Thursday, December 4, 2008

Tours and Waxes

It is always fascinating travelling in a car with colleagues. Especially funny and entertaining colleagues. I was with 2 of them. We were driving back to the office, when A started jumping up and down in the backseat. I have never seen someone get so excited about driving through the area she lives in.
"Oooh oooh ooooh! My house is down there. Aww, we could always blow this and go and have tea and cake at my house instead. Who is keen? My pug would love it."
G and I looked back and packed up laughing. "Your pug would love it?"
"Well she's blind, but I know she would. Seriously."
We continued to get a quick tour.
"This is my hood, people. Seriously don't mock it. Oooooh, I had my first snog there and I vomitted into those pot plants...right...THERE! My ex ex ex lives down that road. My friend Michelle lives three roads down from that. Ooooh, I've egged that house. Hated her. She deserved the egg throwing and plant pinching episode. I used to live down that street..."
And so it went on. I think G was watching her from the rear view mirror and I was literally in hysterics. She was so excited about this and kept showing us arb places and things. Emmerentia and Greenside will never be the same for me ever again.

Blondie 2 and I spoke about waxing last night. We waxed lyrical I guess, about the painful ripping of hairs. Blondie 2 totally digs it. I would rather dive into a vat of boiling oil. OK. Maybe not, but that is how it feels. If I can avoid it, I will. We got talking about cookie waxing. I know. Girls!
Blondie 2 is obsessed with it. I had a painful experience and told her as much.
B2: "Obviously your first time is going to be sore. It's like sex. The more you do it, the less and less painful it becomes."
BB: "Nice. I still hate it. I mean seriously. How embarrassing. All my life to spread my legs for a female stranger who wants to chit-chat while spreading wax and momentarily ripping the Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh out of me."
B2: "Oh please. Seen one; seen them all. Besides, she's probably been doing this for years and she's going to be waxing 20 more cookies that day."
BB: "And that is what I'm afraid of. There is no beautician confidentiality code...I'm sure they all sit there chatting about them. Like: 'Oh my God. You should have seen this one...' you know?"
B2: "You have issues. No c'mon, it's great. Besides, I have to go. I haven't waxed in, like, 6 weeks and they are probably out to here!"
She indicated the length and I nearly fell off my chair.
BB: "Holy shit chick. WTF? Impossible...I mean, sure...if you're ghd-ing your pubes!"
That was it. We were hysterical over the mental images.

20 comments:

Being Brazen said...

Her pug would love it!! - classic

Tamara said...

GHDing your pubes? Where do you get this stuff?

mylifescape said...

hilarious... what a tour! i need to find a good waxer... any suggestions?

PS: Something on my blog for you

Tay said...

What an entertaining journey - LOL! The mental images I have of GHDing pubes is too much! Can't stop laughing!

Kitty Cat said...

I am totally with you on the waxing! Why not get them laser-removed? And I don't think it gets less painful over time, and then there are all those ingrown hairs to contend with...I've tried.

Ha ha- ghd-ing them. That'd be a sight! Or not.

Mrs.D said...

Did some terrible, sadistic man invent the trend of waxing to no end?? I think so.

The Blonde Blogshell said...

LOL - it was classic BB, G and I literally turned around together and gave her the WTF look at exactly the same time. That was classic.

The Blonde Blogshell said...

Tamara...it was the funniest thing ever...the way she gestured the length was ridiculous...sure...it's that long if you're a) in scary movie or b) you're straightening them with a ghd.
Hahahahahahahahaah - oh those visuals again.

The Blonde Blogshell said...

You are the dearest... thanks Mylifescape!! I am useless with waxers, but I'll clearly ask the fundie...Miss Blondie 2.

The Blonde Blogshell said...

Tay - it was hilarious...I have laughed so much - now where is my six pack? LOL

The Blonde Blogshell said...

Laser is a great idea...just hectic! oh and ingrown hairs are my ABSOLUTE WORST!!!! AAAARGHHHHH!!!!

The Blonde Blogshell said...

Probably Mrs. D...bastards!

zuzula said...

I involuntarily crossed my legs while reading this!

3rm said...

so this is the blonde blogshell. is it really a registered trademark?

po said...

ghding the pubes. mwahahaha

Moe Wanchuk said...

Hey....seeing I'm probably going to lose my job soon, what do you think of ME being a Cookie Waxer?

The Blonde Blogshell said...

Zuzula - I know...it truly freaks me out! Dammit...why do we need to do this?? Argh!

The Blonde Blogshell said...

3RM - it's YOU!!! Thanks for popping by - I'm chuffed!

Yes...it is. Maybe. In my head. It looks cool, OK? Ha!

The Blonde Blogshell said...

Po, I still can't that image out of my head!! Bahahaha!!!

The Blonde Blogshell said...

Moe... that would certainly be interesting...um... what would you call it?
The Moe-hawk wax? Lovely.