Croatia and Switzerland

Wow. It's been a while. The last time I blogged it was a month after break up. Well it's now 3 and a half months since the break up and I am really good. Hell, I'm impressed with myself. I am stronger than I thought.

Sometimes it still hurts, like finding out he has a new girlfriend when his reason for breaking up was that he couldn't be in a relationship with anyone and needed to find himself...Oh look at that... a month after our break up, he got himself a new girlfriend. Men.

The good news? He really does make it easier to move on and get over him.

Croatia is ridiculous. I am sorry. It is not possible for a place to be THAT gorgeous and magical. Unless you've been there, I can't actually describe how MAGICAL the place is. The ocean is turquoise. There is no beach sand, so the clean, clear water is warm and extremely salty. You literally float and bob (no treading water) - it's amazing.

The culture is warm, friendly and welcoming. It doesn't matter who you are, you are welcomed and welcomed warmly. We swam from our villa to another island about 600/700m away and when we got onto the beach, a warm, friendly woman invited

us into her stone home for coffee. Incredible. Coming from South Africa, we obviously we skeptical and wondering if we were walking into a sex-trade syndicate. Kidding. But you do feel guilty for feeling so on guard when people are so friendly and genuine.

The villages are just gorgeous with lots of stone homes and buildings, cobbled streets, wild olive trees, vineyards, gorgeous cafes, shops to die for, shoes to die for, the vegetables and fruit are just too delicious. I have been spoilt with the taste of genuine olive oil, home made wine and the potatoes and tomatoes are something else.

It was exactly what I needed. My soul completely rejuvenated! I bonded even more with my amazing-don't-know-what-I-would-do-without-them girlfriends. We had fun regardless of what we did, from the car trips and ferry trips to the walking around the cobble streets, hav

ing coffees, lying in the sun listening to music, shopping, taking taxi boats from island to island listening to Croatian bands while drinking G&T's, finding children play areas and satisfying our inner child, cooking together, our wine drinking, sitting in peace and watching the ocean, our coffee and chocolate tradition before bed and our laughs. I will never forget this trip. It was the best trip I have ever had.

Dubrovnik

The Stone Villas where we stayed - we had the place to OURSELVES!!

The view from our villas.

Vela Luka.

Special K and my feet on the speed boat :-)

Split - best place for shopping :-)

I also had the pleasure of going to Switzerland... I haven't seen my gran, cousins, uncle and rest of the family in 5 years. I don't really know much about my Swiss family and spending time with my 81 year old gran was just so amazing. I found out things about her and my late grandfather, found out things about my dad, how he was when he was little, all the stories etc etc ... It's made me learn more about who I am and where I come from. The last time I saw my grandpa, I was 9 years old (1992) and he passed away in 2001. I learnt so much about him and there are several things about his personality and character and even his hobbies, that now make so much sense... I have a lot of them and never knew where they came from. Awakening.

I've also only ever been to Switzerland in winter. It was most bizarre to not see the country covered in snow. Instead, it almost looked fake. I have never seen such greenery everywhere. It was so lush and I honestly think the alps looked like they are covered in green felt material.

It was quite something to think that in one morning, I had been in Croatia lying in the sun on the beach and then not even 14 hours later, I was hiking in the alps and standing in snow that had fallen and was starting to melt.

The photos I took, looked like I had doctored them. Incredible.

Switzerland is such a clean country and it's so efficient. If the train says it will leave at 15h03 ... it leaves at 15h03, not 15h04 or a second after. Wow.

It was a whirlwind trip and I travelled around Switzerland within 6 days, I even crossed into Germany for a day. It's amazing how easy that is in Europe.

The food. Don't get me started on the food and the chocolate. *drool*

Davos

April Fools Day

I got pranked. Not once, but twice. Wow. I got a message from Special K this morning (in my defence I had just woken up and didn't know the date yet, let alone what day it was) saying that she was pregnant. I called her immediately, my mind already planning her baby shower only to hear a chuckle and a hearty: "April Fools!!!"
Bugger.

I thought I was done for the day, now being completely aware, when I got a call from this woman.
"Hi, is this Miss Blogshell?"
"Yes it is."
"Hi there, I'm phoning from Vodacom. I've been calling all our Blackberry clients today. Unfortunately the monthly fee that you pay which allows you unlimited access to internet, email and BB chat/IM is no longer feasible. We are alerting all our clients to the fact that we are going to start charging you for every email, IM and minute used on internet. We're having to disconnect your services until a payment is made upfront. We've had a look at your usage and I'm afraid that you are going to need to pay R5000."
"What?? You're kidding me. R5000? I know I am on my Blackberry all the time but R5000? Is this an April Fools Joke?"
"I'm so sorry about this...I've been getting that question all day, but I'm afraid it's no joke. We'll be sending you a letter to explain everything."

I put the phone down, completely seething. What the hell is the point of having a BB then? I know that R5000 seems ridiculous, but with the amount of time I spend using those facilites, nothing would surprise me.

10 minutes later, my dad called me saying that he had just received a phone call from Vodacom. When I originally got my contract back in the day, I wasn't able to sign surety, so my dad did. He told me that they had called him asking him if he was good for R5000. I started to explain everything when he stopped me and said... "April Fools!!!"
"Wh-What?"
I just hear the office pack out laughing. His bloody naughty secretary had been the "lady from Vodacom" and they got me good and proper. Little shits!!

My Blackberry is fondly called my Crackberry because it's my addiction. I might as well superglue it to my hand. It's ridiculous, I know. I can't help it though.

Well bloody done! Dad - you got me good!!

Grins

I am having a ball. No really. Is it possible to be having this much fun and be feeling this good?

