to close my left eye and keep the right one open but I looked like some poor person with a twitch."
"OK fine!" I said feeling a bit defiant. "I bet you can't do this!" I placed my two index fingers in my mouth and whistled my "concert/wolf whistle."
"I can!" he said and whistled without the fingers.
"NO! You have to use your fingers!"

Well, we spent half an hour trying to figure out weird things we can do that the other can't.

It got me thinking about how strange we all truly are.

He can do the Mexican Wave with his stomach. I can't.
He can make fart noises under his armpits and I certainly can't.
He can raise both his eyebrows one at a time. I can only raise the left one.
I physically cannot bite my finger nails (or toe nails for that matter- not that I've tried. Oh dear.)

Another one bites the dust...

Well she will on the 29th of March.

My mates are all getting engaged and married, which I suppose is a natural sequence of events.

Anyhoo, I cannot believe we're at that age. On the flipside, that age lies in a bit of a grey area, doesn't it? It's not like you have to be married really young anymore and it's totally acceptable to only think about getting married in you late 20's early 30's.

Well, my mates seem to think mid twenties are a trend. A trend that's winning.

Excuse me...but I feel like it was last week when we were all asking each other what we'll be studying at university.

Society is also a little screwy. I've been with my amazing man aka The One for about 4 and a bit years. All of a sudden, WHOOSH: "When are you getting married?" from everyone. Even people I meet for the first time, who find out I'm attached ask: "Oooh, so when are you getting engaged?"

Funny though, a mate of mine who just recently got married and is still settling into marriage, is being bombarded now with: "So when are you going to have little sprogs?"

Good grief.

I still feel young. No really. Young as in, marriage is for grown ups. Debt is for grown ups. Credit cards are for grown ups. Speeding fines, thinking whats for dinner, getting excited about the fact that there's a sale on Skip Washing Powder and StaSoft etc...is for grown ups.

Now, little blondie here is going to confuse the shit out of you and contradict EVERYTHING.

I would cry hundreds of happy crocodile tears if the man proposed. It's something I secretly hope he'll do this year. And no. I'm not wanting to feel as if I'm a part of the "friends trend" either.

The upside to mates getting married is I get to be bridesmaid. Luckily I have lovely friends who don't want us to look like orange and purple polka dotted blobs...with a giant bow on the back.

Exciting stuff.

All going up in smoke.

I'm in a shitty mood I am. I tried to stop smoking today. I am delusional.

Lets start at the beginning:

I was the girl who hated cigarettes and all those who smoked. I was the evil pain in the ass at parties, who would ask for a ciggie and then break them in half, or alternatively take the smoke hanging out of a mates mouth and break it in half. I was super popular at parties.

I then met this man who was amazing and wanted to date me. I told him I would only date him in his dreams ,unless he quit smoking. God, I am amazed at how romantic I can be at times ;-)

He did. We got together. After a year together, the game started. He knew it was a personal hate of mine so when we had arguments he would light up a cigarette and blow the smoke in my face.

I got so fucked off about it, I decided to join him at his own game and snatched the box away to light one up. Coughing and spluttering, I could see how irritated he was that I was smoking. His green eyes glared at me as if I had just scooped up a piece of doggy poop and stuffed it into my mouth. Well that was it, he would light another up and so I did too and now it's been 7 years of smoking.

All of this to spite him, but actually all I did was spite myself.

Thing is, my mother doesn't know. Yes I'm half way through my twenties, but I reckon that even if I was 40 I couldn't tell her, let alone smoke in front of her.

It's all very bizarre.

I also don't believe that New Years Resolutions ever work, but I have decided this is the year of change and organisation.

Starting with my body.

I smoked my last cigarette last night at a mates house, Archers Aqua and ciggie were in one hand and mascara and teary tissues in the other. My mate has decided to break up with the schmuck. Finally.

Anyway, I don't crave ciggies. It's more habit than anything else. I get into my car, smoke. I have a cuppa java, smoke. I see someone else light up, it's a reminder: "Oh yes, I can do that too."

I have alcohol, I smoke (the biggest habit) and after meals I light up too.

Habits.

How hard can it be to just change a few habits? I have amazing will power (except for diets, but generally I'm good) and so I should be able to kick this soon.

Ha! What bloody ever! I am a cow. It's been 14 hours and I felt depressed. I have a miserably sore headache and I am no ray of bloody sunshine. So I succumbed. I bought my Marlboro Lights, lit up, exhaled and felt relieved. Aaaaah!

Now I feel guilty that it only took me a few hours and I crumbled. What is wrong with me??

I'm annoyed.

I'm BACK!!

I'm back from a well deserved holiday! It was a time for firsts! My first holiday in Cape Town and the first time I have been ready to come back home and start the year. Normally I leave and I wish I could have a few extra days of holiday!

Today is my first day back at work too and I have a good feeling about this year :-)

So, bare with me if you live in Cape Town *bastards* but as it was my first time and I just have to share what I discovered.

1.) The sun only sets at 20h30 or later, so it feels like 3pm for hours! What an incredible thing.
2.) Everything, I mean everything surrounds the Mowwwntain (said just like that.)
3.) The wind hurt my ears. It blows a gale there. The only time I've felt wind like that is back in Joburg when a freak storm is about to hit.
4.) It is absolutely beautiful. Every single place has an amazing view.
5.) Beaches are incredible with white sand that look like white ribbons twisting off in the distance.
6.) Waters are turquoise but if you pop a toe or limb in you will get frostbite. I learnt this the hard way.
7.) I never understood this thing about "cliques" in CT. Boy oh boy I got a tasted of that...in a big way. We were invited to a braai by some mates of ours down on holiday too. They were the only ones who spoke to us. Interesting.
8.) On the flipside, service staff were so friendly and helpful, my man and I eyed them out suspiciously for the first few days.
9.) We ate breakfast, lunch and dinner at a different restaurant for 10 days and didn't make a dent in the Culinary World that is Cape Town.
10.) Kite Surfing is HUGE in Blouberg.
11.) Cape Point is breath taking.
12.) Table Mountain (Mowwwntain) really is flat on top. Yeah, go ahead, laugh at me.
13.) I visited Sandy Bay (the nudist beach) ..... TWICE! How invigorating and free! Very different to what I expected. I was expecting to walk onto a beach that looked as packed as Clifton/ Camps Bay with nude people everywhere. There were maybe 7 people at a time. I oggled ALOT! I couldn't help it.
14.) Long Street is awesome and edutainment.
15.) It feels very European in an African kind of way. Does that make sense?


I could go on and on! I put on 4kgs or more and I have a tan! Can I get a WHOOP WHOOP?
It was an incredible holiday!

I have to say though. It's good to be back! I've missed blogging *don't tell anyone, or I might fall into the Blogger Nerd Category*

Right, it's time to catch up on all your blogs :-)

Ciao for now!
x