I know you'll be reading this on a "Blue Monday" and so I may just be nauseating right now. Yes I have bad days and I'm not all rays of sunshine all the time, but right now, I am and while I feel like this, I am going with it. Work with me here.

Weekend is all a bit of a Blur. In a good way. Friday, was interesting... I was a part of a fashion show. Again, I am always quite perturbed that I get asked to do these things. It's not a fishing party right now, but I don't model. I am not a fashion hanger in any shape or form and so it is hilarious. I did this for a childrens charity with some Binnelander and Egoli stars. I wonder if all professional models run thoughts like: "Suck in your tummy! Shoulders back! Don't trip; don't trip..." through their minds. It was a high fashion, think European FTV channel fashion show with the weird make-up and hair and clothes I wouldn't wear out in public. It was fun to be a part of this experience, don't get me wrong, but I wish I could have taken a photograph of the looks I got from the models when I asked a simple question back stage. "To smile or not to smile, that is the question." I wanted to know what "look" we were supposed to be doing with high fashion, dark eyebrows and red lips. Were we supposed to smile or were we supposed to look like we were in pain or bored. I am always fascinated how these models portray their faces down the catwalk...the pained expressions are probably from not eating or shoes that are too small. I experienced this on Friday.

A little blurry, but here are two of the models...

High fashion make-up

Well, in case you were wondering, I was told not to smile from a model (striking features, mind you) who looked me up and down disdainfully, flicked her high-fashioned-teased hair and minced onto the ramp. So I didn't smile and I felt ridiculous. I have to smile. I am a smiley-person and if I can't smile when I want to, I take on a pained expression. Perhaps, that's it.

I had fun though and I got to gaze at the male models that really are quite beautiful. This one in particular looked exactly like Emile Hirsch and I embarrassed myself by staring too long and hard and then subsequently blushed furiously when he asked for my number.

Saturday was spent having breakfast at a quaint restaurant with the family and looking at cars. I have decided to get myself a new car. I felt guilty as I test drove these beautiful cars. Guilty because I felt like I was "cheating" on my car parked at home. I am still driving my very first car and she has certainly served me well for the past 7-8 years, but she's old now and so I am fickly trading her in for a new model. I'm excited.

I went to a braai that night at JB and had a blast drinking glasses of wine and playing 30 seconds...or tried to at least. My poor team mate must have been "chuffed" at being on my team. 2 bottles of wine will do that to you. I pretty much played like this:

"Um...um... It's the actress...um...shit....what's her name...oooh...ooh..ooooh...um....."

"TIME!!" Everyone yelled out, gleefully.

Normally I am a little champ at the game but with wine and shooters, I was useless at it.

I did however, see European Boy. This whole... yes, I can't believe these words came out of my mouth: "Let's just have fun and enjoy each others company with no strings attached" is very new for me and I'm certainly having fun.

I feel like a teenager again.

Today has been spent feeling sorry for myself, lying in bed catching up on all the Girls of The Playboy Mansion episodes and catching up with Sugar. She came to visit me and we giggled like school girls.

Oh and yes...here she is...looking smoking hot...man, I want a body like this and if she can go from looking how she did to looking how she does now...I have HOPE!! HOORAY!! I'm back to gym tomorrow!

Movie Mania

I've fallen off the gym wagon. Nooooo. I hate being sick. I refuse to go to gym when I am, but unfortunately I really struggle to get back into the routine of it. I know that I should be ridiculously thrilled and motivated considering I have lost 7kgs, but for some horribly strange reason I just don't operate like that!
Sugar and I are feeling nasty and even though I'm not eating badly, I feel so much better when I go to gym. See? Even that statement should show that technically if I feel better when I go, it should be easy. Um. No.
I think there is something wrong with me.

Saw Marley and Me last night and I loved every minute of the movie. It was great. Brought back so many memories of my labrador puppy. I donated her to the South African Guide Dogs Association (the hardest thing I have ever done...bitter sweet) and went to her graduation a year ago actually. She is now a full fledged Guide Dog working with Bennie, her blind owner. Anyway, so I laughed and cried through the movie. Walked out with mascara on my chin and popcorn in my cleavage. Shit, I don't know how this always happens to me, but I seriously, always find stray popcorn bits stuck in the bra. Attractive.

I have been awake since 5am this morning. Now, this is normal for most, I get that. Excuse my brat behaviour now. But SERIOUSLY. Are we not supposed to be in summer? Why was it dark and cold. It should be illegal. I was up at 5am, to leave by 6am for the University of Johannesburg. My sister was graduating today...she received her BA Honours in Marketing Communications and missed cum laude by a few percentage. Poor darling! I am extremely proud of her!
My entire family attended the ceremony and we all went for a celebratory lunch in Parkhurst afterwards. It was lovely.
As a result of me being awake since 5am, I felt like the day should be over by 1pm, not half way through. I cannot stop yawning.

Tomorrow my department is going out for lunch and we're doing curry. Should be good fun! Great way to pass over a Friday 13th. Second one this year. Hope this brings lots of luck.

Tonight I have a movie with E.B. and I think we're either seeing The Curious Case of Benjamin Button or Slumdog Millionaire. Excellent, because I've been dying to see both!
I know that we're both tired, so hopefully we wont be snoring through it. :-)

Hmmm...I think I have seen more movies in the past 2 months than I have in 6 years.

Don't read if you get queasy!

Isn't it funny how quickly life can change.On Saturday afternoon I had just finished having tea and Valentines cupcakes with my family out on the patio, when I went to get ready for the Valentines Ball.

I was in the bathroom about to start make-up when my mom rushed into the bathroom as pale as a ghost. I have never seen my mom like this and worry immediately set in."Um, um, um, um.... Where is the portable phone? We need to phone an ambulance immediately!!"
WTF?

I walked around the corner and nothing could have prepared me for that. It's amazing how many thoughts can run through your mind in a fraction of a second. It looked like a massacre had occurred in my home.
There was blood everywhere, on the walls, puddles of blood on the floor, matter in the blood and just horror. There were two thoughts that entered immediately.
Someone in my family has had a terrible accident or someone has attacked my family and my mom got away.
I had my phone in my hand, already dialing the ambulance and I cancelled it to call the police. My dad had consequently called the ambulance and I cancelled the call to the police when I walked into the other bathroom. Lying in my bathtub was a young 18 year old girl, with her 19 year old boyfriend in the bath hovering over her.Her face was a bloody pulp. It was like something out of a disgusting horror movie. Flaps of skin were hanging down, her face was broken and the blood... The blood.

The two of them had been driving around our estate as Learner Drivers looking for their dog.They had been coming up our road travelling really slowly, when 3 ten year old boys on their bicycles had picked up the dog and were riding down our road looking for the owners.They stopped their car and the boys handed the dog to them through the drivers window. What happened after that is completely a freak accident. The dog jumped down onto the floor and onto the guys foot on the accelerator. They drove full force into a tree and this poor girl went straight into the windshield.

I ran around trying to get towels, but not really being able to use them because we couldn't stop the bleeding by adding a pressure on a broken face and skull. I mixed up sugar water and tried to get them both to drink it. Her parents finally arrived and we tried to warn them not to get a fright (yeah right) when they saw her. They freaked out and rushed her to the hospital before the ambulance got there. There was no point in waiting! We've been feeling guilty, because in the terror and adrenaline of everything, we didn't think to do that ourselves.

The most surreal thing of it all was that half an hour later, I was in my evening dress off to the ball (I was working.)It was crazy.

We've been getting updates of this poor girl and it is just horrific. The flaps of skin? Her eyelid and they had to reconnect that. She broke her eye socket and left side of her face. She lost all the skin and tissue on her face and is going to need 5 or 6 reconstructive surgeries.
She is a model and now her face is never going to be the same again. We hope that the plastic surgeons will do the most amazing job, but she needs so many skin graphs that it's going to be difficult for her face to not have scars.
Her poor boyfriend is riddled with guilt because of the accident; he is in his first year Medical School and he kept saying that he did everything wrong for the situation plus he was wearing his safety belt and he should have ensured that she was too! Poor things!

Life can change so quickly and it's just another reminder that even if you're driving around the block, wear your safety belt!! I was in a horrific car accident in 2001 and the only thing that saved my life was a safety belt (something that I never used to wear - terrible habit that changed very quickly when I got a second chance at life....we'll leave that story for another day!)

Birthday Weekend

On Friday night I had my Twenty Sexy Birthday Party at Cedar Square. I hired out a private dining room and bar and had all my good friends there for dinner and drinks. It was absolutely fantastic. I had to drink so many birthday drinks that I am surprised I lasted as long as I actually did!
We landed up at FTV and eventually left at 3am. It was a total blast, even if I didn’t feel the same the next day.

I spent most of the day trying to recover for Sugar’s Twenty Sexy birthday party. It was at Colony Arms for the karaoke. I was warned that we would probably be the oldest there and not to expect too much. Um. Ok.
Well I felt as if I was surrounded by twelve year olds and I was back in my student days with drinks costing the bare minimum. It was great fun. I owned Britney Spears’ One More Time in karaoke. I even did some of the dance moves. Yes I did. What? The drinks were cheap. I met all of Sugars friends...great group of people... especially a certain someone;someone that caught my eye. But, *sigh* they left early so there went that idea! Haha! Just kidding!

I eventually went home at 1am and avoided the road blocks. Metro Cops had stopped striking so I think they were making up for lost time.

Sunday morning was spent driving to Hartebeespoort Dam with my family to a place called The Windmill. It sells organic fruit, vegetables, freshly baked bread, homemade jams and cheeses, amazing meat selections and so on. We love going there, stocking up on gorgeous foods and enjoying the drive with the roof down of the car and taking in the fresh air.

I got back just in time to get ready for the twins 30th birthday party at Longmeadow’s. Tables were set out in the garden and it was really beautiful... speeches were made, the most delicious food was served...don’t get me started on the chocolate brownie and white chocolate birthday cake. I went to spinning today and I think I just worked off the cake.

The Twins cutting their birthday cake!

Right so, after a hectic weekend, Monday night was spent in bed. Nope. It was spent at very good friends home. Survivor and his fiancé cooked Burmese chicken with a coriander and pear salad. Chocolate Soufflé was served for desert with chocolate tot glasses, Bailey’s Irish Cream and champagne. I laughed and laughed and had the best night. I only got home after midnight.

The single life is great… I’m doing whatever I like, how I like it and according to my style. Selfish? Not at all. I’m connecting with all the people I really love and never got a chance to spend as much time with as I liked. It’s not to say that I didn’t spend time with my friends, it’s just that I’m getting to spend MORE time with them. It’s wonderful.

BIRTHDAY!!

I'm TWENTY SEXY today!! Yes I am.

I have had one of the most special birthdays and have felt like a billion (not Zim) dollars today! I have been completely spoilt!

My family gave me the most beautiful gifts... I received a satin pencil skirt from my sister, Thomas Sabo star charm with small diamonds for my Thomas Sabo bracelet and a phenomenal 3 piece luggage set for my travelling.

My mom, dad and sister took me out for a delicious birthday breakfast.

I got home and then Special K took me to Byzance for lunch. It was perfect. We overlooked the lake, watched the rain and ate mushrooms with artichoke pesto & halloumi croutons and choux with goats cheese and spiced figs.

To end it off we drank warm Irish coffees and had the most amazing chat about love, life and friendship. It was so special. She gave me the most beautiful BVLGARI necklace. SPOILT!!

The messages of love have poured in and I'm feeling so incredibly special!

Tonight I am going home to have a delicious home cooked meal with champagne with the family!

Friday night is my birthday party! I. am. so. so. so. excited!

Last day of my Mid Twenties

It is my last day of my quarter life crisis. Tomorrow I turn Twenty Sexy.

I am normally soooo excited about my birthday but I don't know if it's because of what's been going on or if I'm just blergh about being on the wrong side of 25.
Yes, yes...I'm still 4 years from 30, but seriously. These past 6 years flew by...um...

I'm sure that tomorrow will be all very lovely. Nothing a big fat piece of chocolate cake can't sort out.

Speaking of cake (or the lack of) I am down 5kgs so far. See? A break up can be a good thing.
Just kidding.

No seriously, I have always done boxing and as much as I love it, I haven't really seen as many results as I'd like to...perhaps it's just my body shape. Must be, because the women in my class all turned into buff goddesses. I was tired of being the blob in the class and so I decided to actually use my Virgin Active account - something I payed for every month and never used.
I started on the 5th January and although I've been pretty good, I didn't get a chance to go at all last week. I am doing shit loads of cardio, pilates and today I did my very first spinning class. Mother of ...
I was so stiff and sore five minutes after the class that I'm sure I'm going wake up tomorrow feeling like an old lady and no, it's not because I'm a year older.
The burn is all worth it. I will get down to my goal weight and I must be honest, I am feeling fantastic seeing the results.
It also helps being back at home... my family is amazingly healthy and I have been eating 3 meals a day, which to some is normal; to me it really was pure laziness.
Take today for instance... a fresh salad with tomatos and yellow peppers, fresh asparagus and tuna. Delicious, easy and healthy.

Tomorrow I will cheat and have lots and lots of cake. Hooray!

Oh and on a completely different note...Monte Casino is holding the SA Tennis Open. I went to watch last night. It was my first live tennis match and I loved every minute of it. I loved it so much that I bought tickets to go again tonight. Last night I watched Doubles of Kevin Anderson (SA) and Tsonga (French) play against two Spaniards. We then watched the single match between Cypriot Marcos Baghdatis and our very own Andrew Anderson. I loved the "challenges" when a player doesn't agree with the umpire. They turn to the electronic device that shows us where the ball lands. It's the small things you see? I loved it when the crowd went: Oooooooooh in the big build up to see where it lands and then everyone either goes: Yay! or Awww!
It was great.
Tonight I'm going to watch Tsonga and a SA dude. Fun.

Chapters in my life

This weekend involves:

Dinner tonight at a very beautiful, trendy restaurant.
Pilates.
A birthday party, where I am going to wear a new dress I bought and team it with my suicidal stilettos and dance the night away with my mates.

and then...

I'm moving all my furniture out on Sunday and I have all my mates and family coming to help me. I'm going to need a stiff drink or three afterwards, so the deal is that once we've moved and put my things into storage, we're going to go out and slurp cocktails.... they'll certainly symbolize the end of a chapter and the start of a new one.
I'm feelin OK about Sunday...but I don't know how brave I'll be on the actual day. Thank GOD for Special K, Blondie 2, Sugar, mom, dad and my sister who are going to be there!

I have received a few messages from someone and they have made me smile. It's good to know there is life after "death" :-)

2am

I treated my mate Sugar and I (we're both going through break ups) to prawns last night. What was supposed to be one glass of wine, turned into three...or was it four? For me, one glass of wine is already a danger zone. For some reason I can drink plenty (well...I'm called Florence because I nurse my drinks) of mixed drinks or bottled drinks, even two or three cocktails and feel cool...but give me one measily glass of wine and I'm ready to shake my ass on the table with a "Yeeeehah!!" That would not have been appropriate at Adega. On a Wednesday night.

We ended up getting kicked out of Adega and moved onto the Corner House. Oh good grief. It is a house that has been converted into an Irish Pub and anything goes. If you're under thirty you're way too young and if you're dressed up like you're going to an FTV you are going to stick out like a sore thumb...a fashionable sore thumb. Dancing is not a group act...it's partnered up.
I can't remember the last time I was a) asked to dance and b) danced with a guys hand on my back with a few twirls and dips thrown into the mix.
It was fun. One of the things that freaked Sugar and I out, was the fact that the majority of the men there were old enough to be our dads and some of them our grandfathers. They all have hungry eyes and you know exactly what I mean by that. The worst was being winked at or my favourite, having this guy lick his lips in my direction. I wasn't sure if he was trying to put his dentures back in with no hands or if that was supposed to be some sort of "Hey baby..How you doin'?" pick up.
Ewww.

Anyway.

It is incredibly weird to be back at home. I haven't lived under my parents roof in four years. It is absolutely wonderful in some instances and in others, not so much. I am loving the fact that I have my mom and dad around. I haven't eaten this well or this healthy in ages and my dad brings me a cup of tea every single morning with his cheerful sing-songy "Good morning sunshine!"
My mom plays with my hair and gives me plenty of hugs. We sit watching Ugly Betty and Greys together and I'm just really enjoying the luxuries of being home. I haven't had to worry about what I'm going to cook for dinner, about buying dishwasher or Handy Andy and they've told me that I don't need to pay rent. God, I am lucky. I told them that at the moment I am really enjoying not having to be an "adult", but that it isn't unappreciated (I'm no spoilt brat) and that as soon as I can "breathe" again I will happily assist with things like cooking meals, buying groceries and so forth. I've been told not to be silly, but I can't just lounge around doing nothing..I just have to pull my weight or I wouldn't feel right (that and the fact that I may just used to it.)
My mom and dad are just so happy that I'm home and I wanted to cry out of happiness.

However, I am getting the sms' during the day like:
"Blondie, it's mom. Are you going to be home for dinner? I need to know how many steaks to take out of the freezer and how many vegetables to cook. Love you."

"Blondie...it's mom. I don't want to nag, but it's 01h30. What time will you be home? You do know it's raining out don't you? I hate you driving on the roads. Would you like dad to come and follow you home? This is not good for your body. Love Your No. 1 Fan."

(My mom has always called herself my No. 1 Fan and I could just gobble her up...she doesn't realise how much that means to me.)

It is awfully sweet, but I haven't had to think of these things in years and I feel like a selfish shit because I'm getting annoyed. When I stumbled in this morning at 02h00 my mothers bedroom lamp flicked on I got the "This is no time for a young lady to be coming home during the week" lecture.
I... um... have been doing this for years and I'm impressed that I'm home at 2am.

It's just huge adjustments all around, but I wouldn't have it anyway. My family are absolute angels and I am the luckiest girl in the world.

A Decade of me

I wrote a meme about my Decade. It was probably the longest post I have ever written and I've deleted it. I know one person read it and that's cool, but it suddenly occurred to me that there is way too much information in here. I'm a very open person and that can be detrimental. I'm glad I wrote it and I've kept it on file for myself. I think this was more of a personal thing for me to reflect. Whoever started the meme is genius. I have also realised I don't actually know HOW to be impersonal or discreet. I wrote my full story out (in detail), which took me a few hours to do and it probably would have taken you a good 15 minutes to read.
LOL

I have deleted the post and started again with less info...you will see how I struggle with that considering there is still a lot of info here...but hey! This is ME!!


1998: I was 15 years old and took subjects that would help me be a doctor one day. I sucked dreadfully a maths and science. All I wanted to do was entertain and I knew my calling was to do that. I was a cultural child who took part in singing, drama, public speaking, debating etc... I also made the mistake of saying: "I'd never been drunk before" and my lovely friends ordered me 8 double shots of tequila. I was so ill that I was close to having my stomach pumped and I have never touched and will never touch tequila again.

1999: I was a true Sweet Sixteen: Never been kissed before. I turned sixteen and a month later I met drama boy. My first kiss was lovely and teenage giddiness set in. I started dating him. We dated for over a year and things changed when he wanted to sleep with me. I didn't want to...I wanted to wait and he got so mad.

2000: I was in Matric. All my friends and all his friends knew weeks before I did that he was going to dump me. He did and I was devastated. My first boyfriend and my first breakup. I wanted to tell my best male friend that I had feelings for him. My best girl friend encouraged me and then proceeded to make out with him the night I was going to tell him. I met a lovely, gorgeous boy who was in Post Matric and we started dating. He swept me off my feet and we hade such fun. I matriculated and couldn't wait to start the journey to my career I had dreamed about for ages.

2001: This is my most eventful year. I started studying BA Journalism. I found out that my grandfather in Europe had passed away. The last time I saw him was 1992. I was 9. I mourned more for the loss of not having known him. I was entered into a Beauty Pageant and made it to the Top 10. My self esteem was picked up and I met 2 of my closest friends I have today. Special K and JB. Post Matric Boy broke my heart and I never knew why he broke up with me out of the blue. I never saw him or spoke to him again and always wondered what had happened. I found out this year after physically bumping into him. I heard everything that I had hoped to hear 7 years ago. 7 years too late. 2 months after the break up, I was involved in a horrific car accident with JB and Pageant Boy. Our car rolled, I had to be cut out of the car and the paramedic thought my neck might be broken. All 3 of us walked out of there with sever whiplash and other injuries. We had survived something that no one should have.
My grandmother (I was closest to her) was diagnosed with Pancreatic Cancer and she died 3 months later. Her husband died suddenly too a month before she did. It was crazy. I failed 3 1st year subjects. I did however start with a company in order to start paving my career path way. I was 18 years old when I started. I also started Designer Boy around this time. I had met him at the CD store I worked at on weekends.

2002: Second year varsity. I was entered into my universities RAG Queen Beauty Pageant. I made the Top 20, then the Top 5 and I won Miss Enthusiastic (don't laugh) and was chosen as the People Choice Miss RAG Queen. There were 2 titles. One for the actual pageant and one where the students voted for their RAG Queen - People Choice. I studied my ass off and got an opportunity to work for a company that was fantastic to pay my dues, hone my skills and learn about the industry. Designer boy and I had fun but we weren't sure if we were right for each other. We denied this for a while until...

2003: I completed my 3rd year, plus I finished the 3 1st year subjects I had failed and graduated with flying colours. I was still working at this company and it was a tough year. Classes in the morning, rush to the show, rush back and do afternoon classes and complete assignments in the evening. I met my man at the company and it was love at first sight. People always said that to me and I used to tell them to read another Mills & Boon. Haha!! I got it, though, for the first time ever. I broke up with Designer boy and started dating my man!

2004: I turned 21 years old and had the most incredible birthday party!!
I was feeling frustrated at the company. I had reached the ceiling professionally and needed to grow even more. My man encouraged me and helped me. I sent off "CV's" to various companies and eventually got the call from the company I am at today. I started training and then started BAM! 4 days later.

2005: 2 days after my 22nd birthday I moved out of home. I moved into a quaint, tiny garden cottage. It was perfect. I felt like an independant woman and suddenly realised how tough it was out of the nest. It was an amazing lesson. I got an incredible "promotion" if you will and it was a huge break in my career. My profile was rising and it was overwhelming. I got sucked into the celebrity world and my head grew waay too big. I am truly glad and blessed that I have such amazing friends, family and my man that keep me grounded. Let me tell you, we are all human and it's easy to get wrapped up in a glossy glam world that falsely tells you it "adores and loves you". It's destroying when you start believing it's true and real.

2006: I moved into my man's new home in October. I had all these idea about how I was going to transform his bachelor pad into a pad for 2, until I realised how naive I was in a) trying to change things and b) expense.

2007: Special K and I decided to create our own opportunity in this industry. The entertainment industry has so many dimensions to it and I want to explore. We started our own company in order to start working on a special project, after being told that we'd never make it in a cut throat / mans world. They were wrong. We surprised not only them but ourselves.

2008: We've had a few set backs with the economic climate, but we're feeling positive that this project will be a huge success. We've put enough blood, sweat and buckets of tears into this! With that said, I actually laugh every single day. My man and I are strong - I love him to death and don't know what I would do without him. I have the most amazing friends and family and I feel blessed every day.

I have grown as a person, I have had been given plenty of lessons to learn. I laugh every day, I cry sometimes too but if I had to have a choice to go back I don’t think I would. Sure, I often say: if I had the knowledge I have now and had the chance to go back in time, I’d do it! Honestly though, I don’t think I would. Things happen for a reason to make you grow as a person and to mould the woman that I am becoming; if I had to go back and change things I might not be the same person I am today.

Lady Luck hates my mom.

I shake my head. My poor, poor mom! I cannot get over how much bad luck she has been through. She has been poked, prodded, squashed, squeezed and everything under the sun from MRI scans, to lumber punctures, to blood tests, to ultra sounds, to CAT scans etc, you name it!
She has waited patiently and nervously for the results and she has been diagnosed with a disease that out of privacy and respect I'd rather not say on my blog.
She is on so much medication, that it scares me. No one bothered to tell her that one of the many things she's on decreases bone strength and density. My mom stepped down from a small step at home, twisted her ankle and fell. She has broken her ankle bone straight off and her leg bone, the thibea (sp?).
This is outrageous! She now has to either have an operation or she needs to lie still for 6 weeks. She cannot use crutches as a few years ago, she had an operation on her other leg and some of her cartledge was removed. We've hired her a wheelchair and I just feel so helpless!
The amazing thing? How strong my mother is, her spirits are incredibly high and I am in awe. My family has been amazing too and we have stuck together like glue through all of this.
I could not ask for a better more solid and incredible family.

I just can't believe how this has all happened to one person in a few months!

In other news, I have a headache. I don't think I'm drinking enough....water, that is. I hate water as it is. I am quite snobby when it comes to water. I reckon that if I'm going to drink the awful stuff, I might as well make it good. No tap water for me, but mineral with a slice of lemon or mint or both.
I have neither mineral water, lemon or mint lying around so there goes that idea.
My man got home on Wednesday and I've been rather busy.* Catching up in um...all departments.
Ahem.
We're having a get together tonight at home to catch up with everyone. I have the garlic bread and braai meat ready and lots of wine and Vawter in the fridge. Good times!

Have a brilliant weekend.

*Reason there's been a lapse in blogging.

Domesticated Goddess...disaster?

Wow! So the TV shoot was incredible. I was bloody nervous, but I loved every minute of the 13 hour shoot! I had more make-up on than a transvestite and about 17 layers of powder on top of that! It was awesome!

2 more sleeps until my man comes home. I can't wait. It's hard to explain. These past 2 weeks have been the longest ever and yet at the same time, it's flown by and haven't had a chance to do all the things I thought I would do while he's away! Odd.
Another thing I can't explain. I'm nervous. I have no idea why! I have no idea over what! I have this nervous feeling in my stomach, like a million butterflies suddenly hatched in my stomach. Can't explain it and don't really understand it myself.

My parents are coming around for dinner tonight. I haven't had them around to my place in yonks. I get to play the domesticated, look-how-grown-up-I-am role. Good times. I'm attempting to make a curry. I have no idea what I'm doing. Even with the recipe on the table. Oh good God. Why oh why? Why can't I just stick to sandwiches?
I know why. I want to impress them. Show them that I'm FINE on my own. Show them that I'm a Domesticated Goddess with ambition. Oh yes. Ambitious alright. A fucking curry.
I think something's burning...

My mom

Hospital's are relatively revolting. Clinical, white walls, horrible sterilizing smell and those super bright florescent lights. Horrible.
The hospital my mom is in, is surprisingly pleasant. Well as pleasant as a hospital can be.
The walls are colourful, there are beautiful paintings on the walls, there are lush pot plants (probably plastic but still) and it has no "hospital smell."

My mom is OK (well not really, but I'm not allowing myself to go anywhere near pessimism.) She cannot sit up or stand up from the procedure she went through, so I cleaned her face this morning and put a little bit of make-up on her this morning to make her feel better and feminine. Poor mom. My mom is a class act and just remarkable, really.
She has been admitted until Sunday (we hope) and has become a pin cushion with all the tests they are performing.

It is so weird to see my mom in hospital. She's weepy and worried and I'm used to her being the strong one, the maternal and nurturing one and yet my sister and I have taken on the role of being "mom" to not only my mom but to my dad too.

Thanks for your comments, dudes...I truly appreciate it! I have a family away from home - you rock! x

Hate Hospitals

My mom is in hospital for a Lumber Puncture. I keep saying Lumber Jack. The MRI/MIR (?) scans have come back and she's been admitted into hospital until Sunday. I found out at 2pm and can only see her after 7:30pm.

I'm thinking positively and staying strong for my mom and my family. I'm sure all will be great.

I don't feel like blogging a proper post right now.

Hope your Wednesday is fantabulous!

The Weekend Jig

The weekend has arrived and I have never been more excited! I'm literally doing "The Weekend Jig."
It's cutting edge and I'm just waiting for the right party to debut it. Move aside Macarena!
I don't have anything remarkable happening, no debauchery again (here's hoping) but I'm just glad I get to catch up on sleep and watch the Rugby tomorrow!
I am so thrilled.

I really enjoy eavesdropping. I know it shouldn't be done, but let's face it...we all love a good ear full. I find it fascinating and quite frankly it makes me feel normal.

My man took me for a sushi lunch today and there was a table next to us (as there should be in a restaurant) with 3 guys at it. They were dressed in business suits and must have been in their early 30's.
The convo went like this:
Sunglasses dude: "I really am not sure what to do with my weekend. I am supposed to be seeing Holly but Bianca is bugging me to go out with her. Maybe I should do them both."
Laptop dude hi-5's Sunglasses dude. "Why not? Awesome! Holly is hot, but Bianca has a great pair."
Brightly-coloured-tie dude: "I am supposed to be going to my mom just now at 4pm. She's finished all my washing and ironing and I need to pick it up. Where are we watching the rugby tomorrow?"
The waiter then came to take our order and I missed the rest of the conversation but I was literally gobsmacked and yet I do wonder why I am at all surprised.
Here is this guy (a grown man) in a business suit, looks like he's doing well for himself, and yet his mom is doing his washing and ironing!
DUDE!!
Do these men still exist?

Here is my to do list for the weekend:

• Catch up with sleep
• Watch the rugby at friends
• Visit the parentals
• Watch the Series channel tonight...for all the reality TV shit, I hate to admit I enjoy.
• See Surfer Girl
• Sleep
• Continue with the clearing/cleaning of the garage
• Organise my wardrobe
• Sleep

Rivetting, huh?

I personally, cannot wait!! :-)

Ramblings

I started my boxing classes yesterday. Yup. I took the plunge or is it lunge? I have postponed going because I know that once I start, I wont allow myself to stop.
Well...they say that your body has muscle memory right? Every one of my muscles who has had a lovely long vacation screamed: "Present!" "I'm here!!" "I'm here too!" "Forget about me? I'm also present!"
I am in such pain. In fact, the only piece of anatomy that isn't in agony is my hands, feet and face.
I'm glad I started though. I'm determined to get sexy for Summer. I was actually thinking about taking a headless photo of myself before and then taking a headless pic after 3 months! You know, for motivation!
I didn't want to scare people away though. I might crack the camera lens.
BUT, I'm feeling good!

It is my sister's birthday tomorrow and we're going for a family birthday breakfast at 9am. The thing is my boxing class only ends at 9am and I could give tomorrow a miss, but I'm afraid that's how it starts! If I miss classes in my first 2 weeks, that's it...I'm a gonner!
I'm gonna be late tomorrow and I'm going to arrive all sweaty! Sexy!
Oh and my man's mom lives far away so I suggested she come through tonight, sleep over and then we go to the breakfast. It will save her so much time with the traffic. Thing is, my man has a function to go to tonight. We could go, but she doesn't really want to so I suggested we go out for some dinner and a movie.
Aren't I nice? Haha!

Speaking of movies, I have no idea how this came up but a bunch of my mates and I were chatting about various movies that are dubbed as: Classics.
They're the type of movies where people chat about them or quote a famous movie line. I normally look at them blankly and say: "Never seen it."
I always get the: drop-jaw, gasped "You haven't seen it?? Noooo!!!! Oh you have to see it!"
I clearly missed the very important movie-watching boat. I haven't seen movies like: Gone with the Wind; Reservoir Dogs and now I can't remember the others (damn Murphy's Law)... but if it's a classic; there's a 90% chance I haven't seen it!

Speaking of my "friend" Murphy's Law, I washed my white car today for the first time in months!! I'd actually forgotten it was white...it was a lovely brown-grey...I'm surprised I didn't have the words: WASH ME scratched out.
I washed it today thinking: The chances of rain in Winter are slim, so there! I can wash it today. Maybe it will snow and in that case, AWESOME! I missed the snow when it fell last year. Yup. It fell everywhere except at my house.
So sure...let it snow!
But nooooo...I wash my car and it's lovely and fragrant, sparkly, it's actually white and what happens? I have to drive through a road that has a water pipe leak. Awesome. 3 cars flew into the puddle splashing icky mud water all over my lovely "clean" car!
Fuckers.

Friends, Time and mom's.

So I had a moment of insanity yesterday when I was a little sensitive about seeing my longest friend, whom I hadn't seen in such a long time. We worked it out, it had been since December. Disgusting. I really need to put in more effort. We both do, but it was absolutely fantabulous! We giggled and gossiped and caught up with each others lives as if we had seen each other last week.You really have to treasure a friendship like that!
Besides, any friendship is strengthened by sharing Warm Chocolate Parcels. Even though I was ready to burst, I strangely managed to find space for these delicious, orgasmic parcels.

I couldn't believe how fast time had flown by. Days blur into weeks, weeks blur into months and before you know it we're all screaming "Happy New Year!!"In fact, didn't we just celebrate Christmas?
It's May.
*Just in case you haven't looked.* (Wow, I'm smart today, huh?)

Anyhoo...it's another grown-up weekend. I have a bridal shower tomorrow and I am actually looking forward to it.
It's also Mother's Day on Sunday and I'd like to have my mom over so that I can show her how great my cooking skills have come along. Look, it won't be awfully fancy but it will be rather special!!

Have a wonderful weekend and be good...hahaha - yeah right! x

Guilty spending

I have had an indulgent day. I don't understand why I feel so guilty. It's not like I do this every day!
Why, as women, do we feel guilty when we spend some hard earned money on ourselves? I am one of those who will smudge the truth about what the price tag really says. Yes. I am the one hiding the receipts in a shoe box.
I have no idea why! It's not like I have ever had someone raising an eyebrow or had someone tell me how irresponsible my spending is. Ok, my mom did, but I don't live with my mom anymore. Hmm...maybe it is her fault. Maybe she psychologically fertilized the root of my problem. Poor moms. They get blamed for everything.
I blur the truth of how much things cost to my man. Why? My money is just that...my money. There is no joint bank account (never will be) and I'm certainly not spending his money, so what is the big deal?
It is my own little guilty demon.

Today I have spent a fortune. In fact, I am 102% sure that I have spent the most I ever have in one sitting.
I feel awful.
Thing is, I needed these things. White lie number 5. I needed some of the things. The other 40% were buys that were based purely on: "Oh. My. God! How cute?" and "Oooh that will go so well with what I just bought!" and "It's pay day! You've worked hard...Go on Blondie...you can do it! You can doooo eeeet!!"

I have bought:
The Secret DVD (sick of not actually owning it) and 3 crystals, because I was in the store and the smell of incense made it seem necessary.
5 knitted tops...a pink one, turquoise one, black one, green one, white one, all are super cute.
I bought 3 chunky silver bangles, because I saw this stylish girl in a coffee shop wearing cute chunky bangles and it inspired me to get some of my own.
A winter hat. I love hats. I think I will wear it out tonight and let me blonde hair, desperately in need of a touch up, have a break from embarrassment.
A chunky pair of silver hoop earrings. (not to be worn with the bangles...no need for chunky over kill, right?)
A DVD player and surround sound system...still have no idea why? I think I'm thinking of cosy, blanket covering, hot chocolate drinking, DVD nights.
2 pairs of denim jeans because I need them.
5 sexy pairs of knickers and 4 not-so-sexy pairs of g-strings...also a necessity.

I then sat down for a cup fo tea at a small coffee shop when I saw my mom and sister gliding past me. I had enough packets around me, that I am worried I may have sped up the global warming process. Must recycle.
I immediately felt guilty. My sister instantly dug through the packets with the "Ooohs and Aaaahs" and the standard: Can I borrow this?
I get immediate satisfaction when she says this, because my sister is extremely stylish * in my opinion.*
My sister then asked: "What are you doing for the rest of your morning?"
Kill me now. So I said, "Well...um... I... am... um... goingtogetmynailsmanicured." as quickly as I could.
My mom just looked at me and smiled, saying: "Good! You need knew things and you're looking good Blondie! You're losing weight. I can see it in your face. Keep it up my darling!"
Say what?
No raised eyebrows? No 'tsk tsk's' for over spending?
Whatever is wrong?
My mom immediately looked guilty, "Well...um...I...um... goingtogetmyhairdone!"
Aha! Why do we do this? Why do we feel guilty when we want to spoil/pamper ourselves?
It made me feel better though, seeing my mom act the same guiltily way I did. Genetic, I guess.

I'm going to watch Arno Carstens tonight. It is his final gig before he sets off for the UK, to make it international.
My man is MC-ing and I can't wait to drink champagne with my short and square manicured ruby red nails and my new sexy hat and chunky bangles.

Have a fab long weekend!! x

Age is just a number, right? RIGHT?

I am not a judgemental person. If you're a regular, you'll know I always put myself in other peoples shoes...I'm stumped though. I actually can't do it this time.

We have these family friends we've known for years! There eldest daughter is a year older than I am and their youngest daughter (let's call her X because I am that original) is the same age as my sister (21 turning 22). In fact, we all go way back to primary school.

Well, at my sisters graduation on Tuesday, we all bumped into each other, which was so lovely considering we haven't seen them in a while. I noticed her parents and one of her dad's friends.
Something seemed amiss though. They all seemed to be awkward around each other. X seemed to be distant from her parents.
I didn't think too hard about it. We had the lovely ceremony and then there were refreshments afterwards.
Again, it struck me as odd that X didn't come up to her parents afterwards and be congratulated or be in the photographs etc etc...

The next minute X disappears. Mrs. X comes up to my mom and I and she looked all weepy. She whispered to us: "Do you see that guy standing over there?"
She pointed at Mr. X's friend standing talking to X.
"Well," she continued. "They're dating. They have been for 4 months and our lives have been turned upside down."
Well my mom and I do not get the award for TACT, but our reactions were certainly HONEST!
I mean holy shit! Here is a 53 year old guy dating a 21 year old.
To make things even worse, this guy is a friend of the fathers...he has been a family friend since X was born and practically watched her grow up.
Oh and if that still isn't bad? His 21 year old daughter is best friends with X! Although I can't imagine they would be anymore.

I'm sorry to be judgemental but COME ON!! What the hell is this 53 year olds intentions with a 21 year old...a 21 year old you have family history with.
Something is wrong.

Her parents are besides themselves and the problem is they've sat down with the guy plenty of times trying to talk to him and the more they talk to X, the more she gravitates towards this creepy old dude.

My mom and I felt like total shit because of the way we reacted while this poor woman (normally very strong) broke down.

I haven't stopped thinking about it.